Good question.
Once the deed is done I am so so remorseful. I feel so filthy and pathetic. Thing is, few days later I get to start to feel lustful for this woman again. Urges to be with her etc.
This has been going on for 3 years now like this.
Sin, confession. Sin, confession.....again and again!
Nothing I want more!
I believe evil sits on my shoulder though, taunting me.
Very true.
One priest told me I am very weak. I agree.
I need God's help.
Today I went to confession yet again. In church I begged the Holy Spirit to help me.
I know that I am massively pathetic. But, I truly love God. Yet, I still sin this gigantic sin!
I feel determined not to sin this again, but, I always say that to myself and to God. I always betray God with my false promises.
I want so desperately to change, for the good.
Peace be with you, Dear Sir Goatee.
It is so Good to see you mustering the little strength you have to go to Confession.
That is Incredible in case you don't know that.
Keep going to Confession.
Keep maintaining your Faith.
I have a little suggestion that can assist in your 3 years of struggle.
You have been doing this for a while now so your weakness is understandable.
Do not despair and keep hoping in God.
Because God is a Good God and is Forgiving and Merciful.
Before you go off to do your deed with your friend, say a Rosary to our Lady.
After you do your deed with your friend, say a Rosary to our Lady in the place where you have just done that deed.
Then go to Confession at the earliest opportunity.
When you say the Rosary to our Lady, let Her know you're stuck in mud and desire Heavenly Assistance to get out of the mud because you know God is Good and Generous and Merciful and Forgiving.
Do these things as part of the ritual to assist in your Salvation and Redemption.
Listen to all the advice that you have been given from all of God's People and Ponder on them.
We will be here for you and with you to make sure you make it with us to Heaven.
Heaven will not be the same without you there with us, Dear Sir Goatee.
God bless you, Dear Sir Goatee.