rejected & in need of prayer....

[Sophrosyne]

I too have gone through depression. It is a battle and depending on the source of the depression it can be hard to win. Several things have helped me. First off.... identity. part of depression can be your perception of who others say you are, who you think you are, and circumstance. If you have a negative idea of who you are, you end up fighting yourself to pretend to be happy, you have to change the way you view yourself or you will undo you. Others can lead you to conclude you are a certain negative way and you can accept their opinion and take it as part of your identity.... or who you are and that leads you into depression. The last is circumstance. It is the situation you are in, where you live and people around you that can reinforce who you are either negative or positive.

If any of these things are the root of depression, it requires a decision and insight. If you are the cause because you reinforce yourself in your mind as negative then you have to change that. Your identity has to be who you want to be, which also can be who God says you are in Christ!. At times when I was depressed because I was rather sick, I reminded myself regardless of what happens God loves me and I am worthwhile, I am precious enough that if I were the only one he still would die..... for me. That utterly humbles me in shame that he loves me so much and I am arrogant enough to say.... his opinion of me is worth less than my own.
When others try to drag you down or tell you bad things about you listen and note exactly what they are saying as constructive criticism or destructive criticism. Either they are trying to change you into a butterfly or rip you out of your cocoon and force you to stay in larvae stage. In God's eyes we are all butterflies, sadly many of us consider ourselves ugly worms and tire of eating leaves crawling around a tree with others acting like they can fly saying to us.... you will be stuck on the tree for life.
If you are in a bad situation, changing it may be tough but realizing that there are many things at work here. First... either you put yourself there, Satan got you there, and/or God put or allowed you to be there. After fighting out of depression I can honestly say the second time CAN be easier IF you learned from it. It can be a tool to minister to others and can even be a blessing. Sometimes drastic changes are needed and some can require more than you can muster. Sometimes you just have to wait till you can get out, but in the meantime God can help. You can hide in him, put your burden on Jesus, and God can lift it off you like in Isaiah, take your weariness away so you feel aloft like on an eagles wings.
Those that are praying for you, you will notice it. You will receive it and if you have to lean on God with all your might you will overcome not by your might, but HIS, knowing he will save you. It is ok to feel bad, ok to cry, ok to share your feelings with others, but not ok to ignore God and not share with him, cry to him, tell him you feel bad and praise him for all he has and will do.

I will conclude with a prayer for you.
Lord give this wonderful lady the insight and wisdom to the source of this depression, to seek out the roots of it so she may destroy it and know how it gets ahold of her so she will not be swallowed up again by it. I ask you to fortify her heart against those negative around her willing to drive away those whose words are meant to destroy her. I pray friends that do love God will be prompted by the Holy Spirit to minister to her in truth telling her and witnessing her into a path of change taking her away from this darkness into comforting light. I ask Lord you reveal to her a new purpose, be it only until she grows stronger to a greater purpose or the greater purpose itself. I ask you send her a friend that has fought this and won to take up arms with her to defeat it and your spirit ring true to her the moment she needs it. In Jesus mighty name, Amen.

 

[cardfan1]

Star, thank you for that. I'm trying to hold on to that...

I've been praying... I've been fasting... I've been crying out to God for deliverance, but it just won't come...

I've been reading the Bible, and singing and everything I know to do... And now I feel like I have absolutely no strength to do anything...

Right now I'm facing the hardest thing ever in my life... and I'm facing it all alone... Sometimes I feel like it'll never get better.

And I can always find the right words for everybody else, but I can't find the words for myself. I can manage to cheer up everybody around me... prophesy them out of depression... give them words of encouragement... and then when it comes to me... I feel all drained... I don't know what to say to myself... I feel so weak.

Nobody encourages me when I'm in need... they don't even know I hurt like this, and they're right in the next room...

I had a friend who was encouraging me and helping me so much... but I guess I ran him away with my problems... Now I feel hopeless... alone... depressed. All I had was his words... He was the only one that ever encouraged me and let me know that I could make it, but now... I ran him away too, I guess.

I just don't know what to do...

First off, I am truly sorry you are feeling so down and I'm praying for you. I myself am not feeling so good today and I know what it's like to feel like no one understands your pain or frustration. I know words don't alway provide the full comfort you desire, but please know you are not alone. If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, I'm sure you've heard it before, but you are definitely not alone. Sophrosyne made a good point - even if you were the only one in the whole world to accept Jesus, He would still have died on the cross for you.

And I know what you mean about praying incesently, reading the bible, fasting, singing, and doint anything you can to draw nearer to God. For a long time I did all these things and wondered why I wasn't feeling better. So I'd try even harder to try to make God stop punishing me. Until I started to realize, perhaps God isn't punishing me, maybe He really does love me beyond my comprehension. Why else would He send his ONLY son to die for us?

While all these things are very important in our Christian life, I think it is also very important that you understand sister, there is NOTHING you can do to gain any favor with God. If you sat in your room for the rest of your life, you still would not be any closer to heaven than if you went to church everyday. ALL that ever needed to be done was done in the FINISHED work of Christ on the cross. I still struggle with faith, obedience, and other aspects of my Christian life, but it sure does provide comfort in knowing that no matter what I do or what I don't do, the Lord Jesus Christ has promised to love me without end.

I know depression can be a killer. It's a painful struggle that SEEMS to have no end. But hang in there sister. You are not alone. The Lord loves you very much, and there are people out there that love you and are praying for you as well. Sometimes the Lord allows us to go through things in life we don't understand. And even though we can't see it all the time, He is working on you through these difficult times. It may be painful, but the Lord will never give you more than you can handle. And He never allows the hard times without a cause. But He will perform His perfect work on His time, not yours. There is a reason you are going through what you are, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel even if you can't see it right now. I pray that you may feel better. I pray that the Lord may grant you comfort and patience through this. Stay in the Word, continue in prayer, and continue to seek His will and understanding. Put your faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, and He will take you by the hand and lead you through.

May God bless you.

 

[rocklife]

praying for you

I also find listening to Bible on walkmen tapes to be comforting to me. you can listen online free at www.biblegateway.com on the bottom link at Listen. (but walkmen tapes you can carry everywhere). that actually seems to help me not feel lonely, listening to God's words, and then praying and following Jesus. I hope you feel better

 

[jazzypooh]

I too have gone through depression. It is a battle and depending on the source of the depression it can be hard to win. Several things have helped me. First off.... identity. part of depression can be your perception of who others say you are, who you think you are, and circumstance. If you have a negative idea of who you are, you end up fighting yourself to pretend to be happy, you have to change the way you view yourself or you will undo you. Others can lead you to conclude you are a certain negative way and you can accept their opinion and take it as part of your identity.... or who you are and that leads you into depression. The last is circumstance. It is the situation you are in, where you live and people around you that can reinforce who you are either negative or positive.

If any of these things are the root of depression, it requires a decision and insight. If you are the cause because you reinforce yourself in your mind as negative then you have to change that. Your identity has to be who you want to be, which also can be who God says you are in Christ!. At times when I was depressed because I was rather sick, I reminded myself regardless of what happens God loves me and I am worthwhile, I am precious enough that if I were the only one he still would die..... for me. That utterly humbles me in shame that he loves me so much and I am arrogant enough to say.... his opinion of me is worth less than my own.
When others try to drag you down or tell you bad things about you listen and note exactly what they are saying as constructive criticism or destructive criticism. Either they are trying to change you into a butterfly or rip you out of your cocoon and force you to stay in larvae stage. In God's eyes we are all butterflies, sadly many of us consider ourselves ugly worms and tire of eating leaves crawling around a tree with others acting like they can fly saying to us.... you will be stuck on the tree for life.
If you are in a bad situation, changing it may be tough but realizing that there are many things at work here. First... either you put yourself there, Satan got you there, and/or God put or allowed you to be there. After fighting out of depression I can honestly say the second time CAN be easier IF you learned from it. It can be a tool to minister to others and can even be a blessing. Sometimes drastic changes are needed and some can require more than you can muster. Sometimes you just have to wait till you can get out, but in the meantime God can help. You can hide in him, put your burden on Jesus, and God can lift it off you like in Isaiah, take your weariness away so you feel aloft like on an eagles wings.
Those that are praying for you, you will notice it. You will receive it and if you have to lean on God with all your might you will overcome not by your might, but HIS, knowing he will save you. It is ok to feel bad, ok to cry, ok to share your feelings with others, but not ok to ignore God and not share with him, cry to him, tell him you feel bad and praise him for all he has and will do.

I will conclude with a prayer for you.
Lord give this wonderful lady the insight and wisdom to the source of this depression, to seek out the roots of it so she may destroy it and know how it gets ahold of her so she will not be swallowed up again by it. I ask you to fortify her heart against those negative around her willing to drive away those whose words are meant to destroy her. I pray friends that do love God will be prompted by the Holy Spirit to minister to her in truth telling her and witnessing her into a path of change taking her away from this darkness into comforting light. I ask Lord you reveal to her a new purpose, be it only until she grows stronger to a greater purpose or the greater purpose itself. I ask you send her a friend that has fought this and won to take up arms with her to defeat it and your spirit ring true to her the moment she needs it. In Jesus mighty name, Amen.

thank you. i receive your words. i especially receive what you said about not ignoring God during this time, because that's kind of what i've been doing. i mean i would talk to Him about it, but i guess i don't stay long enough to really hear Him out about this, partly the reason for that is because i feel like He's moving too slow with this. i really want this whole thing to be over, but for some reason God is keeping me in this... so i guess i really do need to stop avoiding Him and just go to Him so i can find out why He still has me here...

maybe i need to stop focusing so much on the pain... that's probably my biggest problem... i keep focusing on how much it hurts and how long it's taking to end... so i guess i need to really be praying for patience and seeking the Lord during this time more than ever before...

thank you for your words

 

[jazzypooh]

First off, I am truly sorry you are feeling so down and I'm praying for you. I myself am not feeling so good today and I know what it's like to feel like no one understands your pain or frustration. I know words don't alway provide the full comfort you desire, but please know you are not alone. If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, I'm sure you've heard it before, but you are definitely not alone. Sophrosyne made a good point - even if you were the only one in the whole world to accept Jesus, He would still have died on the cross for you.

And I know what you mean about praying incesently, reading the bible, fasting, singing, and doint anything you can to draw nearer to God. For a long time I did all these things and wondered why I wasn't feeling better. So I'd try even harder to try to make God stop punishing me. Until I started to realize, perhaps God isn't punishing me, maybe He really does love me beyond my comprehension. Why else would He send his ONLY son to die for us?

While all these things are very important in our Christian life, I think it is also very important that you understand sister, there is NOTHING you can do to gain any favor with God. If you sat in your room for the rest of your life, you still would not be any closer to heaven than if you went to church everyday. ALL that ever needed to be done was done in the FINISHED work of Christ on the cross. I still struggle with faith, obedience, and other aspects of my Christian life, but it sure does provide comfort in knowing that no matter what I do or what I don't do, the Lord Jesus Christ has promised to love me without end.

I know depression can be a killer. It's a painful struggle that SEEMS to have no end. But hang in there sister. You are not alone. The Lord loves you very much, and there are people out there that love you and are praying for you as well. Sometimes the Lord allows us to go through things in life we don't understand. And even though we can't see it all the time, He is working on you through these difficult times. It may be painful, but the Lord will never give you more than you can handle. And He never allows the hard times without a cause. But He will perform His perfect work on His time, not yours. There is a reason you are going through what you are, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel even if you can't see it right now. I pray that you may feel better. I pray that the Lord may grant you comfort and patience through this. Stay in the Word, continue in prayer, and continue to seek His will and understanding. Put your faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, and He will take you by the hand and lead you through.

May God bless you.

i appreciate your words so much. i appreciate your prayers as well. i will try to stay mindful of everything that has been said...

i've been trying to embrace what you said about everything being finished on the cross for like the last week or so... i guess it gets hard to understand how it's finished when you're still in the pain of it... but i'm trying to walk this thing out according to knowledge and not according to what i'm feeling in my emotions... this seems to be the hardest part of maturing in God... walking by faith and not by sight, especially when what you see makes you feel so weak like you just can't even bear it any longer... thank you for your words and please keep me in your prayers.

God bless you.

 

[GQ Chris]

Keep your Head up, the Lord knows fully well what it feels like to be alone and rejected. Cast your cares on him because he cares for you.

 

[Sophrosyne]

thank you. i receive your words. i especially receive what you said about not ignoring God during this time, because that's kind of what i've been doing. i mean i would talk to Him about it, but i guess i don't stay long enough to really hear Him out about this, partly the reason for that is because i feel like He's moving too slow with this. i really want this whole thing to be over, but for some reason God is keeping me in this... so i guess i really do need to stop avoiding Him and just go to Him so i can find out why He still has me here...

maybe i need to stop focusing so much on the pain... that's probably my biggest problem... i keep focusing on how much it hurts and how long it's taking to end... so i guess i need to really be praying for patience and seeking the Lord during this time more than ever before... thank you for your words

I understand that. For 35 years I was one of the healthiest people I knew. I was never sick for long. The flu would be over in 6 hours with me, colds 1/3 as long as most. I haven't had the flu for so long I cannot remember. But for some reason I got messed and was sick just enough I couldn't work, couldn't play sports, and couldn't stand in church for more than about 10 minutes without fainting. I would have days where I could barely get out of bed. I kept wondering why all this happened.. I have never got an explanation but sitting back thinking I had a hard time sympathizing with those that were sick and while I was sick all the stuff that was keeping me from God I was slowly doing. I am now different because of that. I have a lot more patience and stop and take time to care more than I ever did.
Sometimes the journey is better than the destination, sometimes the destination is better than the journey... but learning from the journey is a reward in life.
I had to many time focus on God when I felt bad because if I didn't I would have probably ended my life but I knew I was going to pull through for some reason. I knew all that suffering would be used by God to touch....... just one and it would be well worth it.
I recall Paul saying something like he would go to hell to save his fellow Jews. It takes suffering to realize sometimes how utterly AWESOME God is!!.... You will pull through and in time it will become a memory but if you overcome in God, it will be a victory instead.

 

[jazzypooh]

rocklife, thank you. at this point i'm willing to try any advice that's given... as long as it is Biblical... lol!

but i will try that. i have some books of the Bible on cd at home, so maybe i'll start there. i can put them on my mp3 player and listen to it while i'm in bed or whenever. so i will do that. i thank you and everyone else for all of your advice. i really do appreciate it and i appreciate all of the prayers that have gone up on my behalf. i pray that God blesses each and every one of you and grants you all your needs as well. thank you and God bless!

 

[jazzypooh]

I understand that. For 35 years I was one of the healthiest people I knew. I was never sick for long. The flu would be over in 6 hours with me, colds 1/3 as long as most. I haven't had the flu for so long I cannot remember. But for some reason I got messed and was sick just enough I couldn't work, couldn't play sports, and couldn't stand in church for more than about 10 minutes without fainting. I would have days where I could barely get out of bed. I kept wondering why all this happened.. I have never got an explanation but sitting back thinking I had a hard time sympathizing with those that were sick and while I was sick all the stuff that was keeping me from God I was slowly doing. I am now different because of that. I have a lot more patience and stop and take time to care more than I ever did.
Sometimes the journey is better than the destination, sometimes the destination is better than the journey... but learning from the journey is a reward in life.
I had to many time focus on God when I felt bad because if I didn't I would have probably ended my life but I knew I was going to pull through for some reason. I knew all that suffering would be used by God to touch....... just one and it would be well worth it.
I recall Paul saying something like he would go to hell to save his fellow Jews. It takes suffering to realize sometimes how utterly AWESOME God is!!.... You will pull through and in time it will become a memory but if you overcome in God, it will be a victory instead.

thank you for that. i will hold on to your testimony and stay mindful of your words. God bless you.

 

[Starr SDA Living Word]

I am still praying for you. I love you my special friend.

 

[jazzypooh]

God bless you Star!

i am doing much better with this now. the Lord is showing me how to walk out my healing and deliverance and to align my emotions up with His Word. i'm going to stop giving the enemy room in my life!

so like u said, instead of saying i am depressed, i now say i WAS depressed, but the Lord has healed me. He does give power to the weak.

Psalm 116:7-9 (AMP)
Return to your rest, O my soul, for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you. For You have delivered my life from death, my eyes from tears, and my feet from stumbling and falling. I will walk before the Lord in the land of the living.

This scripture blessed me so much. Our soul is our mind, emotions and our will. this is exactly where the enemy was attacking me at. this is exactly where depression rests - in your soul. but the Lord took me to this scripture, and i began to speak to my soul. we have to speak to our emotions and force them to agree with the Word of God. we return to our rest in Jesus, and we stop allowing the depression to rest in our souls. we stop giving room to the enemy. So when i pray, i say Return to your rest, O my soul, for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you. and there is so much power in the Word of God. the Bible says that the Word of God is alive and full of power! there is power for healing and deliverance in His Word for anything that is troubling us.

Matthew 11:28-30 also helped me out, because it talks about coming to Jesus and finding rest for your soul in Him. in the Amplified, Jesus says that He will ease and relieve and refresh your soul if you come to Him. and He will allow you to exchange yokes/burdens with Him, because His yoke is easy and His burden is light. i pray that God blesses each of you. and i thank you for being a source of strength during a difficult time in my life. i also pray that these scriptures bless you in the same way that they have blessed me. God bless you!