Privacy alert

[McScribe]

First of all, this is a public forum. Just as any statement made by any person in public is considered fair game for journalists, bloggers and indeed anyone to quote, frankly if you say something here you're sharing it with everyone. End of story. There is no confidentiality here except if you are sending personal messages or emails. If that had been shared, then I would see the concern.

Second: Dalrock is not a woman hating site, but it is a site where men express their honest frustration with present day gender relations. Yes, a lot of men are angry about it. If women can't handle the idea that there are men with a general sense of anger about gender relations, maybe they should, if they relish their equality, take an objective step back and wonder why before having this knee jerk reaction.

 

[Chaplain David]

CHAPLAIN SUGGESTIONS

Ladies and gentlemen, let's all remember that we are supposed to be debating the topic and not overly personalizing our remarks with jibs, jabs, and accusations. The OP has brought up something that concerns her. Let's each of us treat each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, sticking to the topic, and not personalize our posts after all we are not debating the merits or criticisms of the posters or remarks we don't like but a topic. Thank you very much and God bless.

 

[McScribe]

CHAPLAIN SUGGESTIONS

Ladies and gentlemen, let's all remember that we are supposed to be debating the topic and not overly personalizing our remarks with jibs, jabs, and accusations. The OP has brought up something that concerns her. Let's each of us treat each other as brothers and sisters in Christ, sticking to the topic, and not personalize our posts after all we are not debating the merits or criticisms of the posters or remarks we don't like but a topic. Thank you very much and God bless.

The Chaplain is absolutely right. The Bible says that offenses will come, but woe to he by whom offenses come. That applies to she as well of course.

 

[Tamara224]

You guys are beyond ridiculous.

What it boils down to is you didn't defend us because you agree that we are what that NON-Christian misogynist says we are.

And then you want us to believe you're the "spiritual leaders". Bah.

 

[chaz345]

take an objective step back and wonder why before having this knee jerk reaction.

See that's just it. In my opinion and in my experience here, this is something that they cannot or will not do. It's simply the man's fault. He's angry or mean or hates women by nature. The idea that his current state of mind has any reasonable basis in his own experiences with women is simply not something that can be comprehended.

It would be funny if it weren't so sad. Woman has a terrible experience with a man who cheats or beats or whatever and all manner of grossly unfair anti-male generalities are excused or justified. Man has a similar terrible experience and anything he says along the same lines is met with anything but understanding.

 

[c1ners]

See that's just it. In my opinion and in my experience here, this is something that they cannot or will not do. It's simply the man's fault. He's angry or mean or hates women by nature. The idea that his current state of mind has any reasonable basis in his own experiences with women is simply not something that can be comprehended.

It would be funny if it weren't so sad. Woman has a terrible experience with a man who cheats or beats or whatever and all manner of grossly unfair anti-male generalities are excused or justified. Man has a similar terrible experience and anything he says along the same lines is met with anything but understanding.

I see this as manipulating the situation and turing the blame around to be the womans fault. We are not blaming ALL men. But what A few of the men did to a few of the women by quoting them in that other forum was just plain wrong.

Not only did they get quoted, but their profiles were linked to. Their trust taken advantage of. I can not see how you can turn this around to being OUR fault?

Yes, men have every right to complain about things that bother them. Just as we women do, but to go and quote us wihtout our knowledge is not the way to go about it. To laugh at us behind our backs to people we have never had anything to do with, is humilating.

It was wrong. Plain and simple. Wrong on many counts.

 

[Niffer]

But this is personal.
McS, of course those sites have every right to exist. No one can control that.
And yes, everything here is technically public, I understand that too.

But it's not just "some guy said bad stuff about women in general, so call to arms!"
It's that a man is bashing a friend of mine, someone who I know, and feel a connection with.
This man knows nothing, yet paints my friend out to be some femenazi, without knowing (or caring) about the real story.

And as sad as that is, men here on this site, who also know her and talk with her on an almost regular basis, sees what this horrid man is doing and does nothing.
Nothing.
Either joins in on the poking fun, or just sits there and shrugs.

Thats the problem here.
I'd be just as upset if the women here did the same thing.

We should be on the same team here - are we not all brothers and sisters??

Peace
-Niffer

 

[chaz345]

You guys are beyond ridiculous.

What it boils down to is you didn't defend us because you agree that we are what that NON-Christian misogynist says we are.

And then you want us to believe you're the "spiritual leaders". Bah.

And this post is supposed to cause us to feel differently exactly how?

 

[McScribe]

Before this discussion goes on I'd like to know what posts exactly are causing the offense please, or did I miss a link somewhere that goes to them exactly?

 

[McScribe]

I see this as manipulating the situation and turing the blame around to be the womans fault. We are not blaming ALL men. But what A few of the men did to a few of the women by quoting them in that other forum was just plain wrong.

Not only did they get quoted, but their profiles were linked to. Their trust taken advantage of. I can not see how you can turn this around to being OUR fault?

Yes, men have every right to complain about things that bother them. Just as we women do, but to go and quote us wihtout our knowledge is not the way to go about it. To laugh at us behind our backs to people we have never had anything to do with, is humilating.

It was wrong. Plain and simple. Wrong on many counts.

Just to back up what I said just above--where is this happening, please?

 

[c1ners]

double post

 

[chaz345]

I see this as manipulating the situation and turing the blame around to be the womans fault. We are not blaming ALL men. But what A few of the men did to a few of the women by quoting them in that other forum was just plain wrong.

Let's stop pretending that the same thing isn't done on women's blogs too though. I've seen it. And in some ways it's worse because in that case the blog owner was actually a member here.

 

[Niffer]

And this post is supposed to cause us to feel differently exactly how?

Well then, what about my post? any of my former posts in this thread.
I love for some understanding as to where we may be coming from - I can imagine how you would feel if I put your avatar, link to your posts, put it on a popular blog where hundreds view it, allow those people to link back here to view any/all of your threads/posts and say: "Look what a fool!!"

Chaz, I've agreed with you on a number of occasions and talked in many of the same threads, do you think I, or any of us, deserve to be treated like that?

Peace,
-Niffer

 

[c1ners]

This is just one: There are more coming:

Why so many wives wish their husbands would cheat. | Dalrock

another:

http://www.christianforums.com/redirect-to/?redirect=http%3A%2F%2Fdalrock.wordpress.com%2F2012%2F03%2F03%2Ffrom-cornerstone-to-stepping-stone-the-mainstream-christian-view-of-marriage%2F

last one:

http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2011/12/01/shattering-the-forcefield-of-denial/

As you can see, not only are they mentioning screen names of these women, but they are linking them back to here and to our profiles.

I do understand that right now I am doing the same thing by linking those posts above, but my intent isn't to meliciously harm anyone or to make fun. You McS requested proof, and that's what I am giving you.

 

[Tamara224]

And this post is supposed to cause us to feel differently exactly how?

It's not. I don't try to manipulate people's feelings.

I just say what I think.

 

[chaz345]

Well then, what about my post? any of my former posts in this thread.
I love for some understanding as to where we may be coming from - I can imagine how you would feel if I put your avatar, link to your posts, put it on a popular blog where hundreds view it, allow those people to link back here to view any/all of your threads/posts and say: "Look what a fool!!"

Chaz, I've agreed with you on a number of occasions and talked in many of the same threads, do you think I, or any of us, deserve to be treated like that?

Peace,
-Niffer

You no. Some of the others? Probably still no but I can absolutely see why there's no defense of them either.

And for the record I've been violated in a much more personal way by a thankfully former member here. She took the time to ascertain my real life identity and write a long rant to my wife on Facebook detailing my "inapropriate" relationship with another poster here.

 

[McScribe]

This is just one: There are more coming:

Why so many wives wish their husbands would cheat. | Dalrock

another:

From cornerstone to stepping stone; the mainstream Christian view of marriage. | Dalrock

Well, the posters quoted--including a male poster in one case at leat--said the things that they said. They expressed the views that they expressed. The blogger chose to agree or disagree with the views expressed.

Let me be clear about this--the blogger is not saying that dreamer is the embodiment of evil, or that she's an immoral person in every way or anything like that. He's saying that he disagrees with some of what she has said on the subject of marriage--strongly disagrees. Why is this an issue? No one is talking about genuinely private concerns here; what's being discussed are things that she said in a public forum that anyone can sign up for. If you are for example interviewed on one show they might very well quote it on another if they think it's news.

And as chaz has said, at least one female blogger, Psalm63, quoted a number of people from this forum on her blog. None of us complained when she did, because it's a public forum, even though she was disagreeing and in some cases misinterpreting the meaning and intent of what was said.

 

[Tamara224]

Let's stop pretending that the same thing isn't done on women's blogs too though. I've seen it. And in some ways it's worse because in that case the blog owner was actually a member here.

Let's stop pretending we're talking about random people out in the internet that have no connection to the PEOPLE who regularly post here.

No women from this forum have gone and posted vile things about men in this forum on other sites. No women in this forum have linked to hateful misandric websites bashing men from this forum.

That some women out there say terrible things about men is undoubtedly true. But you've got no link from those women to the women here.

We're not guilty for other women's sins just by virtue of sharing the same XX chromosomes. Just as you're not guilty for other men's sins just by virtue of being a man.

There has to be some connection.

And you're flailing around grasping at straws to try to shift the blame. It's ridiculous.

 

[Niffer]

You no. Some of the others? Probably still no but I can absolutely see why there's no defense of them either.

And for the record I've been violated in a much more personal way by a thankfully former member here. She took the time to ascertain my real life identity and write a long rant to my wife on Facebook detailing my "inapropriate" relationship with another poster here.

Hm, I do remember that.
It's unbelievably hurtful isn't it? I'm so sorry your privacy was invaded in that way, and the extent that some people will go to hurt another is astounding.
I'm just trying to point out, that like you, this is another big hurt.
This is an out-of-nowhere slap in the face type hurt - which I can assume you understand based on what happened to you!

I'm really just trying to get people to put on another's shoes, and see that this is hurtful no matter who does it or why - and I am defending a friend, just as I would if it were one of my CF man friends getting bashed.

Peace,
-Niffer

 

[pgp_protector]

Ok I'm trying to figure out one thing here.
What Privacy violation was their in copying Public Post from one site onto another Public site?

Copyright Violations, you might be able to make that argument, but I'm not a copyright lawyer, but Privacy violation, I'm not seeing one.