Prayer for better relationships with people

[Philip22]

I have tried to reduce the regularly that I ask this, but I am frustrated. Of course I am asking for prayers in regards to my relationship with Daniel, a co worker. Of course I would love to be friends with him, he is a good person , I think has a good soul, although not perfect , as no human being is I have been asking for prayers for our relationship to improve this for some time and I want to give praise to GOD because I do believe that our relationship has improved to a certain extent , it is a hit and miss at times from day to day , sometimes it seems like we are on really good terms and then I do something stupid and it is like starting all over again.

But it is much more than that, much more than just Daniel. Of course I struggle with SAD...Social Anxiety disorder...so my behavior can be odd at times….. I can be very very stupid, foolish. I do believe that GOD has provided opportunities to become a friend to Daniel and have made the mistake of thinking that it is going to be easy. IT is not always easy. anything worth having one has to work for/at. People say you should not have to work hard to make a relationship work... They've probably never experienced the joy of achieving something with hard work.

In short I am tired of being lonely.

So as before I ask that GOD will soften Daniels heart and mind to to be more forgiving of my stupidity...I can be a jerk at times.



I know that many/most of you do not and will never completely understand how and why I look at the situation as I do...I will say that when you spend a "lifetime' as an outsider you tend to value/ cherish other people, their friendship a little more. than most people do .

What most take for granted, some have to fight for.




For those that are new to my request I would refer you to my other threads.


And to those who think that my prayer request is odd , I leave this….

Thank you for your prayers

 

[Philip22]

Ultimately nut only would I woulf like GOD provide opportunities for me to redeem myself with Daniel or to apologize but also the ability to recognize those opportunities . But Also for GOD to give Daniel an understanding that my foolishness /stupidity was a result of anxiety, trying to get remove myself from something that made me uncomfortable and that I never intended to be rude or disrespectful....all of that was unintentional

 

[bèlla]

Are you desiring to develop friendships or is Daniel your only focus? Do you have feelings for him that aren’t platonic?

Some people keep professional boundaries in place at work and refuse to be friends with their coworkers. I don’t know if that’s the case. But it may not be the result of something you’ve done.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

 

[LoricaLady]

I have tried to reduce the regularly that I ask this, but I am frustrated. Of course I am asking for prayers in regards to my relationship with Daniel, a co worker. Of course I would love to be friends with him, he is a good person , I think has a good soul, although not perfect , as no human being is I have been asking for prayers for our relationship to improve this for some time and I want to give praise to GOD because I do believe that our relationship has improved to a certain extent , it is a hit and miss at times from day to day , sometimes it seems like we are on really good terms and then I do something stupid and it is like starting all over again.

But it is much more than that, much more than just Daniel. Of course I struggle with SAD...Social Anxiety disorder...so my behavior can be odd at times….. I can be very very stupid, foolish. I do believe that GOD has provided opportunities to become a friend to Daniel and have made the mistake of thinking that it is going to be easy. IT is not always easy. anything worth having one has to work for/at. People say you should not have to work hard to make a relationship work... They've probably never experienced the joy of achieving something with hard work.

In short I am tired of being lonely.

So as before I ask that GOD will soften Daniels heart and mind to to be more forgiving of my stupidity...I can be a jerk at times.



I know that many/most of you do not and will never completely understand how and why I look at the situation as I do...I will say that when you spend a "lifetime' as an outsider you tend to value/ cherish other people, their friendship a little more. than most people do .

What most take for granted, some have to fight for.




For those that are new to my request I would refer you to my other threads.


And to those who think that my prayer request is odd , I leave this….

Thank you for your prayers

I have seen a channel on YouTube called Bright Side. Some of their videos give lots of information on improving social skills.

No doubt you can find other such information on the net, or at your local library.

I pray you will be given light and wisdom and that you will not be lonely.

 

[Philip22]

I just wanted to add that I do truely need an advocate right now, someone to help Daniel understand that any rudeness or disrespect is unintentional. On in addition to anxiety , or perhaps it goes hand in hand with it..I am a very serious, reserved person and know that can be misinterpreted as well....as being arrogant. I need someone to open Daniels mind and heart that simply the case, I turn to to other Christians to pray for my situation to GOD on my behalf.


It is a difficult situation and I am trying to summarize it...basically it comes down to just being so tried of being alone.

I speak the truth when I say despite my best efforts in life, I have never have had a single friend....as someone in the mid twenties..that is pretty pathetic Looking around me and see everyone else enjoy the benefits and happiness of friendship and being left out. Truth society is very superficial, shallow and judgemental and i would hate to think that I am so hideous that no one want anything to do with me except except /unless there is a monetary incentive.

The other aspect of the situation that really bothers me is not representing christianity in the best manor anf thus not being a good witness to Daniel..bringing glory to GOD. That bothers me just as much if not more at times

Again Thank you for your prayers.....and Merry Christmas may all of you have a blessed one!!

 

[Philip22]

I do want to also point out that this ia a lot more encompassing that just Daniel...it is more about relationship with people overall.. Daniel just tend to be the main focus right now because of where I work, the very judgemental environment and the fact that he tends to take the high road, and tries to be a friend to everyone regardless of nasty rumors and gossip.

 

[Philip22]

Are you desiring to develop friendships or is Daniel your only focus? Do you have feelings for him that aren’t platonic?

Some people keep professional boundaries in place at work and refuse to be friends with their coworkers. I don’t know if that’s the case. But it may not be the result of something you’ve done.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

I understand what you are implying, and I will admit that by revisiting the issue with Daniel it may create a certain impression. And I would say NO to that. But ultimately it comes down to the fact I really struggle connecting with people, being accepted and one can speculate as to the reasons why. But when I feel like that I have finally connected with someone I cherish that a lot more than a typical average person, who connects easily with others. My most people understand that. . If I wrong someone I feel bad because I had to work so hard to establish that connection/relationship

I will say that because I lack people skills, lack the ability to "read the room" It is a well know fact that I can be unintentionally rude/offensive.....my own family members will confirm that . And if we are to be honest I do struggle with social anxiety and that leads me to be quite reserved which is interpreted as rudeness at time.

I am just very frustrated, and Daniel tends to be my focus right now, I need an advocate, someone to intervene.To make it right. But overall it is wanting to be a better, people person, to have GOD to give me the wisdom to interact with people more successfully.

Also in regards to your claims of professional boundaries...Daniel is not like that, he is interested in being friends with people.......which make it even more difficult for me knowing that..the fact that I cant or have been unsuccessful at quite winning him over.

But like I said there is a lot more going on that just Daniel....just frustration over being socially awkward and and being lonely . FYI the was a lady that I was friendly with but she ended revealing that she is a b**** Just adds to my frustration.

I don't really expect people to truely understand....just that when one spends a lifetime being an outcast, one tends to have a greater appreciation for interactions with other......I think that should make sense to anyone.

As I have said before.....What most take for granted, some have to fight for. If you are able to understand that then you be able to understand as to why I feel so strongly about the matter.

Regardless....,

Your prayers are appreciated! Thank you

 

[Philip22]

This will be the last post I will make on this issue , hopefully for awhile. I don't know if I can adequately explain it but I think there is something much larger at play here than just Daniel. It is more about over coming social anxiety, something which has caused me to be very foolish and stupid with Daniel, someone who I do feel a lot in common with and would like to be on friendly term with at the very least...but anxiety also has caused me to miss out on career opportunities and advancements.

I think where Daniel comes into play is that I feel if I can redeem myself with him, by the grace of GOD, through my actions and words then there is some hope that I am overcoming anxiety, being the oddball. I definitely need a miracle however...a Christmas miracle of sorts. I need GOD to show me opportunities, open my eyes to how I can do that and know what to say at the same time as I have said before to open Daniels mind and Heart to recognize a lot of the odd behavior or stupid thing that I say mean nothing, certainly not meant to be disrespectful or rude to him in anyway, just anxiety or uncomfortableness revealing itself.

But I definitely do need a miracle, an advocate, intervention of a certain kind. A supernatural intervention/miracle.

 

[bèlla]

How would an advocate make it right? You can acknowledge your condition. But I'd be lighthearted about it.

A simple statement...I appreciate your patience. My anxiety makes me quirky. I'd leave it at that.

It sounds like he's polite and friendly. Does he spend time with coworkers outside of the job? If he's willing to hangout with them, that's a friendship. But if it never leaves the office they're 'work friends'.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

 

[Unqualified]

If you want a friend be a friend. And be patient the two of you are not going anywhere. It takes time, pray before going to work,
Read the Bible for stress relief and peace.

I did the same this with my best guy friend, pray be relaxed don’t stress. You shouldn’t put it all on one guy, accept peaceful coexistence maybe. Try others. I am praying for your miracle of friendship and miracle in your own disposition.

you need a Christian for a friend who is forgiving and compassionate and so you have something i common. Who is a friend because of and of Jesus. Go to church and find a friend.

 

[Philip22]

Thank you for your prayers........I want to share this today, because I do believe with all of my heart that GOD did intervene in the situation... he saw the purity of my heart, my request and answered it., now I just have to be smart and disciplined , not to do anything stupid, foolish to eradicate, diminish the progress forward toward a restored "friendship"

Father, you are the Alpha and Omega, the Beginning and the End. You are the Christ, the Son of the Living God. You are my Creator and my Counselor, guiding me daily to make wise decisions. You are my Comforter in sorrow, pain, or distress. I praise you for drawing near to me when I draw near to you. You are ., the God who sees me, and you are Eternal, Lord. You are my heavenly Father, and the father of the fatherless. How great are you and your faithfulness, God, day in and day out.

You are holy, yet you made a way for me to approach you. I praise you for being my Helper, and for your Holy Spirit's conviction, correction, and protection in my life. You are invisible, but I see you with eyes of faith. You are Jehovah God, and Jehovah , the One who provides for all my needs. I praise you as my Jehovah , my God who heals, and for being Jehovah , My faithful Shepherd. You are not just King, but you are King of Kings, and Lord of Lords. And yes, you are Jesus, the name above all names.


With my whole heart I praise you, God. You are Messiah, the soon and coming King. You are omniscient; you know all things. You are omnipresent; everywhere at all times. You are my Peace, my Protector, and the High Priest who became my Redeemer and Sacrifice forever. You died to set me free; you rose again and gave me victory over death. No longer am I enslaved in sin; you are my Salvation, my Rescuer and my Refuge. You give me hope within.


I praise you because you are trustworthy and true. You are my Teacher, and your understanding and wisdom is beyond finite minds; you promise wisdom to me when I ask. You are the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Lord, I love that you delight in me and that you rejoice over me with singing. You know the number of hairs on my head, and you are always thinking of me.


You are preparing a place for me so that one day I will live with you forever. Maybe then—and only then—will I be able to praise you adequately in a way not possible here on earth—the way you truly deserve.


All my love, all my praise to you. Lord, oh, Lord. How excellent is your name in which I pray!


Amen

 

[Philip22]

How would an advocate make it right? You can acknowledge your condition. But I'd be lighthearted about it.

A simple statement...I appreciate your patience. My anxiety makes me quirky. I'd leave it at that.

It sounds like he's polite and friendly. Does he spend time with coworkers outside of the job? If he's willing to hangout with them, that's a friendship. But if it never leaves the office they're 'work friends'.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

Of course I have dialed back expressing my frustration, partially because I have come to recognize how annoying it could be but also as I mentioned in my last post on Thursday,, Christmas Eve ..... there has been some positive progress forward to being on better terms with Daniel. There seems to be a little more friendliness.....although it is not what it once was, in the earlier stages of our friendship...the carefulness, playfulness is not there, the connection that we once had , perhaps that will or could return with time.

The focus at this moment is on Daniel but as I stated before , my overall frustration is a lot larger than that, more than just Daniel. The fact that whatever I do, seems to be not good enough to make friends. My people skills leave a lot to be desired, unfortunately.....or so it seems.

That is why I will ask for continued prayers for this matter, and overall for my people skills to improve. That GOD will give me the wisdom to know what to say and do,... because as someone who suffers from social anxiety...it does not come naturally for me.....to win people over that is.

Also I pray for the opportunity to apologize to Daniel..if for no other reason to make it right, for my own peace of mind....perhaps we could carpool together and that could be an opportunity to apologize.

I thank those of you who continue to prayer for me as I truly do believe through your efforts , your prayers , somethings have begun to improve but much work and prayers are still needed.

And most importantly, once again I want to give praise to GOD for intervening and helping improve the situation......I truly do believe that he want to see his children happy, and this is one thing that would make me very happy.. GOD created people to be social beings