~Please Pray For Me~

Status
Not open for further replies.

jess9450

Member
Sep 17, 2012
1,403
254
In the land of ice and snow
✟10,164.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
I'm going to do my best not to sound like a whiny brat, but I really would love to hear some advice about being a good friend to someone.

This situation with a particular friend of mine revolves around my belief that she is far less invested in our friendship than I am. I know that some people have different ways of showing others that they care, but I also am aware that this person has done very little to show/tell me that I matter to her. I'm starting to feel taken for granted...perhaps because we've known each other for so long.
Often times I find that I'm constantly the one that's reaching out to her to talk or meet up, and so many times it feels like we have a one-sided friendship. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt - we've been friends for 12+ years - but it's starting to weigh heavily on my heart that she doesn't really care.

You might say that I should talk to her about how I'm feeling, but believe me we have had that conversation many times, and it hasn't really changed anything. I would gladly welcome any advice you might offer or a prayer for God's guidance in this situation. Thank you, and God bless!
 
Jul 19, 2012
128
2
✟15,268.00
Faith
Baptist
Marital Status
Private
I'm going to do my best not to sound like a whiny brat, but I really would love to hear some advice about being a good friend to someone.

This situation with a particular friend of mine revolves around my belief that she is far less invested in our friendship than I am. I know that some people have different ways of showing others that they care, but I also am aware that this person has done very little to show/tell me that I matter to her. I'm starting to feel taken for granted...perhaps because we've known each other for so long.
Often times I find that I'm constantly the one that's reaching out to her to talk or meet up, and so many times it feels like we have a one-sided friendship. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt - we've been friends for 12+ years - but it's starting to weigh heavily on my heart that she doesn't really care.

You might say that I should talk to her about how I'm feeling, but believe me we have had that conversation many times, and it hasn't really changed anything. I would gladly welcome any advice you might offer or a prayer for God's guidance in this situation. Thank you, and God bless!

I can understand where you are - and it's very frustrating. (And I don't think you're a whiny brat.) :p

Lord, please give our sister guidance and wisdom in dealing with her situation. Please show her if it is in your will for her to remain friends. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen. :prayer:
 
Upvote 0

Linus

Senior Veteran
Supporter
Oct 25, 2004
19,443
2,464
45
Stockholm
✟86,322.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
I understand where you are coming from.

My wife was in a similiar situation, she was the one that called 9/10 times, she was the one inviting her to stuff and so on. But when my wife began to call less, she began to initiate contact more.

Perhaps she is so accustomed to you taking the first steps that she doesn't think about it like you do.

Praying for guidance and your friendship in the name of Jesus Christ. Thank You Lord!
 
Upvote 0

Debby 24

Senior Veteran
Jul 20, 2010
3,149
241
Great Britain
✟14,863.00
Faith
Pentecostal
Marital Status
Married
Politics
UK-Conservative
I agree with Linus, because I have been in exact same situations in my life. Also exausting when someone keeps asking for advice and help and piles everything on to you but completely ignores everything you suggest and goes back to square one with the same problems and want you to listen to all their woes but are not interested in yours, want you to do all the running, worrying and caring, also want you to drop everything when they want to do something or see you. But will go weeks without even a call to see if your ok. You do all the inviting, giving meals etc.

Also I always had a problem saying no.

I am now trying to improve on how I handle these things by making sure I have other friends and interests, and always make sure friends know that my family come first without fail, which was another failing of mine I have now put right, and has made all the difference.

That they still know that I care about them, I do not drop them but keep it all in balance, if they have problems I make a point of praying with them about the problem taking it all to the Lord, keep showing love and being there when they in real need but keeping strong in keeping it all in balance. This is really working.

I will be praying for your friendship, for the Lord to bring peace and love wisdom and direction with how do handle your particular situation with love and care.

Praying. :prayer: :angel:
 
Upvote 0

paul becke

Regular Member
Supporter
Jul 12, 2003
4,011
814
83
Edinburgh, Scotland.
✟205,214.00
Faith
Catholic
Marital Status
Politics
UK-Labour
I have the impression that such people use you. But they don't really know the meaning of friendship and just use the other person as a convenience. It's not as bad as a purported friend some people have, who are actually spiteful towards them! For me, life is too short to have either type as a friend rather than an acquaintance.
 
Upvote 0

ThyLovingkindness

Senior Veteran
Feb 16, 2012
4,528
381
✟14,359.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Private
Ideally a friendship should be a give-and-take thing. And if one person is doing the bulk of the giving, with the other being nonchalant or *gasp* a taker, then really, the person doing all the giving needs to look at oneself. For it takes two to tango, meaning, the liaison can be a healthy and mutual exchange; or, in some cases, end up being some lop-sided semblance of a friendship. And in both cases, the parties involved bear responsibility as far as either making the relationship work, or letting go and walking away if it doesn't. Praying that you see your part in this scenario, and that you do what's right for you... yeah... take care of you. Blessings!
 
Upvote 0
Status
Not open for further replies.