Please help. I feel like I CANNOT truly believe & surrender. I’m terrified.

[Cookie1720]

I posted this on a struggling thread and someone suggested I post here. I need all the prayers I can get! I’ll start by saying I made a profession of faith when I was 11 years old. The only thing I can remember is being bothered and telling my parents. I don’t even remember our conversation but I’m sure they told me what I needed to do to be saved and just believe and I’m sure I said ok and I went before the church that same night right after. I don’t remember actually believing though. I do remember I still didn’t feel settled then and here I am 34 and I’m still not settled. I will say there was really only a few other times I was bothered more than a few days but I always said well I must be saved because of the time when I was 11 and pushed it aside. I feel terrible but I would want to avoid church when I could or avoid the Bible because it would cause me to be disturbed. For the past 8 weeks I have been living in agony. Terrified that the Lord will come back tomorrow. I think what if he comes back on Easter. My problem is I “feel” like everything is true.. God the creator, his son Jesus, resurrection, second coming but I cannot just say yes I 100% believe and surrender my doubt. I’ve read some things that say maybe you can’t be saved because you feel like God wronged you in your life or he’s let bad things happen. I don’t believe that. I’ve read something that says you don’t want to give up sin. That’s not me either. I don’t party, smoke, drugs, or things I feel I couldn’t give up. I want to live a Christian life. My problem is my natural mind has a hard time believing the supernatural of it all.. the resurrection or miracles or God the creator/know all. I “feel” it’s true but I have a hard time receiving that. I know it’s because our man minds can’t comprehend supernatural but that’s why I have a hard time believing. I also have anxiety and ocd. I read you can have religious ocd and I believe I have that. I keep going over and over things and I never feel like I can surrender and fully trust. I know there is all this evidence but yet I’m still struggling. I even been told the Bible is real so you can believe what’s in it but I struggle with that. I think why would all my family and friends tell me it’s true but I still can’t believe after that. Then I think there have archeology findings that support the Bible so why can’t I believe. Then there have been atheist who say even they were turned believer. I pray this can be me. I even recently read that if you don’t believe Christianity then what do you believe. Do you believe that everything could have just been so without a creator. The thing is I really don’t. I’ve always thought the first life obviously had to start with one being. Sometimes I feel like I believe but then I feel like I’m just trying to trick my mind that I believe and then other times I feel like I will never be able to surrender. I feel absolutely terrified. I want more than anything else to get this fixed. Again it’s like I feel it’s true. But then I feel like the reason I’m having a hard time fully believing is because it’s always been a familiar story but a hard one for me too understand. Almost like it’s the Easter bunny or Santa story as bad as that sounds but then if I didn’t believe at all then why else would I be so afraid to go to hell or to be left behind. I am so skeptical because of the supernatural aspects and my mind can’t grasp it or something. I know it’s because it’s a man mind but I don’t know what to do to change it. I read verses that are so discouraging that make me feel like I won’t be saved but then I’ll read some encouraging verses. I also know there are atheist who didn’t believe at all who have been saved so it gives me some hope. However I feel like time is running out. I pray God will have mercy on me. I pray he will give me Grace to be saved. Please please offer any help! I don’t know how to get off of the wheel of skepticism and doubt even when I have evidence before me. Please please help and please please pray for me.

 

[Benjamin Müller]

I know it’s because it’s a man mind but I don’t know what to do to change it.

Romans 8:7 “Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.”

John 14:26 "But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you."

Acts 2:38 "Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost."

1 Corinthians 2:11 For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God.

2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Luke 11:13 "If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

James 4:8 "Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded."

--

• Repent
• Be Baptized
• Receive the Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit Will:

• Lead You Into All Truth
• Help You Overcome Sin
• The Holy Spirit Doesn't Cause Us to Fear
  
• Give Us a Sound Mind

It sounds to me like God may be calling you into the truth. At 11 years old and not remembering much of your church-experience, doesn't necessarily mean you are "saved". God puts the age of reason at 20 and it's best to be baptized in one's late teens / twenties (depending on maturity level). We have to understand what we are getting into before we can make a covenant with God. But that doesn't mean God didn't acknowledge your church-experience and, though you were young and not ready for His work, took note of you and now being of better age and maturity is bringing you into His knowledge.

Of course that is for God to judge, not me, but to feel as you do is a good sign that God is working with you and has not left you and that he wants you.

I recommend seeking a minister and being counseled for baptism.

 

[Tolworth John]

problem is I “feel” like everything is true

Your problem is you ' feel ', where is your knowledge that it is true?

Have you read Lee strobes book ' the Case for Christ ' or studies the facts about the resurrection?

You also say you avoid attending church or reading the bible.
Start attending church each and every week.
Also regu read and study the bible, so you stop ' feeling ' and start knowing.

 

[Cookie1720]

I have recently watched one of his videos. I have not read his book but I am interested to.

I should have clarified that I have felt/wanted or maybe even have skipped out and avoided church sometimes but I have regularly attended church all my life. I have not however read my Bible. I would want to avoid these things as to not be bothered and deal with this head on. I’ve put it off which I think is part of my problem why I have such a hard time.

I have heard the word and know there is evidence and yet I still have something holding me back. That is why I feel so defeated. I am trying to seek him. I need many prayers and God to please have mercy and grace.

 

[Cookie1720]

Romans 8:7 “Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.”

John 14:26 "But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you."

Acts 2:38 "Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost."

1 Corinthians 2:11 For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God.

2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Luke 11:13 "If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!"

James 4:8 "Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded."

--

• Repent
• Be Baptized
• Receive the Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit Will:

• Lead You Into All Truth
• Help You Overcome Sin
• The Holy Spirit Doesn't Cause Us to Fear
  
• Give Us a Sound Mind

It sounds to me like God may be calling you into the truth. At 11 years old and not remembering much of your church-experience, doesn't necessarily mean you are "saved". God puts the age of reason at 20 and it's best to be baptized in one's late teens / twenties (depending on maturity level). We have to understand what we are getting into before we can make a covenant with God. But that doesn't mean God didn't acknowledge your church-experience and, though you were young and not ready for His work, took note of you and now being of better age and maturity is bringing you into His knowledge.

Of course that is for God to judge, not me, but to feel as you do is a good sign that God is working with you and has not left you and that he wants you.

I recommend seeking a minister and being counseled for baptism.

Thank you for your words. Please continue to pray for me.

 

[Benjamin Müller]

Thank you for your words. Please continue to pray for me.

I will Sorry I meant to post that I was praying for you in that post, but I guess my mind thought it and so I thought I wrote it, but I didn't.

*Hugs*

 

[Cookie1720]

Your problem is you ' feel ', where is your knowledge that it is true?

Have you read Lee strobes book ' the Case for Christ ' or studies the facts about the resurrection?

You also say you avoid attending church or reading the bible.
Start attending church each and every week.
Also regu read and study the bible, so you stop ' feeling ' and start knowing.

I have recently watched one of his videos. I have not read his book but I am interested to.

I should have clarified that I have felt/wanted or maybe even have skipped out and avoided church sometimes but I have regularly attended church all my life. I have not however read my Bible. I would want to avoid these things as to not be bothered and deal with this head on. I’ve put it off which I think is part of my problem why I have such a hard time.

I have heard the word and know there is evidence and yet I still have something holding me back. That is why I feel so defeated. I am trying to seek him. I have never really learned and studied as I should. I am hoping that is where I went wrong and with studying I can truly trust. I need many prayers and God to please have mercy and grace.

 

[Tolworth John]

have not however read my Bible. I would want to avoid these things as to not be bothered and deal with this head on.

Deal with it head on.

Avoiding the issue and worrying about it will not change anything.

Paul wrote about Olympic athletes going into Strict training, refering to how Christians should prepare themselves.

He talked about being a fully trained soldier and putting on the armour of God.

Get to work, start your training.

 

[PaulCanPat]

Your problem is you ' feel ', where is your knowledge that it is true?

Have you read Lee strobes book ' the Case for Christ ' or studies the facts about the resurrection?

You also say you avoid attending church or reading the bible.
Start attending church each and every week.
Also regu read and study the bible, so you stop ' feeling ' and start knowing.

I agree with this post. What totally convinced me of the truth of God's word was studying the book by Geisler and Nix, "Introduction to the Bible", which discusses how the Bible came to be and how true the Bible is. When I understood all of this, I was able to set aside my feelings and live by faith. It was wonderful to stabilize.

 

[onceEMT]

I posted this on a struggling thread and someone suggested I post here. I need all the prayers I can get! I’ll start by saying I made a profession of faith when I was 11 years old. The only thing I can remember is being bothered and telling my parents. I don’t even remember our conversation but I’m sure they told me what I needed to do to be saved and just believe and I’m sure I said ok and I went before the church that same night right after. I don’t remember actually believing though. I do remember I still didn’t feel settled then and here I am 34 and I’m still not settled. I will say there was really only a few other times I was bothered more than a few days but I always said well I must be saved because of the time when I was 11 and pushed it aside. I feel terrible but I would want to avoid church when I could or avoid the Bible because it would cause me to be disturbed. For the past 8 weeks I have been living in agony. Terrified that the Lord will come back tomorrow. I think what if he comes back on Easter. My problem is I “feel” like everything is true.. God the creator, his son Jesus, resurrection, second coming but I cannot just say yes I 100% believe and surrender my doubt. I’ve read some things that say maybe you can’t be saved because you feel like God wronged you in your life or he’s let bad things happen. I don’t believe that. I’ve read something that says you don’t want to give up sin. That’s not me either. I don’t party, smoke, drugs, or things I feel I couldn’t give up. I want to live a Christian life. My problem is my natural mind has a hard time believing the supernatural of it all.. the resurrection or miracles or God the creator/know all. I “feel” it’s true but I have a hard time receiving that. I know it’s because our man minds can’t comprehend supernatural but that’s why I have a hard time believing. I also have anxiety and ocd. I read you can have religious ocd and I believe I have that. I keep going over and over things and I never feel like I can surrender and fully trust. I know there is all this evidence but yet I’m still struggling. I even been told the Bible is real so you can believe what’s in it but I struggle with that. I think why would all my family and friends tell me it’s true but I still can’t believe after that. Then I think there have archeology findings that support the Bible so why can’t I believe. Then there have been atheist who say even they were turned believer. I pray this can be me. I even recently read that if you don’t believe Christianity then what do you believe. Do you believe that everything could have just been so without a creator. The thing is I really don’t. I’ve always thought the first life obviously had to start with one being. Sometimes I feel like I believe but then I feel like I’m just trying to trick my mind that I believe and then other times I feel like I will never be able to surrender. I feel absolutely terrified. I want more than anything else to get this fixed. Again it’s like I feel it’s true. But then I feel like the reason I’m having a hard time fully believing is because it’s always been a familiar story but a hard one for me too understand. Almost like it’s the Easter bunny or Santa story as bad as that sounds but then if I didn’t believe at all then why else would I be so afraid to go to hell or to be left behind. I am so skeptical because of the supernatural aspects and my mind can’t grasp it or something. I know it’s because it’s a man mind but I don’t know what to do to change it. I read verses that are so discouraging that make me feel like I won’t be saved but then I’ll read some encouraging verses. I also know there are atheist who didn’t believe at all who have been saved so it gives me some hope. However I feel like time is running out. I pray God will have mercy on me. I pray he will give me Grace to be saved. Please please offer any help! I don’t know how to get off of the wheel of skepticism and doubt even when I have evidence before me. Please please help and please please pray for me.

 

[onceEMT]

Dear Lord, Please bless Ms Cookie with faith. Let her know in the heart the Bible to be true, correct, and authoritative under all circumstances. Please allow her heart, with a seed of faith, to override the doubts coming from her mind. Please sooth the restlessness in her soul. Let Your loving arms wrap around her so tightly that she feels Your never ending passion. In Jesus Holy All Powerful Name, amen.