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Please help! Did I do the right thing?

Discussion in 'Serious Stuff' started by Squidward110, Apr 10, 2013.

  1. Squidward110

    Squidward110 Junior Member

    12
    +1
    Christian
    Single
    Hi everyone, I have a slightly long story here so bear with me. I am a 19 year old commuting college student. I was recently involved in an almost two year relationship with a girl whom I believed was my soul mate. Along our relationship I would catch her flirting (via messaging devices) other boys and flirting with them sometimes graphically. I was always heartbroken but eventually forgave her because I loved her. Around a month ago I found out that during our relationship she had cheated on me with 8 other guys. She had sexual relations with all of them. We lost our virginity to each other (a stupid mistake but I thought she was the one) so this crushed me because I always was faithful and avoided girls altogether. She claimed it was because I "didn't have time for her and it wasn't fair for her". I am extremely busy with school and I saw her at every opportunity I could manage. We didn't talk anymore. About a week ago I saw (through social media) that she has a new boyfriend already. I got very depressed and began comparing myself to this older, more attractive, manlier person. I prayed and prayed to ask what would help me and the only thing I could think if was "forgiveness"

    Here's where I need your guys advice. Yesterday I messaged her saying that even though she put me through a lot I have forgiven her because I believe it is what God would want me to do. She didn't hardly say anything. I wished her the best in her life and we haven't spoken again. I felt like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders but I'm still wondering if I really did the right thing. If you guys could give me your thoughts I'd really appreciate it!

    Thanks for reading that while thing and God Bless!
     
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  2. marc16

    marc16 Newbie

    107
    +10
    Forgive, but don't forget. Best you simply move on and find someone with your same values.
     
  3. joshiwoshi

    joshiwoshi Newbie

    18
    +1
    Yes, of course you did. She was treating you like trash for no reason. Move on and find a girl with faith. :)
     
  4. JezJ

    JezJ Newbie

    7
    +0
    Non-Denom
    Single
    If you feel like a weight was lifted off your shoulders, then you definitely did the right thing :).
    Don't let the devil make you second guess yourself.
     
  5. Joshua Breeze

    Joshua Breeze Member

    106
    +4
    Christian
    In Relationship
    UK-Conservative
    I understand where you are coming from competely. My advice to you is trust in God and let Him make the vital paths for you to take in your life. God knows what is going to be best for you.

    It appears to me as if her respect for you had gone so you maybe best to be out of the relationship.

    All the best. :amen:
     
  6. Spikey4672

    Spikey4672 A Man on a Mission

    61
    +10
    Protestant
    US-Republican
    I would like to say that man what you did there really inspired me. If any kind of consolation to you, your story has really influenced me. Its funny how God works like that. But yeah i would most certainly agree you did the right thing, but pain does leave scars that never fully heal. The best you can do is learn from your mistakes and use them for the better

    Good Luck and God bless
     
  7. Rhayven

    Rhayven Newbie

    107
    +7
    Christian
    You've made soul ties with her which is why you still think about her, it's hard bc little things will set it off. Eventually they will fade but you have to stay strong and look forward. I see that you are the same age as myself and I wish you the best. Just remember love is something to cherish. Keep it close and guard it well and one day you will have someone to share it with you! Good job on making the right decision!

    Rhay
     
  8. Pallas

    Pallas Doesn't hate you

    21
    +0
    Other Religion
    Private
    US-Democrat
    Whoa bro, don't forgive her for that. She put you through all of that, she deserves nothing but animosity from you. You can't let her get away with hurting you.
     
  9. rijames99

    rijames99 Junior Member

    15
    +0
    Other Religion
    What you did was absolutely. You showed her you were the bigger person and at the same time, lifted a heavy weight from your shoulders.
    Why do you question if it was the right thing to do?
    You weren't thinking of getting back with her, were you?

    btw, the excuse that she slept around because you didn't give her enough of her time is empty. If she was dissatisfied in the relationship with you and felt it couldn't be repaired, she should have ended it BEFORE having sex with other guys.
     
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