On this there is another perspective. For example, the Bible tells us to honor our parents and so should we limit our ourselves to honoring our parents or is it allowed to honor aunts and uncles? - rhetorical
The Bible says we are not to commit adultery . So does that mean we should completely ignore the opposite sex? - rhetorical
Of course I realize these things are ridiculous. So my point is; Because the Bible says we are to "consider it joy" when experiencing these things does that mean we are not allowed to simply acknowledge the existence of it? I don't think so.
I certainly would not be the one to tell a widow that had just witnessed her family brutally tortured, and then hacked to death with a machete, before she herself was gang raped that she was sinning because she was not singing praise songs and telling jokes.
The Bible also tells us to preserve life and that a husband is the shepherd of the family. In the above scenario would the man of the family be sinning if someone breaks in at night and he tried to stop them from hurting the family (rather than considering it joy)? The Bible tells us no - that is not a sin. And that the man is obligated to defend the family to the best of his ability.
When a soldier goes to war he can have a since of pride and "joy" for what he is doing - if it is a righteous cause. But that doesn't mean he should enjoy killing. If a soldier had "pride" or "joy" for what he was doing would he be sinning if he stepped on a land mine and instead of singing praise songs he was screaming in pain? No that wouldn't be a sin.
Not meaning to sound contentious with any of this. I am just saying that while I am in agreement with much of what you wrote, there does need to be some judicious application.
Ecclesiastes 3:2-8
2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.