People who believe that the bible mandates spanking: Do you believe that neurodivergent and special

[bible_follower]

People who believe that the bible mandates spanking: Do you believe that neurodivergent and special needs kids are exempt from spanking?

 

[Kevin Snow]

I heartily know and understand that spanking preserves the life of the child. I was spanked and deterred from every kind of wicked behavior that children so easily get entangled in. And I am very thankful now that I was. But beyond this, I understand wholeheartedly even more the struggle within special needs children as I am one myself! I have been autistic my entire life and have hidden it as best I could from people but I know and understand the struggle that special children need and indeed, they do deserve a spanking! They are no different from other children in regards to this and spanking is something they understand far better than the average child.

Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.
~Proverbs 13:24

And this is true for all sons.

 

[Celticroots]

It depends on the needs of the child. What disciplinary method works for one may not work for another.

 

[Acts2:38]

Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

Rod - שֵׁבֶט shêbeṭ, shay'-bet; from an unused root probably meaning to branch off; a scion, i.e. (literally) a stick (for punishing, writing, fighting, ruling, walking, etc.)

See also the MANY examples of God "disciplining" the children of Israel rather harshly. Wandering in the wilderness for 40 years until an entire generation dies off. Placing them in bondage repeatedly in which they endured cruel torments from the oppressors God allowed on them by the conqueror. Too much to list.

Hebrews 12
5 And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him:

6 For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.

7 If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?

8 But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.

9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?

10 For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness.

11 Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.

God approves of correction.

 

[dreadnought]

People who believe that the bible mandates spanking: Do you believe that neurodivergent and special needs kids are exempt from spanking?

Spanking is for a child's own good.

 

[*LILAC]

Did NOT work on our special needs child whatsoever. He has neurological disorders so there is no way that it is even fair to treat the special needs the same you would a neurotypical. I suggest you seek other ways to "discipline". Many times getting physical with them will ONLY make matter worse. Use words. Be creative. The special needs people are very vulnerable. Understand that.

 

[JAM2b]

Special needs children should never be spanked because it can often be hard to tell if their behaviors are something they are capable of controlling, and they also have the added need of extra instruction and guidance and support of learning how to manage their behaviors and communicate well. If you try to solve their behavior problems with punishment, they are going to miss out on the support and coping mechanisms they need to learn. When you're dealing with a child with these types of problems special behavioral plans are needed. It's not like disciplining a child with typical brain function and behavioral control.

They need redirection, goals, closer supervision, consistent routine and rules, prompts and cues, and a lot of proactivity from parents, caregivers, and teachers.

 

[ilovejcsog]

I have always been confused by the meaning of spare the rod and spoil child. People have told me it means the opposite and I always believed what it appears to be saying.
I have regretted terribly that I did not spare the rod and it ruined my children. If you can shower them with love then a love tap is not so bad once and a while. I believe it teaches them to be violent. It is physical abuse.

 

[God saves]

I am not a parent, and I don't know that the Bible mandates spanking, so I guess I am not the target audience this question is aimed at.

I believe that ALL children (who are all made in the image of God) must be guided in the way of the Lord, including children with disabilities (whatever type and severity of disability the child has). While I do not believe a disability defines a person , there are various types and degrees of disabilities which is something to be considered - for example if the child concerned appears to have/is diagnosed with a severe to profound intellectual disability and has severely limited formal language skills, I don't see why the question of spanking should even come into mind for that particular child. I believe that even if a child has been diagnosed with a severe intellectual disability, that particular child would still need to be trained up in the way of the Lord. I also think that for any child, it is important to help them understand why a certain behaviour is right and why a certain behaviour is wrong.

Some children may have developmental, neurological, medical and/or neurodegenerative disorders which may impact behavior, and I think that while guidance and discipline for children is crucial I believe that it is important that a child is being punished for something they can control and not for something they cannot. Basically the point I am trying to make is that there are different types and degrees of disability and that while children need disipline and guidance, I believe it should be provided in a way that is appropriate to the child's needs, and in a way that gives glory to God and helps the child.

 

[Hazelelponi]

I am a believer in the punishment fitting the crime, taking all things into account.

With special needs children you have to take into consideration their mental faculties, and how cognizant they are of what they did, and how a spanking would be understood.

A normal child you can swat their hand if they reach for (the umpteenth time) something you've told them no to having and they will connect the swat with your telling them no provided the swat immediately follows their action of reaching for the item you've already told them no to having.

You have to consider with a special needs child whether they can make that connection, whether they can understand an escalation in punishment comes from not minding etc.

It may not be appropriate and the parent knows the child best to determine this.

God didn't make it mandatory perse, it's just a highly recommended form of parenting to teach real consequences (which can sometimes hurt) for rule breaking from a young age because if you don't there are real life consequences when a child reaches adolescence and adulthood whose never been given boundaries or understood consequences. (And what God does with His children)

But that's not to say there aren't exceptions at times for the mentally challenged, although as one poster mentioned, it might still be considered if it can be understood.

 

[ChristianGirl_96]

No because I detest violence. My special needs child is paralyzed and I was born to a mom who taught me that hypocrisy was wrong. So I either scold or distract instead. I do not wish to teach them a inappropriate message as there are typically developing people who detest violence completely. I don't approve of hypocrisy at all so no violence. Plus it makes me a bad mom doesn't it?

 

[Hazelelponi]

No because I detest violence. My special needs child is paralyzed and I was born to a mom who taught me that hypocrisy was wrong. So I either scold or distract instead. I do not wish to teach them a inappropriate message as there are typically developing people who detest violence completely. I don't approve of hypocrisy at all so no violence. Plus it makes me a bad mom doesn't it?

I don't think its about hypocrisy at all. I'm not even sure what a special needs paralytic child could possibly do to warrant corporal punishment in the first place.

I mean, you still don't want to overly spoil the child as I'm sure there are still some kind of boundaries, but a "no" would suffice for such a child of it ever needed to be said...

I wouldn't worry about it at all. God gave you a gift in your child, and your instincts seem fine.

 

[Macchiato]

Did NOT work on our special needs child whatsoever. He has neurological disorders so there is no way that it is even fair to treat the special needs the same you would a neurotypical. I suggest you seek other ways to "discipline". Many times getting physical with them will ONLY make matter worse. Use words. Be creative. The special needs people are very vulnerable. Understand that.

I agree.

 

[timf]

Children need to learn about consequences. When our kids (with Aspergers) needed to get a consequence, we would offer three swats on the back of the hand with a paint stirrer (low mass so not able to do damage) or five minutes time out sitting on a chair. They would always choose the swats presumably because it was over quicker.