Pastor gets standing ovation for sexual sin against a woman, she is appalled

[majj27]

Define "abused".

You don't think what this guy did qualifies as abuse? Really?

 

[Brian Mcnamee]

Saw this in the New York Times. You know how Christians come clean with their past and how they've been redeemed?

Memphis Pastor Admits ‘Sexual Incident’ With High School Student 20 Years Ago

Of course, the crowd in the church he admitted this to cheered and gave him praise, however, the woman he sinned against (sexual assault), although this is many years later, turn him into the authorities just now after seeing his video and his congregation on YouTube.

She was in tears when saw this, and this was caused her to take action.

The situation he admitted to happened years ago in Texas when she was 17. He was a youth pastor at the time. The statute of limitations has run out.

But what is your opinion on this?

As a Christian, should he be rejoiced and cheered or be jeered?

Hi I think they cheered him not condoning of his sin but in support of where he has gone on since then. David committed adultery and had Uriah killed to cover up his sin and God called David out who openly repented and psalm 51 is a powerful song of repentance.
o the Chief Musician. A Psalm of David when Nathan the prophet went to him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba.
1 Have mercy upon me, O God,
According to Your lovingkindness;
According to the multitude of Your tender mercies,
Blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
And cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I acknowledge my transgressions,
And my sin is always before me.
4 Against You, You only, have I sinned,
And done this evil in Your sight—
That You may be found just when You speak,[fn]
And blameless when You judge.
5 Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
And in sin my mother conceived me.
6 Behold, You desire truth in the inward parts,
And in the hidden part You will make me to know wisdom.
7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
8 Make me hear joy and gladness,
That the bones You have broken may rejoice.
9 Hide Your face from my sins,
And blot out all my iniquities.
10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,
And renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me away from Your presence,
And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of Your salvation,
And uphold me by Your generous Spirit.
13 Then I will teach transgressors Your ways,
And sinners shall be converted to You.
14 Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,
The God of my salvation,
And my tongue shall sing aloud of Your righteousness.
15 O Lord, open my lips,
And my mouth shall show forth Your praise.
16 For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it;
You do not delight in burnt offering.
17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit,
A broken and a contrite heart—
These, O God, You will not despise.
18 Do good in Your good pleasure to Zion;
Build the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then You shall be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness,
With burnt offering and whole burnt offering;
Then they shall offer bulls on Your altar.

David afterwards was called a man after Gods own heart.

This man back then was an adult but her being 17 and him being 22 is borderline on age difference. He had to have courage to admit what he did openly and apologize for it. Many other people would have denied anything as at this point it is a he said she said sort of thing. He has obviously moved past this and she should too. Her bringing it up now seems a bit vengeful as the guy he is now is not the same guy from 20 years ago. I do not want to marginalize the past incident and dismiss it but we should always forgive others as Christ has also forgiven us. If she had this attitude she might have addressed the situation privately rather than publicly.

 

[WolfGate]

Where did you get that part ? Quote or link.

Nm got the relevant part. However he begged her for her silence instead of confessing what happened. Sounds more like concealing a crime than repenting.

I'm with you on that. Repentance is more than just apologizing in guilt and asking for forgiveness. He apologized and then asked her to help him avoid consequences for his sin.

For the congregations reaction, I give a big "whatever". No way they were applauding the sin - they were showing support for the confession that he made to all of them. In the moment, they were not going to be thinking about appearances or details of what had happened in the intervening years. They were reacting to a step they saw as a correct, though hard, one.

 

[majj27]

A handy excuse, you mean.

"Hey Marge, look at this news article about a pastor in a church in another state which is not of our denomination who did something shameful. Organized religion is all phony, just like I've been saying!"

Boy, that's a lot of jumps you're making there.

 

[Almost there]

You don't think what this guy did qualifies as abuse? Really?

Not so far. I thought they were consenting. Let me go back and re-read.

 

[Albion]

Boy, that's a lot of jumps you're making there.

I've seen it happen just that way too many times.

 

[majj27]

He has obviously moved past this and she should too. Her bringing it up now seems a bit vengeful as the guy he is now is not the same guy from 20 years ago. I do not want to marginalize the past incident and dismiss it but we should always forgive others as Christ has also forgiven us. If she had this attitude she might have addressed the situation privately rather than publicly.

And this right here is why so few sexual assaults are reported. This. Right. Here.

Also, as for the "just get over it already" advice, do you know someone who was the target of sexual assault? I mean, are you close to anyone, a dear friend, family member? I am. I am married to an abuse survivor. Telling someone to just "move past it" is very, very cruel. Please don't do that.

 

[Albion]

Not so far. I thought they were consenting. Let me go back and re-read.

Right. I believe that most of us replied to a blend of what was said in some of the posts plus what the linked article itself said, and we need to settle on one scenario before deciding most of that which we are discussing.

 

[WolfGate]

Not so far. I thought they were consenting. Let me go back and re-read.

Other articles, including this one, have more detail. If details are true, given his position of authority, clearly abuse.

Memphis Megachurch Stands By Pastor Accused Of Sexually Assaulting Teenager

 

[Albion]

And this right here is why so few sexual assaults are reported. This. Right. Here.

Also, as for the "just get over it already" advice, do you know someone who was the target of sexual assault?

I didn't see any "just get over it" advice being offered.

 

[JackRT]

Most pastors probably would have done something like you outlined, but IMHO the part of the matter that's not so easily assessed concerns the response given by the congregation.

Maybe this is what happens when the congregation invests superstar status in a pastor.

 

[Favourofone]

If she had this attitude she might have addressed the situation privately rather than publicly.

Perhaps you missed the part where she mailed him and waited a month for an answer that he never sent before going public ?

 

[WolfGate]

This man back then was an adult but her being 17 and him being 22 is borderline on age difference. He had to have courage to admit what he did openly and apologize for it. Many other people would have denied anything as at this point it is a he said she said sort of thing. He has obviously moved past this and she should too. Her bringing it up now seems a bit vengeful as the guy he is now is not the same guy from 20 years ago. I do not want to marginalize the past incident and dismiss it but we should always forgive others as Christ has also forgiven us. If she had this attitude she might have addressed the situation privately rather than publicly.

Did you even read the articles and all the "private" ways she tried to address it that went nowhere? And FWIW, you did just marginalize the past incident by saying it shouldn't bother her and by saying the victim should take the lead from their abuser and move past.

 

[Almost there]

You don't think what this guy did qualifies as abuse? Really?

I just read her email:

Do you remember that night that you were supposed to drive me home from church and instead drove me to a deserted back road and sexually assaulted me?
Do you remember how you acted like you loved me and cared about me in order for me to cooperate in such acts, only to run out of the vehicle later and fall to your knees begging for forgiveness and for me not to tell anyone what had just happened?

Reading that email solidified my position.

I see her as the problem here. even if he didn't repent. What, exactly was the reason for the email? She even says right in that email that he fell on his knees and asked for forgiveness. And when she said he "sexually assaulted" her, that is just a label, like saying a store "ripped you off". Did they take money out of your wallet, or did they sell you an item at an agreed to price and later regretted the purchase and found out that the store down the street sold it for less.

"Sexual assault" is a legal term, but she has not provided proof that the label applies to what happened that night, 20 years ago.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. i.e. she would have been much better off to drop it at this particular time, 20 years later.

 

[A71]

Good God. It says it all really. Man abuses woman, gets put on the spot, cobbles up confession, and congregation laps it all up.
Vomit inducing.

This congregation is a prime example of the type primed and ready for strong delusion.

 

[Favourofone]

He has obviously moved past this and she should too.

Post 22

I didn't see any "just get over it" advice being offered.

 

[Almost there]

And this right here is why so few sexual assaults are reported. This. Right. Here.

Also, as for the "just get over it already" advice, do you know someone who was the target of sexual assault? I mean, are you close to anyone, a dear friend, family member? I am. I am married to an abuse survivor. Telling someone to just "move past it" is very, very cruel. Please don't do that.

That's actually good advice if it happened 20 years ago.

 

[Favourofone]

I see her as the problem here.

One reason not to let your daughter near youth pastors or whatever.

 

[Favourofone]

That's actually good advice if it happened 20 years ago.

Is that what you would tell your wife if it had been her 20 years ago ?

 

[Almost there]

Right. I believe that most of us replied to a blend of what was said in some of the posts plus what the linked article itself said, and we need to settle on one scenario before deciding most of that which we are discussing.

Well, I read it and the email. I applaud what he did and consider her to be another of a long list of women that seem to feel the time is right to accuse men of long lost crimes that may or may not have taken place the way they describe them, or at all.

And her response to his repentance is perplexing. May I assume she does not identify as a Christian?

What prompts an email like that, 20 years after the fact? Enquiring minds want to know.