I have been praying to God to address any unresolved hurts and emotional pain at their root and at their core. I have been reading Christian books about spiritual warfare and praying against the spirit of rejection for example. I believe that God is probably answering my prayers, just not in the way I expected. I am serious about getting well and becoming whole. I watched a movie on PureFlix last night called Clancy. I cried at the end. I am usually not able to cry. I have been feeling heavy hearted off and on for months and years even, yet unable to cry. After going to bed last night, I woke up in the middle of the night remembering another movie that I saw 24 years ago that caused me to have a similar reaction. I don't think I shed tears when I saw it, but it got buried in my subconscious. Now that I remember seeing the end of the movie like it was yesterday, I have been crying off and on all day. It's not just about the movie! The sad movie I saw 24 years ago has triggered unresolved grief. I was going through same hard times and also struggling with sexual sin with an abusive boyfriend whom I was madly in love with at the time I watched the movie. Old wounds have been opened up. I trust that Jesus is soothing my hurts with his healing balm and that I will come out better on the other side. I want to heal so that I can serve my Lord and reach out and help others stricken by grief.