online dating

[mina]

I'm not against it. I think you have to be really careful. I've gone back and forth about it. and even considered signing up for one of the big sites just to look and see what it was all about. But they never would send me registration info. One thing i was "afraid" of- there were several guys in my real life that liked me a little too much, like in a creepy sort of stalker way, they didn't really even try to get to know me- they just followed me around- sometimes in scary and often uncomfortable situations, this happened more than once. One of them was on a dating site and I was concerned that he or all of them were on several and would use that as a means or a sign that we were meant to be to together if they found my profile; since we live in the same town and I assume you have to put what area you live in. So I was paranoid about that. But it never worked out and I met someone so i guess it worked out for the best.
So I think they are just another way to meet people.

 

[penNpaper]

have you done it? what were your experiences?

if you haven't, would you be open to it? why or why not?

Yes I have. My experiences are 50-50. My last relationship it was a good healthy Godly experience and each one I learn something new about myself, something to improve, realization moments, and something for me to do better on when I do get involved again. Some I regret, some I look back and say I did everything I could, it is the way you look at it. I try to focus on a positive viewpoint, and on the days that I go "meh" I try to tell myself why this or that relationship failed and so on. Pretty much the last 5 years the Lord put me in a ride that has changed my life 180 degrees and makes it clear where my focus and direction should be right now.

I've seen the online dating thing worked for peeps like the CF married couple Mel and Kirk uh huh

So I'm not against the concept sometimes church peeps are like "your in a online relationship" okkkkk look and attitude which I don't like because the Lord can do anything so don't be limiting the Lord now

Would I be open to it again, I dunno really. Right now I'm taking a break on relationships and women and putting my focus more on the Lord and for Him to direct my life more and give me direction. Maybe I will meet my future wifey at college, internship program, or at church for all that I know who knows on CF. But for right now I'm not worried about it.

The big problem with LDR is the fact that you just can't give your SO a hug, or a kiss, or go out to dinner, or watch a movie on the couch on a Friday night, so the whole waiting to be together can indeed hurt and kill an LDR if two peeps aren't fully committed in the relationship, give it to the Lord, and to established a healthy communication, honest, and trust between each other

Right now I'm turned off with the whole LDR online dating thing. Because the Drewski wants a lover's hug and maybe a kiss ya know the real kind

Is anyone taking notes?

God Bless,
Drew

 

[Luther073082]

I have a really good experience with dating someone I met online. Specifically someone I met on CF. . .

I forget how that one turned out. . . Oh yeah it turned out something like this.

 

[penNpaper]

I have a really good experience with dating someone I met online. Specifically someone I met on CF. . .

I forget how that one turned out. . . Oh yeah it turned out something like this.

Your gonna get Reps for this post

I remember when there was a gal maycontainnuts and that Luther fellow I always knew back in 2007 that you guys would make a lovely couple

God Bless,
Drew

 

[Blank123]

So I'm not against the concept sometimes church peeps are like "your in a online relationship" okkkkk look and attitude which I don't like because the Lord can do anything so don't be limiting the Lord now

haha thats true. I remember with my ex, anytime i tried to explain how we met, i'd get "the look" drove me crazy. One woman, even after hearing that we'd been dating for a year at that time, was convinced he was probably a rapist or something because we met online

The big problem with LDR is the fact that you just can't give your SO a hug, or a kiss, or go out to dinner, or watch a movie on the couch on a Friday night, so the whole waiting to be together can indeed hurt and kill an LDR if two peeps aren't fully committed in the relationship, give it to the Lord, and to established a healthy communication, honest, and trust between each other

Right now I'm turned off with the whole LDR online dating thing. Because the Drewski wants a lover's hug and maybe a kiss ya know the real kind

Is anyone taking notes?

God Bless,
Drew

yeah thats definitely a challenge. Its worth it though if its the right person, but i'm the same way. when i'm in love with someone i want to be able to see them on a regular basis and I need to be able to hug him or kiss him. There's really nothing better than being in the arms of the man you love, heh.

I'm not against it. I think you have to be really careful. I've gone back and forth about it. and even considered signing up for one of the big sites just to look and see what it was all about. But they never would send me registration info. One thing i was "afraid" of- there were several guys in my real life that liked me a little too much, like in a creepy sort of stalker way, they didn't really even try to get to know me- they just followed me around- sometimes in scary and often uncomfortable situations, this happened more than once. One of them was on a dating site and I was concerned that he or all of them were on several and would use that as a means or a sign that we were meant to be to together if they found my profile; since we live in the same town and I assume you have to put what area you live in. So I was paranoid about that. But it never worked out and I met someone so i guess it worked out for the best.
So I think they are just another way to meet people.

oo yeah, that wouldn't be a good situation at all. It would certainly make me think twice too.

actually after my break-up when i was getting ready to move on and meet someone new i did sign up to a couple of sites, nothing ever came out of it. and I am thinking about deleting my profiles now. but it has weirded me out, I don't know what i'd do if i were at work some night and some guy walked up to me and said, "I just saw your profile on _____!!!"

I have a really good experience with dating someone I met online. Specifically someone I met on CF. . .

I forget how that one turned out. . . Oh yeah it turned out something like this.

 

[penNpaper]

haha thats true. I remember with my ex, anytime i tried to explain how we met, i'd get "the look" drove me crazy. One woman, even after hearing that we'd been dating for a year at that time, was convinced he was probably a rapist or something because we met online

My family approved of it and some of my friends were happy for me too so it all depends on the person I guess. But yeah some church folk get all "oh you are dating online" something is wrong with you (or) "online equals death" look and attitude crap. I'm like it is the 21st century people it is considered "normal" to meet new friends online as well as married and met online situation. It isn't a crime or a sin now. There are some awesome peeps on CF and I won't have met if I didn't join this site.

yeah thats definitely a challenge. Its worth it though if its the right person, but i'm the same way. when i'm in love with someone i want to be able to see them on a regular basis and I need to be able to hug him or kiss him. There's really nothing better than being in the arms of the man you love, heh.

Plus you can't read their body language and tell if they are really telling you the truth or not. Because I can say "No, I'm fine" and be depressed or "I'm great" when I'm not...when its online you can get miss understood and so on.

God Bless,
Drew

 

[BRISH]

]have you done it?
Sort of. We just happen to meet online, but not through some dating site. It was one of those out of the blue blessing type things.

what were your experiences?
Heartbreaking. I gained a really good friend out of it. We both learned that there are other types of people in the world other than what we had experienced in our own lives. Both of our situations did not accomodate the opportunity to be together geographically, and with both having kids neither one of us would ever expect the other to jeopordize that. That was about 3 yrs ago, and it has set into place a pretty strict rule for myself that I hold. Explaination below:

if you haven't, would you be open to it?
why or why not?
I would be open to something, but it would have to be nothing but God slamming me with a "This is God and here's how you will do it" sign. Other than that, I don't encourage/look for situations (online) that open up doors to dating. My personal situation is a different one in that I can't move very far from here and rightfully so, for my kids. I do believe anything is possible, but I also firmly stand on the fact that we were born with sound minds. In other words, I've learned that you can meet soo many great and wonderful people online, but for me and my situation.....it's just not emotionally productive 99% of the time and I avoid it. It can happen? But I haven't and I'm not going to try to make it happen. This is just my situation, but in general for single folks without kids...GO FOR IT! You still need to be cautious, but the internet is the new phone. It's just how we communicat now and I see nothing wrong with meeting people this way. "It's totally awesome".

 

[toastface_grillah]

I'm giving the "online dating thing" a try right now. Sort of. I came across a girl on a dating site where I have a profile who's head over heels for Christ, lives 10 minutes away from Manhattan, is a 94% match for me (96% friend match), and is kind of a knockout.
So I answered a ton of her "must know about potential match" questions, and finally sent her a short email about wanting to get to know her over the summer. Here goes hoping and praying she checks her account and likes what she sees.

 

[holdenman84]

I have tried it for a while, have'nt met anyone, so Id rather meet that special lady in person, so I'm leaving it in God's very capable hands.

 

[Tink]

I met Timothy on plentyoffish.com and I'd say it's working out alrightl so far.

 

[LadyOfMystery]

My brother and his wife met online, and one of my close friends met his future wife online.

I have dated a few guys online, there are plenty of ways to make it mroe realistic or whatever you'd like to call it. Talk/text on the phone, skype watch a movie on skype as well, read the same books, watch the same movies etc. I find it pretty interesting to date long distance because I get to learn about a guy from the inside out, because sure you can see pics, but you really get to learn about what a guy thinks when you're dating him like that. I would definitely do it again.
I've also tried plentyoffish, met a really nice guy and went out on a date with him. It didn't work out tho, not because we met online we just weren't right for each other. But I'd try plentyoffish again soon, and am planning on it since Im moving to a new place.

 

[penNpaper]

My brother and his wife met online, and one of my close friends met his future wife online.

I have dated a few guys online, there are plenty of ways to make it mroe realistic or whatever you'd like to call it. Talk/text on the phone, skype watch a movie on skype as well, read the same books, watch the same movies etc. I find it pretty interesting to date long distance because I get to learn about a guy from the inside out, because sure you can see pics, but you really get to learn about what a guy thinks when you're dating him like that. I would definitely do it again.
I've also tried plentyoffish, met a really nice guy and went out on a date with him. It didn't work out tho, not because we met online we just weren't right for each other. But I'd try plentyoffish again soon, and am planning on it since Im moving to a new place.

Good insight Jennie

God Bless,
Drew

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

I've tried it. I joined a free Christian site and even met the guy and went on a date with him. Didn't work out though sadly.

God later convicted me and I got rid of my profile. I haven't been on one since and unless He gives me the go ahead then I won't get back on.

I have been rather tempted here lately to return though. . .A part of me says it's the only way I'm gonna meet someone since I basically have no social life.

 

[Wren]

I have done online dating if you count dating guys who I originally met through CF Singles. Otherwise, I have profiles on some dating sites, but they are all inactive and I've never gone out with anyone from those sites.

I think online dating is fantastic. Unless you are in college (and college-aged) it's really hard to meet people. I hear people say that you can/should meet someone in church, but have they attended church lately? I've been to several in the past few years and single males above 23 (and below 50) are a rare find...at least in my area.

 

[BRISH]

I hear people say that you can/should meet someone in church, but have they attended church lately?

Sorry, just wanted to say that that was diet coke out-tha-nose worthy.


I mean, yeah....you're more than likely going to find someone of the same mindset there. BUT, ~shrug~ it's kind of the same as anywhere else. (It's a toss up) Now functions outside of church that are christian based, that's a bit different and the variety tis more varied. Not to mention there's gong to be more social time included.


It's difficult though looking around me here, this age group.....I just don't see it. I think 10 years ago it was a weird thing to find someone online. Nowadays though, the internet is soo common place and a part of our every day lives. The world has grown folks, so needs to grow it's communication. To me, it's just like bumping into someone at the store. There are some different aspects, but hello...God can work through internet too.

I know two couples , well possibly a couple more that the online dating worked out perfectly. It took them realizing that they weren't going to find "the one" on the first try, but they eventually found each other. Awww....The one friend that it didnt work out for led to a year of therapy, but hey....4 out of 5 aint bad.

 

[Amber.ly]

I wouldn't have a problem meeting someone online and then choosing to date them. I have no issues with long distance relationships. More work and frustration but uniquely rewarding.

I am not going to join a dating site though. My sis did a few years ago when she hit the freak out zone of "oh my gosh, I'm 21 and have never dated, aaahhhhh!!!!!!" so she joined eHarmony. Several bizarre, creepy and obscene emails/matches later- she quit and now that is what I associate dating sites with LOL

But I'm still weighing my options of being a single old lady who collects porcelain cats

I hear people say that you can/should meet someone in church, but have they attended church lately? I've been to several in the past few years and single males above 23 (and below 50) are a rare find...at least in my area.

Totally true for me also

 

[Rory]

Hmmm, thinking I might need to get to church, the way ya'all make it sound lol

 

[broken_one]

I'm getting to the point where my anxiety isn't holding me back (from basically anything...it's almost non-existent), but now I'm very lazy about going to church. I just don't like the situation there, and what's going on makes me feel even blacker than I usually am.

 

[toastface_grillah]

I have been rather tempted here lately to return though. . .A part of me says it's the only way I'm gonna meet someone since I basically have no social life.

Sorry to hear; that's gotta be really frustrating. Have you thought much about/looked into volunteering? Who knows whether or not you'll find Mr. Right or even Mr. Dateable Right Now there, but he could only be a friend of a friend away.

I think online dating is fantastic. Unless you are in college (and college-aged) it's really hard to meet people. I hear people say that you can/should meet someone in church, but have they attended church lately? I've been to several in the past few years and single males above 23 (and below 50) are a rare find...at least in my area.

Love this. When I was in VT, single, post high-school females were as common as skyscrapers.

Sorry, just wanted to say that that was diet coke out-tha-nose worthy.


I mean, yeah....you're more than likely going to find someone of the same mindset there. BUT, ~shrug~ it's kind of the same as anywhere else. (It's a toss up) Now functions outside of church that are christian based, that's a bit different and the variety tis more varied. Not to mention there's gong to be more social time included.


It's difficult though looking around me here, this age group.....I just don't see it. I think 10 years ago it was a weird thing to find someone online. Nowadays though, the internet is soo common place and a part of our every day lives. The world has grown folks, so needs to grow it's communication. To me, it's just like bumping into someone at the store. There are some different aspects, but hello...God can work through internet too.

I know two couples , well possibly a couple more that the online dating worked out perfectly. It took them realizing that they weren't going to find "the one" on the first try, but they eventually found each other. Awww....The one friend that it didnt work out for led to a year of therapy, but hey....4 out of 5 aint bad.

And I liked your comment, too - but you might wanna watch it with that Diet Coke - for your keyboard's sake! As for meeting people off the interwebs 10 years ago, I was an early adopter.

 

[Blank123]

I'm giving the "online dating thing" a try right now. Sort of. I came across a girl on a dating site where I have a profile who's head over heels for Christ, lives 10 minutes away from Manhattan, is a 94% match for me (96% friend match), and is kind of a knockout.
So I answered a ton of her "must know about potential match" questions, and finally sent her a short email about wanting to get to know her over the summer. Here goes hoping and praying she checks her account and likes what she sees.

aw yay! i hope it works out

My brother and his wife met online, and one of my close friends met his future wife online.

I have dated a few guys online, there are plenty of ways to make it mroe realistic or whatever you'd like to call it. Talk/text on the phone, skype watch a movie on skype as well, read the same books, watch the same movies etc. I find it pretty interesting to date long distance because I get to learn about a guy from the inside out, because sure you can see pics, but you really get to learn about what a guy thinks when you're dating him like that. I would definitely do it again.
I've also tried plentyoffish, met a really nice guy and went out on a date with him. It didn't work out tho, not because we met online we just weren't right for each other. But I'd try plentyoffish again soon, and am planning on it since Im moving to a new place.

yeah, thats one thing i liked about it when i was dating my ex. you get to focus on the person a lot more easily than offline where the physical could very well blind you to things you might miss. its something of a different dynamic online.

I have done online dating if you count dating guys who I originally met through CF Singles. Otherwise, I have profiles on some dating sites, but they are all inactive and I've never gone out with anyone from those sites.

I think online dating is fantastic. Unless you are in college (and college-aged) it's really hard to meet people. I hear people say that you can/should meet someone in church, but have they attended church lately? I've been to several in the past few years and single males above 23 (and below 50) are a rare find...at least in my area.

yep. And even in the church, the kind of guy i would click with is a very rare breed indeed. i kind of feel like searching for a needle in a haystack online and offline though because of that so i'm open to both. I'll just trust God's judgment for which one He wants to use, if He chooses one at all

I wouldn't have a problem meeting someone online and then choosing to date them. I have no issues with long distance relationships. More work and frustration but uniquely rewarding.

I am not going to join a dating site though. My sis did a few years ago when she hit the freak out zone of "oh my gosh, I'm 21 and have never dated, aaahhhhh!!!!!!" so she joined eHarmony. Several bizarre, creepy and obscene emails/matches later- she quit and now that is what I associate dating sites with LOL

But I'm still weighing my options of being a single old lady who collects porcelain cats



Totally true for me also

i tried eharmony. there were maybe three guys out of the 250 some odd guys they matched me with i actually wanted to talk to. one rejected the match after going through our first stage of asking questions and the must haves/can't stands stuff. one actually did start talking to me; he added me to his FB and everything and disappeared quite suddenly and deleted me off his friends list with no explanation. the last one i don't think is active and never got a chance to talk to him before my account expired. I s'ppose i might try sending him a message the next free weekend if i think of it, but I'm not counting on much.

so yes, i'm seeing the benefits of becoming a cat lady as well with each passing day