OCD or God's will?

[steelcityd]

Is it possible to have obsessive, intrusive thoughts centered on themes such as God's will and a sense of direction?

I think this is what I've been struggling with for some time. It's really tough because these thoughts/impressions cause me to feel really uneasy about where I'm at in life even though I know that I'm in a good place. It makes it pretty close to impossible to find contentment in the present, regardless of what I'm doing. I say this in regard to where I'm living, my employment, and working on completing my degree. I know I'm not living in a way that dishonors God or anything like that. Having said this, I can see a pattern throughout my life where I'll think God is "calling me to a deeper level of surrender" or "sacrifice" and I'll obsess about whatever this course of action is until I finally "surrender" to whatever it may be. It's like my mind will just continue to obsess and ruminate and even make plans about whatever this course of action may be - even when I do not want to be thinking about these things... It's usually an Abraham and Issac scenario where I've got to "prove my love and devotion to God" in some new or extreme way. This could include selling what little possessions I may own, completely relocating, dropping out of my classes in school, etc. The list could go on. I hope you all get the point. The problem with all this is that when I've "followed through" and "surrendered" to these strong impressions (what I used to think was the Holy Spirit) there has never been any lasting peace or joy afterward. Usually only disappointment and disillusionment because I found that A) I didn't really feel better afterwards (maybe a temporary sense of release because I felt like I finally "surrendered") and B) There is always some new thing I've got to "surrender" which creates an entirely new obsession centered on the same thing.

I left all this as general as possible. I'm hoping some of you can relate to this kind of thinking. Your kind responses are welcome and appreciated. God bless you today

 

[Brotherly Spirit]

Hello steelcityd, yes it's something many if not all struggle to understand. Never easy knowing certainly if God is the one speaking to us or something else causing thoughts and feelings.

What I've learned is be patient to not react such as "Oh it's God, I must do this or that!". The first reaction isn't always what we do, it's what we think. Thankfully the best friend of patience is humility knowing we don't know, what we do know is usually uncertain and confuses us, so it helps to focus where you do know and go from there.

As for the Holy Spirit we must be careful not to separate him from God, we have the Bible and the Church which are inspired and inspirited. Those are the places we go or come to for knowledge and understanding, just as you have here. Always best to double check with the Lord getting support and advice spiritually as well as in all areas of your life; having wise counsel.

Motivations and expectations certainly influence us for better or worse. Jesus said couple things, "I desire mercy, not sacrifice" and "First clean the inside of the cup and dish, so the outside may become clean as well". How we know if we're in spirit and not the flesh is by the Spirit within us, which is known by it's fruits through us in our lives. One of the fruits of the Spirit is love and another is self-control, are you doing something for the love of God or in His love for the love of another? Also I think about self-control as moderation, instead of reacting and rushing to answer His call why not try responding and talking with Him?

As Christians we're to approach God having a personal relationship with the Lord, this means mutual development and growth in the Holy Spirit. When He calls, yes you answer, but the content of the call and answer is what's said between you and Him having a meaningful conversation. For further consideration, again checking with others about it. After all you can do is have faith to follow, not for personal satisfaction or better life, but the will and good of God.

God bless you too!

Is it possible to have obsessive, intrusive thoughts centered on themes such as God's will and a sense of direction?

I think this is what I've been struggling with for some time. It's really tough because these thoughts/impressions cause me to feel really uneasy about where I'm at in life even though I know that I'm in a good place. It makes it pretty close to impossible to find contentment in the present, regardless of what I'm doing. I say this in regard to where I'm living, my employment, and working on completing my degree. I know I'm not living in a way that dishonors God or anything like that. Having said this, I can see a pattern throughout my life where I'll think God is "calling me to a deeper level of surrender" or "sacrifice" and I'll obsess about whatever this course of action is until I finally "surrender" to whatever it may be. It's like my mind will just continue to obsess and ruminate and even make plans about whatever this course of action may be - even when I do not want to be thinking about these things... It's usually an Abraham and Issac scenario where I've got to "prove my love and devotion to God" in some new or extreme way. This could include selling what little possessions I may own, completely relocating, dropping out of my classes in school, etc. The list could go on. I hope you all get the point. The problem with all this is that when I've "followed through" and "surrendered" to these strong impressions (what I used to think was the Holy Spirit) there has never been any lasting peace or joy afterward. Usually only disappointment and disillusionment because I found that A) I didn't really feel better afterwards (maybe a temporary sense of release because I felt like I finally "surrendered") and B) There is always some new thing I've got to "surrender" which creates an entirely new obsession centered on the same thing.

I left all this as general as possible. I'm hoping some of you can relate to this kind of thinking. Your kind responses are welcome and appreciated. God bless you today

 

[steelcityd]

Hello steelcityd, yes it's something many if not all struggle to understand. Never easy knowing certainly if God is the one speaking to us or something else causing thoughts and feelings.

What I've learned is be patient to not react such as "Oh it's God, I must do this or that!". The first reaction isn't always what we do, it's what we think. Thankfully the best friend of patience is humility knowing we don't know, what we do know is usually uncertain and confuses us, so it helps to focus where you do know and go from there.

As for the Holy Spirit we must be careful not to separate him from God, we have the Bible and the Church which are inspired and inspirited. Those are the places we go or come to for knowledge and understanding, just as you have here. Always best to double check with the Lord getting support and advice spiritually as well as in all areas of your life; having wise counsel.

Motivations and expectations certainly influence us for better or worse. Jesus said couple things, "I desire mercy, not sacrifice" and "First clean the inside of the cup and dish, so the outside may become clean as well". How we know if we're in spirit and not the flesh is by the Spirit within us, which is known by it's fruits through us in our lives. One of the fruits of the Spirit is love and another is self-control, are you doing something for the love of God or in His love for the love of another? Also I think about self-control as moderation, instead of reacting and rushing to answer His call why not try responding and talking with Him?

As Christians we're to approach God having a personal relationship with the Lord, this means mutual development and growth in the Holy Spirit. When He calls, yes you answer, but the content of the call and answer is what's said between you and Him having a meaningful conversation. For further consideration, again checking with others about it. After all you can do is have faith to follow, not for personal satisfaction or better life, but the will and good of God.

God bless you too!

Thank you for this insight Brothery Spirit. I should note that I have been seeing a Christian counselor who seems to agree with what you just said in the sense that anything we do for God should stem from our relationship with Him. It should be out of love for God, not just a sense of obligation. He also understands the nature of OCD and that it tends to latch on to what we care about most and create doubt where there doesn't need to be any. In my case, serving God in the way He would want me to and finding His will for my life.

I think a lot of my motivation has been fear of punishment or consequence for not doing whatever I may be obsessing over at a given time. My counselor has encouraged me to focus on God's great love for me in this time and not necessarily whether or not I'm in the right place, because first and foremost, I'm in the right relationship.

 

[Brotherly Spirit]

Thank you for this insight Brothery Spirit. I should note that I have been seeing a Christian counselor who seems to agree with what you just said in the sense that anything we do for God should stem from our relationship with Him. It should be out of love for God, not just a sense of obligation. He also understands the nature of OCD and that it tends to latch on to what we care about most and create doubt where there doesn't need to be any. In my case, serving God in the way He would want me to and finding His will for my life.

I think a lot of my motivation has been fear of punishment or consequence for not doing whatever I may be obsessing over at a given time. My counselor has encouraged me to focus on God's great love for me in this time and not necessarily whether or not I'm in the right place, because first and foremost, I'm in the right relationship.

Thank you too for opening yourself to us. It's not easy sharing what's personal with people. That's good, it's ideal having someone regularly who understands both (being a Christian and a counselor). Me too, I think the cause of us to be OCD about God is our confusion of what it means to fear the Lord. It helps when I remind myself the meaning is to come with humility of needing, but also accepting His mercy. The kind of fear acknowledging His grace and glory as our God, remembering and welcoming Him into our lives every day.

 

[JesusisKing77]

I feel the exact same way,it’s nice knowing that there are others going trough the same stuff we go trough,like we are not alone

 

[Mari17]

Is it possible to have obsessive, intrusive thoughts centered on themes such as God's will and a sense of direction?

I think this is what I've been struggling with for some time. It's really tough because these thoughts/impressions cause me to feel really uneasy about where I'm at in life even though I know that I'm in a good place. It makes it pretty close to impossible to find contentment in the present, regardless of what I'm doing. I say this in regard to where I'm living, my employment, and working on completing my degree. I know I'm not living in a way that dishonors God or anything like that. Having said this, I can see a pattern throughout my life where I'll think God is "calling me to a deeper level of surrender" or "sacrifice" and I'll obsess about whatever this course of action is until I finally "surrender" to whatever it may be. It's like my mind will just continue to obsess and ruminate and even make plans about whatever this course of action may be - even when I do not want to be thinking about these things... It's usually an Abraham and Issac scenario where I've got to "prove my love and devotion to God" in some new or extreme way. This could include selling what little possessions I may own, completely relocating, dropping out of my classes in school, etc. The list could go on. I hope you all get the point. The problem with all this is that when I've "followed through" and "surrendered" to these strong impressions (what I used to think was the Holy Spirit) there has never been any lasting peace or joy afterward. Usually only disappointment and disillusionment because I found that A) I didn't really feel better afterwards (maybe a temporary sense of release because I felt like I finally "surrendered") and B) There is always some new thing I've got to "surrender" which creates an entirely new obsession centered on the same thing.

I left all this as general as possible. I'm hoping some of you can relate to this kind of thinking. Your kind responses are welcome and appreciated. God bless you today

Absolutely sounds like OCD. I've had similar struggles and know of others who have too. It sounds like you have a solid foundation for knowing how to deal with it though, and the insights that you've posted from you and your counselor sound spot on. I don't know if you've ever checked out the website ocdandchristianity.com, but I highly recommend it. I'll post a link to a relevant article below. Also, feel free to join the Facebook community "Christianity and Anxiety Disorders." It has many people with OCD, and some of them have very similar obsessions. You're in good company!

Don't know if I completely agree with everything in this article, but I found it very helpful for dealing with my OCD: http://ocdandchristianity.com/?p=610