New Season of Lonliness

JAM2b

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I don't feel comfortable sharing the details, but I have lost my best friend. I feel so empty and this constant, underlying sense of chaos. On the outside I'm calm, but easily frustrated. I just feel sad and so alone.

I've been keeping myself busy, and have more to do than I have time and energy for. But these feelings won't go away. I have this urge to latch on to someone, anyone, and not let go.
 

Bluerose31

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I don't feel comfortable sharing the details, but I have lost my best friend. I feel so empty and this constant, underlying sense of chaos. On the outside I'm calm, but easily frustrated. I just feel sad and so alone.

I've been keeping myself busy, and have more to do than I have time and energy for. But these feelings won't go away. I have this urge to latch on to someone, anyone, and not let go.
I pray Jesus will be a friend to you and fill your heart with his love so that you will find peace.
 
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JAM2b

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I wanted to update.

The sense of chaos has passed and so has the urge to latch on to someone. The sadness and emptiness remains, but it's not as strong. The bad feelings usually just come at moments of frustration or something really I want to share, but I can't share it with my friend. The one person I always turned to first is no longer in my life.

"If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." Ecclesiastes 4:10

God created us in a such a way that we need other people, companionship. It is a biological and psychological need. When there is no one in our life who can be a close and emotionally intimate friend we have a void. I had posted a reply in another thread that I'm not afraid of being single for the rest of my life, but I am afraid of being totally alone, without friends and family.

I have very recently began taking part in a new church plant, still working on building funds and thinking of location. We are becoming friends fairly quickly, but there is no history or emotional or spiritual intimacy to build on. These people are very new in my life. I have a few friends at work, but they are pretty new, also.
 
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JAM2b

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It's been about a month since I started this thread. Things are feeling better.

I've been very busy and preoccupied with dealing with some problems and getting to know these new church people better. It was very hard at first to go through things without my friend to lean on like I used to be able to. But I survived. My life has been full of support from others.
 
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JAM2b

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I was hit with another wave of this last night. I had a very rough end to a very long week and very long and hard previous month. My physical pain level was high last night, and I was utterly exhausted. There was not a human I could reach out to and pour my heart out to in detail who has known me well for a long time, with history, and deep, intimate caring.

I ended up just praying, and going to bed. I got better sleep last night than I have in weeks. I woke with renewed strength and hope. Still alone, but renewed.
 
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