Never ending memories

[Jh24]

Hi all,

so I posted on here a few months back about my toxic ex and all the things she said and did. I’m happy to say I’m reconnecting with God again and learning to trust in Him and His will especially in these times, but I still can’t get over the pain and memories that I have no matter how much I try. I can’t get over all the things she said to me, but I also can’t get over the feelings of love I had for her. I feel like I had my chance at love and that I won’t realise my goal of getting married and having a family. I trust God with my life, and all I want now is to serve Him, but I still can’t get over the memories of her and the pain that it brings. Could it be some sort of sign it something? Can anyone tell me what I should to do?

 

[Jesus is my Superhero]

It's normal to feel these emotions when faced with the emotional upheaval in your life. Accept that this is a process over time, which the length varies from person to person. Your responsibility is to know this and not let your emotions wreck your life. Work through it, with friends or family, and learn from it. Being a Christian, follow the lead of the Holy Spirit and protect yourself from the natural inclinations to mess yourself up with sin. Much Peace of Jesus to you.

 

[Larniavc]

Hi all,

so I posted on here a few months back about my toxic ex and all the things she said and did. I’m happy to say I’m reconnecting with God again and learning to trust in Him and His will especially in these times, but I still can’t get over the pain and memories that I have no matter how much I try. I can’t get over all the things she said to me, but I also can’t get over the feelings of love I had for her. I feel like I had my chance at love and that I won’t realise my goal of getting married and having a family. I trust God with my life, and all I want now is to serve Him, but I still can’t get over the memories of her and the pain that it brings. Could it be some sort of sign it something? Can anyone tell me what I should to do?

Unfortunately (or fortunately) what you describe is a normal reaction to the circumstances you describe.

How long have you been experiencing them?

 

[Jh24]

Unfortunately (or fortunately) what you describe is a normal reaction to the circumstances you describe.

How long have you been experiencing them?

Every day since I left her. The memories just invade my mind a cause me pain. I miss her, but I don’t miss the pain the caused me. I just want to move on and no matter how much I try to and how much I ask God. It’s just so hard. Some days are better than others but it still hurts being alone.

 

[Larniavc]

Every day since I left her. The memories just invade my mind a cause me pain. I miss her, but I don’t miss the pain the caused me. I just want to move on and no matter how much I try to and how much I ask God. It’s just so hard. Some days are better than others but it still hurts being alone.

How long as in how many months?

 

[Jh24]

How long as in how many months?

6 months since I left her, and we were together 12 months

 

[Larniavc]

6 months since I left her, and we were together 12 months

Do you mind me asking how old you are?

 

[Jh24]

Do you mind me asking how old you are?

26

 

[Larniavc]

26

It can be really tough at that age- I remember it well. It does get better but that’s not much comfort right now.

Our brains have a tendency to ruminate on bad things when we have the opportunity to do so. Find something that you can focus your attention on. Occupy your senses to focus on the ‘now’ so that your brain has less opportunity to engage in rumination.

Google ‘mindfulness’ and give that a go or take a look at this link.

https://cedar.exeter.ac.uk/media/un...cedar/documents/liiapt/Unhelpful_Thoughts.pdf

All the best.