Need help discerning....

[kaykay637]

Well, as I posted on another thread I am having a tough OCD week. Been doing pretty well for awhile but I read something and it sent me spiraling straight into OCD-land.

I am quite sure that many of you as Christians struggle with this so I'm asking for input. For me, this is usually the manifestation of my OCD issues/obsessions now. This is kinda where "the rubber meets the road" for me and what throws me into OCD-land--how do we as Christians discern what is something the Lord would have us do/not do/attend do versus what is just OCD obsession??? In other words, how do we discern between the Lord's direction/conviction and an OCD obsession?

How do we identify what's "obsession" and what's something that is worthy of our attention and focus???

 

[Jayangel81]

OK all i got to say is this part of OCD outright stinks...

For sometime now i have had this drive me bonkers. This is what the Lord has been trying to show me i believe.

When we are to do something that God wants us to do He will make us know not in our heads but in our hearts, What i mean is We wont be able to explain how we know.. We just will know by faith. I personally have shut myself down to beleiving anything, i cant trust my feelings, thoughts. God wants me to test everything.

What better way to know than whats in youre hearts. Im still grasping it.. If i ask myself "does God want me to do this" and obsess over it. I write it off as OCD.

Usually if you keep saying "what if" its OCD obsessions too.

As far as conviction..Considering we doubt i dono but with everything, trying to reassure ourselves whats sin and whats not. Pray, its the only way. In the end God Knows in our hearts we dont want to Sin but rather we are afraid.

Just keep praying for discernment.
im praying for you

brother in Christ

 

[ObsessedButBlessed]

This is what I would do. Does it pass the Bible litmus test? That is, does it go against anything that God's Word tells us, or does it align with his Word? If it aligns with his Word, we know we can act accordingly and not displease God. If it doesn't, then I think whatever this action is, is something to reconsider.

In the case of neutral questions, like "should I go to Wisconsin?", again, does it go against God's Word? No - God never said "thou shall not go to Wisconsin in the month of February", so I think we're ok.

Even in the case of conviction/prodding by the Holy Spirit, if it is something that is explicitly outlined in the Bible, then you can trust it is from God. If it is NOT (such as the user who posted about witnessing before midnight - obviously this is not instructed in the Bible,), then we can decipher that it is OCD.

And, keep in mind the golden rule of religious OCD: God never speaks to us in the form of fear, anxiety, or great emotional duress. He is a God of love, one who comforts us, and wishes us to run towards him, not away from him. His conviction is a message of love, and not fear.

And the golden rule of OCD: If it talks like OCD, walks like OCD, acts like OCD... it's OCD.

Hope this helps.

 

[kaykay637]

Well, thank you both for your insights!
Jayangel, I do bear witness with what you said about "knowing in your heart" versus your head. It seems that this is how God had usually given me correct guidance too. I know what you mean.

Sad, I really liked what you said about "if it talks like OCD, walks like OCD, ......." LOL! I think we usually do know deep down when it's OCD. One psychologist I read said that he couldn't think of a time when he had a patient that thought something was OCD when it was actually real. He said a person who battles OCD will not usually ever label a "real" threat as OCD. Hope I'm explaining that clearly!

 

[gracealone]

Well, thank you both for your insights!
Jayangel, I do bear witness with what you said about "knowing in your heart" versus your head. It seems that this is how God had usually given me correct guidance too. I know what you mean.

Sad, I really liked what you said about "if it talks like OCD, walks like OCD, ......." LOL! I think we usually do know deep down when it's OCD. One psychologist I read said that he couldn't think of a time when he had a patient that thought something was OCD when it was actually real. He said a person who battles OCD will not usually ever label a "real" threat as OCD. Hope I'm explaining that clearly!

Hi KayKay,
I'm thinking that the very fact that you are on the forum looking for an answer or reassurance about this, thought, question, doubt might be a huge clue that it's probably OCD.
Loved everything Sad had to say about Biblical direction also.
People sometimes do the opposite thing of what we with OCD do. They rely on "feel good" emotions to give them direction. I knew a woman who once said "I'm quite sure that God wants me to marry this man because I took a walk in the woods and asked Him if it was His will for me to marry this man. Then I just had this wonderful feeling that let me know that He approved... so I'm gonna go ahead and date him." Mind you this "man" was married. So everything that the Bible had to say on this matter was shoved aside because of a feel good emotion she had about the whole thing.
OCD uses our "Feel bad, feel guilty, feel anxious, feel basically freaked out!!", emotions to get us to thinking that these thoughts are valid when they are not.
You are right that usually, deep down, we know when it's the OCD nagging at us. But that stab of anxiety that lingering dread of "what if it's not?!" is hard to get rid of and confusingly/annoyingly most often is also a big part of the OCD game plan.
Praying for you my friend that you'll be able to "stop looking for the exits" and relax.
Mitzi

 

[ObsessedButBlessed]

Hi KayKay,
I'm thinking that the very fact that you are on the forum looking for an answer or reassurance about this, thought, question, doubt might be a huge clue that it's probably OCD.
Loved everything Sad had to say about Biblical direction also.
People sometimes do the opposite thing of what we with OCD do. They rely on "feel good" emotions to give them direction. I knew a woman who once said "I'm quite sure that God wants me to marry this man because I took a walk in the woods and asked Him if it was His will for me to marry this man. Then I just had this wonderful feeling that let me know that He approved... so I'm gonna go ahead and date him." Mind you this "man" was married. So everything that the Bible had to say on this matter was shoved aside because of a feel good emotion she had about the whole thing.
OCD uses our "Feel bad, feel guilty, feel anxious, feel basically freaked out!!", emotions to get us to thinking that these thoughts are valid when they are not.
You are right that usually, deep down, we know when it's the OCD nagging at us. But that stab of anxiety that lingering dread of "what if it's not?!" is hard to get rid of and confusingly/annoyingly most often is also a big part of the OCD game plan.
Praying for you my friend that you'll be able to "stop looking for the exits" and relax.
Mitzi

Mitzi, I wish I could print out what you just wrote, because I beleive that is the crux of my OCD.

Before I had full-blown OCD, I used to try and get a FEELING about God's answers to my prayers. And - wonder of all wonders - it was *always* about relationship.

"God, is this guy the guy I'm going to marry?" *waits patiently for a feeling*

It's taken 25 years of undoing the way that I make decisions (emotion-based) to try and make decisions based on logic, and not how I feel. Because OCD takes all the bad feelings and makes them seem true, and when we desperately, desperately try to find those "right feelings" that tell us they're not true...we can't seem to find them. It seems as though OCD is the master manipulator of emotions.

 

[gracealone]

Mitzi, I wish I could print out what you just wrote, because I beleive that is the crux of my OCD.

Before I had full-blown OCD, I used to try and get a FEELING about God's answers to my prayers. And - wonder of all wonders - it was *always* about relationship.

"God, is this guy the guy I'm going to marry?" *waits patiently for a feeling*

It's taken 25 years of undoing the way that I make decisions (emotion-based) to try and make decisions based on logic, and not how I feel. Because OCD takes all the bad feelings and makes them seem true, and when we desperately, desperately try to find those "right feelings" that tell us they're not true...we can't seem to find them. It seems as though OCD is the master manipulator of emotions.

Hi Sad,
Yes, the emotional validation thing plays such a huge role in OCD. Me too!!
I try to do as CS Lewis said. "We just need to learn to tell these moods where to get off."
God Bless,
Mitzi

 

[kaykay637]

Good advice, all.

Mitzi, yes you nailed it when you said a lot of times we really believe it's OCD talking, but that nagging doubt of "what if it's not?" is what usually gets to me.

And also, I would affirm that we do need to make biblically based decisions. It can be extremely deceptive to just go with "feelings." Let me clarify that when I agreed with Jayangel that sometimes I know "in my heart" vs. my head what God wants me to do or not do, I don't mean just a feeling. It's more of an "inner knowing or guidance which obviously takes into account the wisdom and authority of God's Word-the Bible.

Where I get thrown into OCD-land is on those moral conundrums or dilemnas that sometimes occur in everyday life that are not specifically addressed in the Bible. God's wisdom is needed about applying biblical principles sometimes to real life. That's where my OCD struggles usually start hitting the fan. I second-guess myself tremendously and I think that's part of the OCD.

 

[marcb]

I find that "normal" Christians I talk to have this conundrum as well.

I went through a time where I tried to "interpret" every thought, encounter, etc.

Several experiences have been from the LORD, and they are very clear. Since he knows us so perfectly, ocd and all, I don't think He would drop a nebulous thought that leaves us guessing.

I think God makes His will clear over time and through a variety of situations, including words from others who are "in tune," not just one thought. If we are striving to obey and put God first, we are not likely to go wrong. If we do get it wrong, He will not forsake us; He is the faithful one in the relationship.

Here's a scenario: someone asks you for food. Should I give them a sandwich? Of course. How do I know it's God's will? It's in the gospel. I've been in situations where I pray over something simple like that, to discern if it's God's will, looking for a "sign". Looking back, I realize that whole situation was a sign to step out in obedience. Of course much of life is more complex than this, but we do seem to overanalyze.

I'd like to start with the simple and leave the rest to God. Then, maybe it all becomes simple....

I have tried to make Isaiah 55:8,9 a theme:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."

 

[Jayangel81]

Good insight Marcb.

I was driving earlier thinking about all this, actually...ive been obsessing over it.

I was thinking to myself maybe im going through all this wonder/analyzing and worrying for a reason. I cant help but feel God is going to teach me a lesson in how to really be sure how to Discern His spirit.

Like marcb said His Word is something we should be testing it against too.

As marcb said God does know us and how/if were goinna miss it. So he knows how to make us sure that it is from Him. So far using the bible and listening to my heart have been working wonders

I pray we all get discernment so we may follow our Fathers Will

brother in Christ

 

[jc9992]

I have found that if OCD causes you to want to do something and you think its God.It wont work out.

But if it is God telling you something, it will have a lot better results.

 

[rubycakes]

I used to be TOTALLY stuck on emotional validation. I'm not as bad as I used to be. I think one thing that helped me was talking to my pastor when I was obsessing about my marriage and I thought maybe God was telling me to get a divorce. He told me not to be swayed by emotions and that God would never tell me to get a divorce. YOu have to check and see if what youre feeling or thinking has biblical basis. THis has helped me a great deal with my relationship obsessions.

 

[kaykay637]

I used to be TOTALLY stuck on emotional validation. I'm not as bad as I used to be. I think one thing that helped me was talking to my pastor when I was obsessing about my marriage and I thought maybe God was telling me to get a divorce. He told me not to be swayed by emotions and that God would never tell me to get a divorce. YOu have to check and see if what youre feeling or thinking has biblical basis. THis has helped me a great deal with my relationship obsessions.

Yes, we do need to filter our thoughts through the filter of the Bible. And even then it is good sometimes, especially with things of major import, to run it by our spiritual authorities because OCD run amuck, sometimes needs to be reined in by some Godly counsel. I have also had situations where the OCD, in retrospect, was clearly clouding my judgment on an issue.