need a miracle

[Sri]

need a miracle
I'm a christian, but i've been off work the last 41/2 months because I hear a voice in my head. It is tormenting me. I've rebuked it. I've prayed. I've had doctors try to figure out what medicine i should be taking. I've gone 3 weeks without any problems and then boom i am having problems again. It was so bad once that it woke me up and heard it all day had to lay in bed all day and then couldn't sleep without benadyrll. and this lasted a few days. It took over my eyesight for awhile where I couldn't see in front of me but had to look up at the ceiling. very tourterous. thank you God that that has happend in some time. I need a miracle I don't know what to do . i listen to praise and worship all day every day. I don't know why this is happening to me. I need God.

 

[hoonchang]

Sri,
I don't know what to do expect say a prayer for you tonight. I have been going through a crisis as well, but mine is more oriented around whether or not the things I have been hearing and experiencing are real or not. I have been pretty scared, but it seems like a lot of people are going through much tougher situations than I am.
I can't offer you much in the way of advice, but please feel loved by the Lord. Never doubt His love for us. Struggle produces such clear vision after the struggle is gone. I feel like I am getting closer to clearer vision. All I know is my struggle has produced in me much love for our Lord. I am beginning to let go of indulging in sin slowly, and more devoted to doing His work.
I hope you will find peace soon.
I will type you a prayer:
In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
Lord, please help your servant Sri tonight. If you are not ready to remove her affliction yet, please give her the strength to make it through. Lord, let her never doubt Your love for her. Lord, please give her a least a little bit of comfort through this prayer. As others came to my aid in my crisis, please send your servants to comfort her in her need.
We love you and pray in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord,
Amen.
Sri, I hope you found at least a small measure of comfort in reading this.
God Bless.

 

[hoonchang]

Just wanted to add a little more...
The past 4 months of my life have been the greatest struggle of my life. I repeatedly asked the Lord to end it, but it kept going. I don't know whats going on in your life, but at least in my case I was receiving a harsh correction. In my lifetime I have been hospitalized 11 times since I was 21 years old. I just turned 30, and I have been hospitalized 4 times in the past 4 months alone. The previous times were as well pretty scary and disturbing, but when it was over I always went back to my life of sin and being angry at the Lord for not giving me my way in life. I thought I was a discarded soul whose earthly life was all I had left. I thought for sure I was a son of hell, and that my earthly life had no more meaning or the possibility of redemption. I spent at least one night trying to stay awake because I thought for sure I was going to wake up in hell. I would have a couple days of peace, and then right back into the storm of thinking I was a discarded soul. It may not sound like much, but I was as scared as I have ever been in my life, thinking I was destined for hell and terrified by what I would experience there.
I tried to repent in some intense ways. I won't get into everything, but I even missed my oldest friend's wedding last month. I was supposed to be his best man. I will share one thing however... during one of my more scared moments of harsh repenting (for lack of a better expression) I even swallowed a stone that was 3.4 cm wide. I ended up in the hospital where I heard the devil tell me that I would have to have surgery to remove the stone and I would die from an allergic reaction to the anesthesia, at which point I would wake up in hell. I really honestly believed I was a discarded soul and was terrified of what I would experience in hell. They moved me from the ER to the surgery ward, and after a few hours of pacing and feeling like the most worthless form of human existence, a peace came over me and I fell asleep. The Dr told me that they were waiting to see if the stone would move through my system and exit on its own, but I heard what the devil told me and I was convinced that I would die on the operating table. In addition, I felt the stone lodged in my abdomen. It had not moved the entire day once it moved from my stomach to my side.
I took x-rays the next morning so the Dr could check if the stone moved. They were extremely busy so it took until mid afternoon to hear back from him, not that I had any hope that it had. However, much to my surprise he told me that he could not find it on the x-ray. They told me that it was possible that it was still in my system and that it was obstructed in a dark spot on the x-ray. I started to feel hope that the Lord was yet again forgiving me, but just a tiny bit. Too little to feel anything close to loved. They started to let me eat the liquid diet plan.
The next day, the Dr could not find the stone in the x-ray yet again! I even had a bowel movement, and I swear to you that I did not pass the stone with my stool... you may not believe this, but I firmly believe the Lord miraculously removed the stone from my body!
I am still tempted to believe that I am unforgiven and destined for hell at times, but I keep remembering that the Lord saved my life. Even the actual event is such a clear sign! The Lord removed something from my body that did not belong there to save my life! I still feel fear at times, but I just remember the sign I received to remove the unnecessary things from my life. He even allowed me to meet a new friend at the hospital who attempted to commit suicide. He hears voices when he takes drugs, and was having a very difficult time as well. Through our conversations, he told me that I explain things to him in a way that is easy to relate to, and that he feels blessed to have me as a friend!
I guess the point I am trying to make is that your time of suffering will end at some point, and you will be richly blessed for having suffered. I am sure of it. So please fight and do your best to keep up your hope!
God Bless you Sri!

 

[Gordon12]

Sorry to hear this. I am praying for you.