My Mother Is Guilting Me About My Faith

[Monk Brendan]

Hi everyone, I'm Jess. I'm 24 years old, born and raised Catholic, but as of the last couple years, I've left the Catholic church and considered myself a Christian. I've been attending a Baptist church for about a year and a half with my boyfriend and so far I really like it there.

(If anyone is curious, I did not leave the Catholic church because of my boyfriend and it's not like he ever asked me to. I only left Catholicism because I don't believe in praying to Saints, God's forgiveness being only obtainable through confession, or purgatory. No judgement on anyone who does believe those things, but I personally don't. I don't want to start any religious debates, this is purely for context)

My mother, however, has never been okay with this. She believes that because I was raised Catholic, I should always be Catholic, and in her mind I've changed religions, not denominations, religions. Here's the thing: She doesn't go to church anymore. She claims that she doesn't go because she's angry at God for taking her son away (my brother passed away 13 years ago).

Today, my Mum approached me and told me that she just can't be okay with my new faith. She wants to see me married in the Catholic church, by a priest, so she wants me to go back to the Catholic church despite my beliefs. If I do, she says that she'll go back too, because "that's her miracle".

So now, I feel like unless I abandon my convictions and go back to my old church, I'm at fault for her lack of faith, and that thought really makes my heart hurt. What should I do? Any prayers and/or advice is welcome.

Catholics ARE Christians, as are the Orthodox and members of other pre-reformation Churches.

Why are you making this false distinction between "Catholic" and "Christian"?

Please explain.

 

[Karin12414]

Catholics ARE Christians, as are the Orthodox and members of other pre-reformation Churches.

Why are you making this false distinction between "Catholic" and "Christian"?

Please explain.

My point exactly

 

[fat wee robin]

Please be careful when generalizing and using the word "hate". Not ALL protestants are ignorant of history and culture. I know quite a few Baptists that are very knowledgeable about the history and cultures of many different places. I also know some that don't know a single thing and some in the middle, like myself, that are still learning.

As I stated earlier, there is NO denomination better than an other. ALL Churches are (supposed to be) part of the Universal Bride and Christ peruses ALL of them. So, being a Christian, making a statement like "I hate protestants" is equal to claiming you hate a piece of the Bride or a Piece of the Body of Christ. You can't love God but "hate" some of His people.

I understand what you meant by the statement, but you have to be very careful when you state things like that. Especially when talking to or around non-believers that are searching for a Church they could fit in.

As much as I hate it, the world has become very sensitive about word choice and we have to be the most mindful of our choices in words because the world is watching us with a magnifying glass.

Oh I don't hate protestants at all ,but my overall experience here in Europe , especially the U.K. is the total lack of interest in the cultures which make up the U K., like that of Scotland ,Wales and Ireland (northern ).Not only do they not learn in Government schools about each other, they do not know about their own history . The schools are protestant, in so far as the established churches are protestant and the govt..
Wonderful literature ,interesting history, if it does not promote the interests of
the ruling people , is twisted ,but mostly just ignored, and don't dare challenge that . It gets very tiring to supposedly be part of G.B. but feel closer to the Russians ,or French ,or almost any other culture .

 

[Karin12414]

Oh I don't hate protestants at all ,but my overall experience here in Europe , especially the U.K. is the total lack of interest in the cultures which make up the U K., like that of Scotland ,Wales and Ireland (northern ).Not only do they not learn in Government schools about each other, they do not know about their own history . The schools are protestant, in so far as the established churches are protestant and the govt..
Wonderful literature ,interesting history, if it does not promote the interests of
the ruling people , is twisted ,but mostly just ignored, and don't dare challenge that . It gets very tiring to supposedly be part of G.B. but feel closer to the Russians ,or French ,or almost any other culture .

I guess I can understand that. America is far from the "Christian Nation" it claims to be. It is absolutely frustrating to see people not care, but I still think it is an individual/societal issue more than it is a protestant issue.

 

[Andrew77]

Hi everyone, I'm Jess. I'm 24 years old, born and raised Catholic, but as of the last couple years, I've left the Catholic church and considered myself a Christian. I've been attending a Baptist church for about a year and a half with my boyfriend and so far I really like it there.

(If anyone is curious, I did not leave the Catholic church because of my boyfriend and it's not like he ever asked me to. I only left Catholicism because I don't believe in praying to Saints, God's forgiveness being only obtainable through confession, or purgatory. No judgement on anyone who does believe those things, but I personally don't. I don't want to start any religious debates, this is purely for context)

My mother, however, has never been okay with this. She believes that because I was raised Catholic, I should always be Catholic, and in her mind I've changed religions, not denominations, religions. Here's the thing: She doesn't go to church anymore. She claims that she doesn't go because she's angry at God for taking her son away (my brother passed away 13 years ago).

Today, my Mum approached me and told me that she just can't be okay with my new faith. She wants to see me married in the Catholic church, by a priest, so she wants me to go back to the Catholic church despite my beliefs. If I do, she says that she'll go back too, because "that's her miracle".

So now, I feel like unless I abandon my convictions and go back to my old church, I'm at fault for her lack of faith, and that thought really makes my heart hurt. What should I do? Any prayers and/or advice is welcome.

So, to be honest with you, I had a completely different reaction..... but then I'm not you. Obviously, right? That's my wisdom from beyond the ages. "I'm not you". Write it down, that will be worth money some day.

Seriously though..... I can't help it but think you are literally following in the steps, Jesus himself spoke of.

Luke 12:51
Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division.
From now on there will be five in one family divided against each other, three against two and two against three. They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law."

Every person that comes to Jesus will be tested, and you right now are living out the very words of Jesus Christ in literal terms.

You are taking a stand for your faith, believing the scriptures, and now you are tested.

Matthew 10:37
"Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me."

Pretty clear?

Anyone who takes a stand for their faith, at some point is going to be opposed. Anyone. If a person takes a stand for Christianity, and isn't opposed, then something is wrong.

Now I get it, you would hope that the one group of people that you could count on to be in your corner, would be your family, and your parents.... but sometimes that isn't the case.

If I were you, I would hold to your faith, and maintain your stance. You can't fix other people. You can only fix you.

 

[Monk Brendan]

What you're saying has no relevance to the issue at hand. And no, the Bible does not say our friends and family in heaven intercede for us, it says Jesus Christ intercedes for us.

Did you know that the Psalter contains invocations to Angels asking for their prayers?

 

[FireDragon76]

Quoted earlier "]The crisis which is happening now, hopefully will bring profound changes and clear out the rot . You should relook at the idea of the 5TH commanment ,which is foundational to our moral health to take seriously .You have only one mother and can never have an other ,so if you can please her heart, and help it to heal , I am sure God will approve indeed ."

To paraphrase, Jess, you better stay Catholic to help please your poor, sad mother. I wonder if you'd get this 'remember the 5th commandment' advice if you were a protestant entertaining Catholicism against your protestant mother's wishes. Guilt and name calling is what you should prepare for. This is why the world's Mary statues are all crying-they want you to feel guilty. Now go tell the sad statue you're sorry already and go light yourself a candle, missy!

Since Vatican II, Catholics do not generally believe in proselytizing Protestants or engaging in extreme anti-Protestant polemics. They do however defend their own faith, which should not be misunderstood as proselytism.

Protestants would do well to return a similar degree of respect.

 

[Chris V++]

No need for sarcasm ,but yes I am not strictly speaking a Catholic but a seeker ,a real seeker

I'm sincerely sorry for my rude comments. I feel a lot of guilt for hurting my parents by switching faith and over reacted. This thread motivated me to start studying early church history in more depth.