Yes, I agree that if you do something like feed the poor, but out of obligation, resent having to be there, while the act is good, I don't believe that is a moral or act of kindness.
However, I will also say this: People often have asked me how one loves their neighbor as we ought to. I think there are two factors: One is to pray for that love, for the love of God to just flow through you and make you more loving. The HS has often shown me that it is the highest will of the Father for us to love one another, and to pray for love from the Father, and he gives it generously. I'm not sure many Christians pray for love. A new job, a relationship, for their team to win as if God is a genie granting wishes, rather than ask the Father what he asks of you. There was a time when my psycho neighborhood watch really stepped over the line invading the privacy of me and my roommate by spying on us in our house jn the bedroom, and bathroom. I told God I know I was to forgive them, but the only way I could do that was to be given thst forgiveness. And was given.
The other part is to put your love in action make it a habit, like the phrase Practice Random Acts of Kindness. There was a woman in Toronto who would go buy apples, water, meat cheese and bread, making sack lunches, then go to parks, bridges, and ask homeless people if they needed some food. It was a small act of kindness, but if everyone made a drop, we would have an ocean. And even if you start off wondering if any of it makes a difference, seems like a lot of work, each time you do these small acts of kindness, it changes you. You don't see it right away, because it's a babystep towards becoming kinder. But it soon becomes your nature.
The combination of asking for love, then acting in faith, changes you into a more loving person, and you will see the fruit of the spirit in yourself.
I compare it to going to the gum. You keep meaning to. Finally, you do. You decide to commit one hour/day, running, lifting, biking, something. When you don't want to go, you go anyway.
6 months later, you start to feel the need to exercise, your food choices may change, you look better, you feel better.
If I bring you to the gym, and you keep telling me that you don't want to be there, you don't like exercising, you are only doing this for me, chances are, you won't go again. Sure, if I have a lot of patience, and could get you to go for a month, at which time you could stop, you would most likely start to like it. But if we all do it once as part of a company outing obligation once, chances are it won't have much impact.
Re: morality - a friend of mine told me that her church group went to a secondhand clothing store to volunteer to sort clothes for the homeless. Their leader found a very nice leather coat that was donated, and decided to take it as "payment" for working. That, I believe, was highly unethical. Basically, not only did she steal, and set a bad example for the people in the church group, but she stole from homeless people. That's cold.
