Missing Something for Sexual Freedom?

[ll_retro.duck_ll]

Hello, been struggling with an addiction to inappropriate content ever since middle-school and even after I became a Christian (20+ yrs). I grew in knowledge of the Word of God and Christian service over the years. What became an everyday act became limited to about 1-2 times every week 2 weeks. The longest I have ever gone is 3 months, after reading "every man's battle." The thing is, during those 3 months, I wasn't tempted at all. That is, until one particular morning. Left my home to "flee" the temptation, but the desire overwhelmed me no matter how much I was praying to God. I fell, and was never able to reach that length of time ever again, even though it's been about 10 yrs since that point. I get very envious of people who experience a freedom to such an extent that they go years if not months without a relapse. Something just triggers for them like a buddy of mine who struggled with it, then one day, he lost all desire to act out and had been clean since. I also read Augustine's struggle, who after praying and reading a verse in Romans experienced a transformation that nearly vanquished this sin from his life. I've gathered the scriptures, I've sought out ways to "control my body in a way that is holy and honorable", I have limited the provisions for my flesh (no smart phone/limited internet access), I am married. However, my sin finds me and is now even worse than ever especially with lock down season now. I have to admit it's very frustrating. God will answer my prayers on many things. This one, he seems to be very silent on. I can't help but feel alone with this struggle. I want the tranformation they had. My soul is at stake and the well-being of my marriage and ministry. What is the priority right now if not controlling this? Has God answered my prayers but I'm too simple to see it? Did miss something in scripture? Could use some guidance rn. Thanks

 

[HatedByAll]

Total freedom from inappropriate content comes from the Holy Spirit. I don't even know how long ago it was when the Holy Spirit freed me from that sin. Maybe 15 or even 20 years ago? I can not brag though. There are steps to take to control it, but I was failing. Accountability, inappropriate content blockers, etc are good tools to use, but I did not care enough to bother with taking those steps. Then, one night looking at inappropriate content I heard that still small voice of the Lord. What I heard and clearly understood was that inappropriate content absolutely could not satisfy me. My thoughts, which I believe was the prompting of the Holy Spirit, was this can't satisfy me. The more I looked at that stuff the more and more I desired look at it. I was trapped, but that night, I realized that looking at inappropriate content was just like jumping off a high cliff. There is no bottom. It can not satisfy.

Coming to that realization made me lose the desire to view inappropriate content. The desire was just gone. In my case, I did not do anything to stop. I stopped because of being called out of sin by the Holy Spirit. So, my advice is just to listen for that His still small voice. You too can be freed from that sin by the Grace of God.

 

[ll_retro.duck_ll]

Total freedom from inappropriate content comes from the Holy Spirit. I don't even know how long ago it was when the Holy Spirit freed me from that sin. Maybe 15 or even 20 years ago? I can not brag though. There are steps to take to control it, but I was failing. Accountability, inappropriate content blockers, etc are good tools to use, but I did not care enough to bother with taking those steps. Then, one night looking at inappropriate content I heard that still small voice of the Lord. What I heard and clearly understood was that inappropriate content absolutely could not satisfy me. My thoughts, which I believe was the prompting of the Holy Spirit, was this can't satisfy me. The more I looked at that stuff the more and more I desired look at it. I was trapped, but that night, I realized that looking at inappropriate content was just like jumping off a high cliff. There is no bottom. It can not satisfy.

Coming to that realization made me lose the desire to view inappropriate content. The desire was just gone. In my case, I did not do anything to stop. I stopped because of being called out of sin by the Holy Spirit. So, my advice is just to listen for that His still small voice. You too can be freed from that sin by the Grace of God.

I would gladly receive one of those moment; I've been praying for one of those moments for a very very long time where an initiative taken by the Spirit slays and binds up the power this temptation has. A roommate of mine many years ago had the same experience as you and has been clean (as far as I know) for well over ten years now. It just happened, and I grew jealous for the experience where I receive power. When I became a Christian, God did take something away from me: depression and suicidal tendencies. Never again have I dropped back into it. Perhaps the Lord is receiving glory through my struggle with this sin. I don't know