I understand. I'm definetly not comfortable with satisfaction theories. And I agree that Jesus's death has been understood as a sacrifice.
I guess my issue is with the concept of needing a sacrifice at all. Keyword, "needing" - does God need sacrifices? I think not.
So perhaps the answer really is just a matter of choosing how to interpret sacrifice in the first place. The idea of requiring blood to appease God is disturbing to me, but thinking of Jesus as the victor over death, or as a peaceful God-man willing putting an end to sacrifice forever, is more palatable. As a recent blog I read put it, perhaps Jesus's sacrifice is the means by which all of our score-keeping (& thus appeasement) is invalidated.
Here are a few thoughts:
Let us rule out, to begin, the notion that Christ's sacrifice pays, answers or atones for a
debt of punishment: That is, a payment, the content of which is punishment in terms of torments or deprivation for their own sakes.
Now that we have ruled out a debt of punishment for Christ's sacrifice, let's rule it out for Old Testament sacrifices, too. Old Testament sacrifices were not paying a debt of punishment to God. After all, the Hebrews didn't sentence or torture their animals to death, and some of the sacrifices were not animals at all, but rather grain. Not to mention the offerings of firstfruits, which were often non-animal. Sacrifices were also eaten
by the people in some circumstances, such as the Paschal lamb.
So if the sacrifice isn't filling up a debt of punishment, what it is doing? Well, here's a thought: There is a debt, but it is a debt of righteousness, not punishment. That is, the content of the payment is righteousness, not torments or punishment.
And righteousness is life,
And life is being in communion or toward communion.
If these three are one, or at least interconnected in the right way, then we can make some better sense out of the sacrifices. Life is in the blood, hence why it was given to fill the break in life/communion/righteousness. What of the firstfruits and the grain offerings? They were real self-emptyings toward God. They are a very movement towards God, being poor towards God. And being poor towards someone is necessary for communion.
So Christ becomes man, and becomes truly, totally poor towards God, filling up unrighteousness (death, anti-communion) with his righteousness (life, being toward communion). There is no communion without sacrifice, because sacrifice is in some sense the very content of communion.
Now, the classic question, why did God have to do it? Why didn't he just zap the debt paid? Well, because if the debt is righteousness, and righteousness is being toward communion, and being toward communion is being totally poor toward the other, then the only way to pay it is by being totally poor toward the other. And God zapping that the case seems to involve making us who we're not while we're still us, and God can't do that. (The question, "why didn't God just force us or predispose us to be totally poor toward the other, then?" pertains to the whole problem of free will and moral responsibility, which is a different topic).
Now, the Psalm 51 question: God cares about spirit only, right? And spirit only means my mental intentions, right? Like how David said God doesn't want physical sacrifices, just a broken spirit? So why did he
require these ugly, physical, tangible, slimy sacrifices?
Well, to that I have to say: Nope. Mental intentions aren't acts of being toward communion, repentance, reconciliation, being poor toward the other. They aren't significant of themselves. And that reading of Psalm 51 is baloney. Some shadowy intention floating around in the ether doesn't count for anything in the real world, and thank God for that. When a peasant offers one of his only birds, that's repentance. Thinking about being humble simply isn't.