No, they are most definitely not the same and yes there is a hierarchy in which the neighbor relationship is subordinate.
Start with the marital covenant. I have no such covenant with my neighbor; no such vows/pledges/promises were made or received between us as is the case in a marital relationship in which the two parties were wedded, and married (i.e., joined together) to become one. More significantly, the wedding vows do not form a two-person covenant, but a three person covenant - one of those parties is God! The couple makes vows to the priest who stands in their presence as an agent of God. You covenanted with God to love your spouse and to do so in the diversity of circumstances inherent to all life (rich, poor, healthy, ill, etc.). The marital covenant is a temporal reflection of a divine relationship; marriage mirrors the trinity.
Another way to understand this is seen in God's differing degrees and kinds of love. He loves His enemies and causes His sun and His rain to fall on the ungodly and godly alike but He clearly loves those covered by the blood of His Son differently. In the end this will become appallingly apparent because those who love God, believing in His resurrected Son to their salvation from sin and for whom no condemnation now exists, will reap eternal life while those who were hostile to God denying He and His Son will reap painful separation, decay and destruction. God loves differently.
And, of course, you probably already know there are four Greek terms translated as a single term "love" in English. Love is simply a term we use to discuss value. We value God above all else. We value our spouse and children uniquely because we have covenanted with God to do so. We covenant with God to love our neighbor according to His law, and we do the same with His enemies.... only differently
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