- Oct 23, 2003
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My son passed away last year in a horrific grad car accident.
Yes, it's worse than anyone could imagine. But that said, I'd like to offer some advice or answer any questions if anyone has any.
First thing. And only thing. If you know anyone who is dealing with this, a simple I'm thinking about you is nice. Don't say it's going to be hard. Or it must be hard. That is especially true on birthdays, christmas, father's day, anniversaries, actually any day. The reason for this is you can be having a good day, and then someone says it and you start to feel bad for having a good day. Both my older son and I felt this. Christmas is nice. Then we're told it must be hard, then it makes it hard.
That's my biggest piece of advice. For anyone going through this, my second piece of advice is recognize the depression when it comes. And it will. It sucks. But if you've never felt that type, you'll almost just feel hopeless. It's one of the stages of grief and it can come at any time.
That's it.
Yes, it's worse than anyone could imagine. But that said, I'd like to offer some advice or answer any questions if anyone has any.
First thing. And only thing. If you know anyone who is dealing with this, a simple I'm thinking about you is nice. Don't say it's going to be hard. Or it must be hard. That is especially true on birthdays, christmas, father's day, anniversaries, actually any day. The reason for this is you can be having a good day, and then someone says it and you start to feel bad for having a good day. Both my older son and I felt this. Christmas is nice. Then we're told it must be hard, then it makes it hard.
That's my biggest piece of advice. For anyone going through this, my second piece of advice is recognize the depression when it comes. And it will. It sucks. But if you've never felt that type, you'll almost just feel hopeless. It's one of the stages of grief and it can come at any time.
That's it.