Long distance

[Pure_Joy]

Is anyone else in a long distance relationship? I won't see JW until around christmas, maybe. He is going to school in MN I am in MA it is hard. But it is good in someways too, is anyone in a long distance relationship and how are you keep in contact? I use Video chat just about everynight to talk and see each others faces.

 

[feesha]

Is anyone else in a long distance relationship? I won't see JW until around christmas, maybe. He is going to school in MN I am in MA it is hard. But it is good in someways too, is anyone in a long distance relationship and how are you keep in contact? I use Video chat just about everynight to talk and see each others faces.

Hi =)
I'm in a LDR also but the situation is a little different. In a year and 3 months we've seen each other for a total of 3 weeks. (around 20 days)
it is SO hard! we talk on the phone all the time and try to see each other as often as possible. it is difficult to keep hope that things will change. we go through some really rocky times. communication has gotten so much better with the advancement of technology.. but nothing compares to spending real time with your SO..

 

[QuantaCura]

My gf and I have been doing the LDR for about 9 months. We talk on the phone every night (thank God we have unlimited minutes T-Mobile to T-Mobile ). We also are reading a book together over the phone--although we are making really slow progress (we either never get to reading it or we get into a good discussion about it so we only finish a page or two ) We also write letters, emails, and send little gifts now and then. We see each other every couple months for a few days.

Honestly, things have been amazing. We have done the best a couple can possibly do given these circumstances. I think that having a Christ-centered relationship is how this is accomplished. A LDR is built hugely on trust as well.

There are benefits to this kind of relationship too--you really get to know someone well from talking to them so long--also, especially if you start out as an LDR (like we did), you don't get too blinded by physical attraction and affection . Affection and attraction are very good, but sometimes people can overlook serious personal incompatibilites if these two things are good. We have really been able to build our relationship from the heart outward.

Likewise, the temptation to just spend time together exclusively is not an issue--we both have plenty of time for family and friends and other activities while still maintaining a close and involved relationship. It's a good balance.

 

[feesha]

Honestly, things have been amazing. We have done the best a couple can possibly do given these circumstances. I think that having a Christ-centered relationship is how this is accomplished. A LDR is built hugely on trust as well.

ramble.

 

[QuantaCura]

after reading your post i think there is something wrong with the relationship i'm in. it's nice to read that someone in a relationship almost like mine is doing so well. the relationship i'm in right now is really unhealthy and now i think it doesn't have anything to do with distance.. although when we're actually around each other things seem fine.
ramble.

I'm sorry to hear that . I guess with all things we need to pray and discern God's will for us Praying for you sister

 

[feesha]

thank you

 

[Pure_Joy]

thank you

yes, My SO and I started out LD, kindof... interestingly enough, we were both Home Educated and lived accross the street from each othr, we both lived and worked at my christian camp. (my meaning, the one I live at) so 2 yrs after a attraction grew we entered a deeper relationship and h left for college a few weeks later. currently we are communicating well, over email videochat and aim, we both hate talking on the phone, but like the videochat... he is going through a hard time right now, because his grandmom died last night. I wish I could be there... sigh.

 

[Blank123]

yep I'm in an LDR right now and we're not going to see eachother until the very latest in February

I just gotta say - Thank God for MSN we talk on it all the time and we try to get on the phone when we can. but yeah.. I can't wait to actually be with him in person.

 

[intricatic]

yep I'm in an LDR right now and we're not going to see eachother until the very latest in February

I just gotta say - Thank God for MSN we talk on it all the time and we try to get on the phone when we can. but yeah.. I can't wait to actually be with him in person.

 

[plum]

I've been in my current LDR for over 2 years. And we only have the money to see each other every 6 months or more. I did not want another LDR (having had one before) and did not even want a boyfriend when he and I started talking again (by "again" i mean that he and i had known each other vaguely online since 1997 or so and in 2004 we started talking after about a 2 year absence).

Our relationship is a good one at this time. It wasn't always like that, but no relationship is perfect. We talk every day to connect and check in, and we try to have good discussions and conversations a few times a week. As we both work and have lives, this is a special concentration for us.

We chat online once in a while, but it doesn't measure up to connecting deeply with one another.

He is in the process of applying for jobs in my area and will be moving out here when G-d wills it. We are confident that G-d had this in His plans all along. "My area" is new to me too actually. I just moved from MI to IL a few months ago and he has been wanting to move to Chicago before I had even gotten my job in IL. So we see this as G-d's way of orchestrating His plan for us.

I think a healthy relationship involves being vulnerable, spiritually centered on G-d, and 110% honest at all times.

One good thing about LDRs is that they force you to talk things out Because the only way you can communicate is to talk . so if something happens, it makes you either resolve it or end it. I don't really see a middle ground there.

 

[modelchick]

My brother decided to join the Navy but then like a month before he left to bootcamp he met this girl and they are crazy about eachother. But in bootcamp my brother can't use the phone or they don't have a computer so the only thing he can do is write letters. So my brothers g/f is having such a hard time w/ it. She is always telling me how much she misses him n things like that. We are in Cali. and my brother is in Chicago so its pretty far. I think my brother is coming back for christmas so they won't be able to c eachother for 5 months.

 

[Hediru]

LDR's are survivable, and contrary to popular belief, they do work out! My bf and I are examples of this. We met in college during my freshman/his senior year. He graduated and went back home to Chicago while I stayed in WV for the rest of college. It was rough. We hardly saw each other, and during my senior year of college, we were often so busy that we didn't talk to each other even as much as we'd like to. All I can say is thank God for instant messengers, emails, and cell phones with free minutes. I don't think that we ever could have made it if it weren't for these miracles of technology.
After I graduated a year ago, I got a great job as a youth minister in PA. Last October, Steve got an apartment down the street from mine, and we have had almost a year of being a "normal" couple and we are still crazy about each other. We're making plans to go "take the next step" soon and get engaged. We couldn't be happier! He is the love of my life! Just wanted to give some hope to everyone in an LDR!

 

[Rin4Christ]

My fiance and I are long distance. He proposed to me 2 weeks before I left for graduate school and now we live halfway across the country from each other (he is in TX, I am in MD). We talk every night on the phone except when he is traveling for business (right now we are out of touch for 2 weeks). We manage to use video phone about once a week, but since he doesn't have Internet in his apt he can only video chat if he goes back to the office in the evening. We get to see each other more often than some LDR- we are aiming for every 5 weeks or so. We were semi-LD before we got engaged, because he worked in another city we only got to see each other on weekends- 2-3 times/month.

My only worry is how the double adjustment of seeing each other all the time and being newlyweds will be.

 

[christcentered]

We usually fly back and forth to see one another every other weekend or every third weekend. We talk on the phone almost every day, text message on our cell phones sometimes, email, and every now and then get an opportunity to IM during the day if I'm home & she has a few min. to spare at work. Snail mail (USPO) is also good though we've used that a lot less (sending small gifts).

 

[georgie2319]

Good luck hope it works out. I think it would be hard

 

[Inperfected]

Our LDR consisted of only texting for contact (and two 20 min phone calls!) for 3 months. We were engaged and I was in Africa... It was hard, but it was completely worth it.

 

[barefeetonholyground]

Not anymore. We were married in February. But I know it's hard. Keep praying and try doing devotionals together over the phone. You'll be surprized at how God will bring you together over any distance.

 

[QuantaCura]

Keep praying and try doing devotionals together over the phone. You'll be surprized at how God will bring you together over any distance.

I concur from experience

 

[~Lady Trekki~]

I just started talking with a wonderful man in Virginia, and I live in ND. He's such a great guy! We met through eharmony and have been talking on the phone almost every day the past month or so. I've never been in a relationship from this distance before, but I can definately see the benefits of it. Of course, it makes me want to see him as soon as we can arrange it...but the benefits are worth it.

 

[none the wiser]

yep I'm in an LDR right now and we're not going to see eachother until the very latest in February

I just gotta say - Thank God for MSN we talk on it all the time and we try to get on the phone when we can. but yeah.. I can't wait to actually be with him in person.

*tiiiiight hugs* I am also in an LDR, and I can't imagine going until February. I haveta wait until December to see my boyfriend (we're spending Christmas and New Year's together ) and I just saw him in August...we're both going nuts. lol. We also use msn, and if you can, a webcam also helps so much. We say goodnight on the phone every night, so that's nice too.

My anniversary is today actually A whole year we've been together, and we've been best friends for about 1.5. I've known him for 2 years in November, and he lives in PA, and I'm in SC. 600 miles *smacks all the states in between*

What's funny is we said we loved each other in September, but we didn't get to meet each other until May, and didn't really get to spend proper time together until August...it's so much harder now that I know what I'm missing lol.

He's so totally worth it though. Perfect for me in every aspect I can think of.