Lonely and bored

[pantingdeer]

I’ve been here on this forum for about 5 years.
My original post was about how my attraction to women seemed to just disappear. It never returned unfortunately and so I still feel empty inside.
I also stopped finding lots of things interesting and thought “what’s the point?” about everything.
I now 5 years on am very lonely and have no interest in what to do in my life. I don’t seem to really like anything anymore and can’t even make simple decisions because I can’t tell what I even enjoy anymore.

I also don’t really have feelings for anyone. I don’t like anyone. I can accept my family but I can’t even really tell if I like them. When they tell me they love me I don’t say anything back because I can’t be sure it’s true.

With everything going on in the world right now I’ve only left my house maybe 2 times in past ~ 2 months so I’m even more bored than normal.

I hope my feelings and enjoyment come back.

 

[Tigger45]

Sounds like it could be depression buddy. It wouldn’t hurt seeing a therapist.

 

[pantingdeer]

Sounds like it could be depression buddy. It wouldn’t hurt seeing a therapist.

What would they do and how would that help?

 

[Tigger45]

Talking to a therapist might bring clarity and healing.

 

[pantingdeer]

Sounds like it could be depression buddy. It wouldn’t hurt seeing a therapist.

I don’t think I’m depressed. I don’t feel sad all the time. Just not a lot of happy.

 

[Tigger45]

You could be right and a good therapist could properly diagnose your situation.

 

[jacks]

Here is a good overview of different therapies for depression. Depression doesn't mean you feel sad all the time, lack of enjoyment of things is one of the symptoms. If you read about the the different types of therapies (hit the "more" link) it might shed some light on how you are feeling. Praying for you.

 

[Cormack]

I think people are often too quick to diagnose depression or some other extreme condition to explain away simple things like being sad, or feeling lonely, or dread.

In a twisted way imo that type of advice elevates and increases the persons feelings of anxiety, it leads to the lonely person thinking “what’s wrong with me?”

But there’s nothing “wrong” with the person feeling sad, it’s just a sad feeling caused by circumstances, an undesirable circumstances, to beat that we need to take back power and make a plan.

 

[Lost4words]

Dont go through this on your own my friend.

Firstly, have a chat with your doctor, just to rule out depression etc etc. No harm in doing that. I suffer with depression and anxiety. Been on meds for 17+ years.

Secondly, put all of your trust in Jesus. Lay all your concerns and feelings at His feet. Open up your heart to Him. Stay close to Him. He is there with open arms.

Thirdly, we are all your friends here. You will never be alone.

God bless you

 

[Cormack]

Firstly, have a chat with your doctor, just to rule out depression etc etc. No harm in doing that.

I can imagine some harm to it. If people were on some kind of amber alert around their feelings everyday, so that they’re always off to the doctors, first off they waste their doctors time routinely.

His hours or resources aren’t infinite, so for every moment mr feeling blue “just to be safe” is there, he’s taking time away from someone who actually requires medical help.

Not to mention the psychological harm being done to people who are encouraged to entertain the idea that there’s something going deeply wrong inside their head.

For a third option, if everybody was a “just to be safe” type, we’d have a lot more people put on medications they don’t need.

A whole generation of young men now protest the cocktail of drugs proscription happy doctors put them on to control their supposed disorders.

Antibiotics in the general population are less effective when we are always off to the doctors too.

So I think there’s a lot of harm that could be done, especially when the man himself says he doesn’t think he’s depressed.

On the plus side those second and third points are bang on. Talking does wonders, we try to jazz it up by terms like talk therapy etc, but it’s just being able to speak our minds and express our struggles.

I hope both our views help Andrew out, God bless mate!

 

[Lost4words]

I can imagine some harm to it. If people were on some kind of amber alert around their feelings everyday, so that they’re always off to the doctors, first off they waste their doctors time routinely.

His hours or resources aren’t infinite, so for every moment mr feeling blue “just to be safe” is there, he’s taking time away from someone who actually requires medical help.

Not to mention the psychological harm being done to people who are encouraged to entertain the idea that there’s something going deeply wrong inside their head.

For a third option, if everybody was a “just to be safe” type, we’d have a lot more people put on medications they don’t need.

A whole generation of young men now protest the cocktail of drugs proscription happy doctors put them on to control their supposed disorders.

Antibiotics in the general population are less effective when we are always off to the doctors too.

So I think there’s a lot of harm that could be done, especially when the man himself says he doesn’t think he’s depressed.

On the plus side those second and third points are bang on. Talking does wonders, we try to jazz it up by terms like talk therapy etc, but it’s just being able to speak our minds and express our struggles.

I hope both our views help Andrew out, God bless mate!

Thing is, the OP has been in this stuation for 5 years. He needs to seek other advice, professional advice as some issues can be deep seated. Nothing wrong at all in discussing these things with a doctor.

 

[pantingdeer]

Thanks everyone for your messages. I’m not very sad person but I just wonder why all my feelings disappeared.

 

[Unqualified]

It might be a coping mechanism. How is your faith and church? Have you been rejected by a woman or anyone? Is your job boring? Do you watch a lot of tv? These are things to tell someone about who can help, if your worried.

 

[SANTOSO]

I’ve been here on this forum for about 5 years.
My original post was about how my attraction to women seemed to just disappear. It never returned unfortunately and so I still feel empty inside.
I also stopped finding lots of things interesting and thought “what’s the point?” about everything.
I now 5 years on am very lonely and have no interest in what to do in my life. I don’t seem to really like anything anymore and can’t even make simple decisions because I can’t tell what I even enjoy anymore.

I also don’t really have feelings for anyone. I don’t like anyone. I can accept my family but I can’t even really tell if I like them. When they tell me they love me I don’t say anything back because I can’t be sure it’s true.

With everything going on in the world right now I’ve only left my house maybe 2 times in past ~ 2 months so I’m even more bored than normal.

I hope my feelings and enjoyment come back.

Dear brother,
Release forgiveness daily to whom may have wrong you in the past.
Though you may not have feelings, release forgiveness to whom may have wronged you in the past.
Seek daily the Lord’s mercy.
Set your mind on the steadfast love of the Lord and His compassion that are new every morning.
Trust in the Lord can do mighty works in your life.
Renew your mind with God’s words.
Trust Him that He will instruct in the way you should go.
May God’s grace and peace be yours in full measure.