You are focusing on your condition, not on dependence on Christ. I gave some concrete advise but you went back to your condition. It is not just reading the Bible but WHERE you are reading, so that the Holy Spirit can bring greater conviction. I agree with another poster you haven't committed the unpardonable sin. That is a lie from the devil, to try & get you to give up or harm yourself. 'He is a murderer from the beginning & the father of lies. He comes to 'kill, steal & destroy.' He is your true enemy. It is he that you must resist, putting on the whole armor of God.
You can mentally go through the armor of God in Ephesians 6, putting it on. That is a good practice each day.
Have you submitted yourself to spiritual authority & leadership to help you walk through this time of difficulty? That shows you are serious in dealing with it & you will be amazed at having the power of prayer & support of those who are concerned with helping you & the 'effectual fervent prayers of a righteous man have great power in their results.' If two or more of you agree on what they ask, it will be given them.'
Have you been reading Romans six through eight each day? Have you been reading Psalm 51 & 32 each day? Have you sought to remove the 'provisions' so that you can't keep fulfilling the desires of your flesh? What have you done to do this?
There must be a COST on your part & sacrifice. If inappropriate contentography is a problem, then you buy software to keep you from accessing those sites & the password is given to another person so you can't go & change the settings.
The next step you need to do is deny your flesh & get your focus off of it. This involves extended time in fasting & prayer. You will have to set aside several weekends for example to start, fasting during this time & going to a place where you won't have distractions. It is amazing what happens when you do this.
You have given the devil 'FOOTHOLDS' in your life. (Ephesians 4:26,27)
"In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry & do not give the devil a foothold.
The Greek word for foothold is a military term, where an enemy establishes a
'beachhead' & takes a beginning ground, from which to launch attacks. You have allowed these footholds, these beachheads, these grounds in your life from which the enemy of your soul launches his fiery darts & arrows. You must take back this ground you have given away.
When my heart was callous toward the Lord one time, I took extended time (25 days fasting) waiting on the Lord, listening. God was faithful & showed me specific things that must change & He 'granted repentance that led to the acknowledging of the truth.'
Isaiah 58:1-12
“Cry aloud; do not hold back;
lift up your voice like a trumpet;
declare to my people their transgression,
to the house of Jacob their sins.
2Yet they seek me daily
and delight to know my ways,
as if they were a nation that did righteousness
and did not forsake the judgment of their God;
they ask of me righteous judgments;
they delight to draw near to God.
3‘Why have we fasted, and you see it not?
Why have we humbled ourselves, and you take no knowledge of it?’
Behold, in the day of your fast you seek your own pleasure,
a
and oppress all your workers.
4Behold, you fast only to quarrel and to fight
and to hit with a wicked fist.
Fasting like yours this day
will not make your voice to be heard on high.
5Is such the fast that I choose,
a day for a person to humble himself?
Is it to bow down his head like a reed,
and to spread sackcloth and ashes under him?
Will you call this a fast,
and a day acceptable to the Lord?
6“Is not this the fast that I choose:
to loose the bonds of wickedness,
to undo the straps of the yoke,
to let the oppressed
b go free,
and to break every yoke?
7Is it not to share your bread with the hungry
and bring the homeless poor into your house;
when you see the naked, to cover him,
and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?
8Then shall your light break forth like the dawn,
and your healing shall spring up speedily;
your righteousness shall go before you;
the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.
9Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;
you shall cry, and he will say, ‘Here I am.’
If you take away the yoke from your midst,
the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
10if you pour yourself out for the hungry
and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
then shall your light rise in the darkness
and your gloom be as the noonday.
11And the Lord will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.
12And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;
you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
you shall be called the repairer of the breach,
the restorer of streets to dwell in.
When you fast & during this time, you volunteer to help others, work in soup lines, go down to the local gospel mission or go with a team to minister to prisoners in jail or work with those going into the slums & dealing with helping addicts & alcoholics, who have been bound with the cords of their sin. You see what has happened to them, having gone much farther than you.
It develops GENUINE COMPASSION for others & gets your eyes off yourself. Sign up this week or go with someone to the local gospel mission & offer your services.