It's a question of lust...

[erealmz]

Guys, there's this girl that I don't really like okay? But she is there and she likes me. So........... Sometimes I feel like taking a boat trip down the river with her. And she has already expressed the same desires towards me. The problem is, I don't want it to turn into anything more. I don't want her calling me everyday. I don't want her bugging me. I don't want her getting all jealous if I talk to other girls. And I don't want a relationship. But this little river rafting adventure would probably seal the deal in her mind. And so that is the only thing that stops me from doing it.

But sometimes I feel lonely and I feel like hitting the waters. And I consider giving her a call to come on over. But before my feelings get the best of me, I decide that it wouldn't be a good idea and so I don't call her. Yet as long as she remains in my life, I can't help but wonder what this boat trip would be like with her and I often entertain the thoughts of pursuing it. So it's a struggle that I'm going through. I know I shouldn't give in to my desires for the benefit of both of us [staff edit], sometimes this is just really hard and I come very close to calling her over. Maybe I should just cut her out of my life. I don't know. Thoughts?

 

[Goatee]

Waw, very difficult to live with lust. I know myself.

As I am typing this I am lusting over the lovely lady I committed adultery with! So very difficult to deal with.

I keep failing though and getting together with her.

 

[timewerx]

Sometimes I feel like taking a boat trip down the river with her. And she has already expressed the same desires towards me. The problem is, I don't want it to turn into anything more.

You'll just cause her much pain if you go through with this so DON'T! Leave her alone!

 

[Sabertooth]

@erealmz , from my perspective, you have two problems: the why's & wherefores of sexual ethics and the state of your heart (overall).

Say your problem is illicit drug addiction, instead of lust. If you willfully refrain from feeding that addiction, your body will be healthier for it, but your addictive tendencies would find expression in other unhealthy (if not illegal) pursuits, like tobacco, excessive sugar, excessive caffeine, excessive alcohol, etc.

I can tell you that refraining from fornication/promiscuity will have immediate health benefits (for both of you) physically, sexually & psychologically, too, but if you don't address the source of that appetite,* it will be a recurring problem for you, also. Her likelihood to want a more permanent arrangement is a natural response to sexual intimacy, no matter how stoic one believes themselves to be. (That is one of the reasons God constrained human sexuality to marriage.)

*Not that for married sex, but the inclusion of illicit sex.

 

[xianghua]

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[AservantofGodandthelordJC]

Guys, there's this girl that I don't really like okay? But she is there and she likes me. So........... Sometimes I feel like taking a boat trip down the river with her. And she has already expressed the same desires towards me. The problem is, I don't want it to turn into anything more. I don't want her calling me everyday. I don't want her bugging me. I don't want her getting all jealous if I talk to other girls. And I don't want a relationship. But this little river rafting adventure would probably seal the deal in her mind. And so that is the only thing that stops me from doing it.

But sometimes I feel lonely and I feel like hitting the waters. And I consider giving her a call to come on over. But before my feelings get the best of me, I decide that it wouldn't be a good idea and so I don't call her. Yet as long as she remains in my life, I can't help but wonder what this boat trip would be like with her and I often entertain the thoughts of pursuing it. So it's a struggle that I'm going through. I know I shouldn't give in to my desires for the benefit of both of us [staff edit], sometimes this is just really hard and I come very close to calling her over. Maybe I should just cut her out of my life. I don't know. Thoughts?

Simply be upfront and tell her you're not interested in her but if she wants to take a boat trip with you she can. There is no need to be deceitful, that is the part that would be wrong.