I feel like God is punishing me with singleness. In college I had random encounters with women but it never felt right. It was just what everybody else was doing. After 5 intimate encounters I just stopped dating altogether. I repented and am now a born again fundamental Christian now but I feel so isolated. I haven’t had a girlfriend since I was 20 and I’m now 27. I wish I could take it all back and have stayed true to Christ but it’s too late. How can I date any girl when I’m stained like this. When I was a virgin, I didn’t want to date a girl that wasn’t and I wouldn’t want to ruin the life of a girl now who had stayed pure for Christ. I don’t deserve her and she doesn’t deserve me.
When I go to church, it’s as if I’m a leper because everybody my age is married. I don’t belong in the college singles crowd but I’m too young to be in the over 30. I’m tired of being a third wheel so going out with married couples is just a lesson in depression. I’m very mature in my faith and know the scriptures. I go to traditional churches but of course there’s nobody my age there because they’re all in seeker friendly churches. For those who think I’m “overlooking a good girl somewhere in my life, there are NONE in my church. The “myth” that that are no single men in the church and it’s all pretty young women waiting for suitors is false. There’s 10 single guys in my Bible study. I don’t want to go there just to meet girls my age because they won’t be spiritually mature. Some claim to be Christians but are still harlots. Why should I compromise on my congregational choices?
I can’t stand the sermons that are always about being married and “how difficult it is to resist temptation.” It makes me so angry because if I could only be in a relationship I would do anything to make it work. Those that think it’s too hard to make their marriage work should try being single for 7+ years. Or even 1 year! I don’t want to hear that these selfish people are tempted to cheat when they don’t even know how good they have it. Especially if they have children!
Im a good looking guy, fit and I make good money. It’s the mans job to seek a wife so maybe it’s my fault I haven’t found one yet. Here’s my main problem with dating. I know God is not concerned with who we date as long as they are a Christian. What I mean is, there are no such things as “soul mates.” Theres is no perfect person out there for us. When we get married, we are to make it work. That being said, I wish my dates were more structured. I wish we could go back to parents getting together and suggesting good dating partners for their children. That’s not an option for me because my parents don’t really go to church or have friends like that. But it was so much easier back when there were less denominations and churches only split up when they were too big to hold everybody.
So it’s almost as if I just have to use dating websites and “pick” one of the girls on there. Obviously that’s not exactly how it goes but I get along with a lot of people so it’d be like I marry the first girl I get along well with. I don’t know anybody who has gotten married through a dating app though. They’ve all been through fate and they make perfect couples. I have more secular friends than Christian friends because they think there’s something wrong with me because I am single. I agree with them, I’m a failure.
Being single is NOT a blessing! It doesn’t say that ANYWHERE in the Bible! I don’t care what Paul said, he had to be single in order to be a good apostle in his situation. I want to be married. Don’t tell me to enjoy being single because it’s been almost a decade. People should not lie to themselves, there’s no biblical basis for remaining single in order to get a good career or to explore the world before settling down like all the millennials do nowadays. That’s a good way to end up single forever as well when all the good men and women are taken. All those youthful adventures won’t comfort you in your old age. The secular world has ruined people’s lives, especially women, by telling them to focus on career and start families later. Man was not made to be alone.
Basically, I feel like I ruined those girls lives and my own through fornication and will be single forever now. I had my chance with my past girlfriends so why do I deserve another?
When I go to church, it’s as if I’m a leper because everybody my age is married. I don’t belong in the college singles crowd but I’m too young to be in the over 30. I’m tired of being a third wheel so going out with married couples is just a lesson in depression. I’m very mature in my faith and know the scriptures. I go to traditional churches but of course there’s nobody my age there because they’re all in seeker friendly churches. For those who think I’m “overlooking a good girl somewhere in my life, there are NONE in my church. The “myth” that that are no single men in the church and it’s all pretty young women waiting for suitors is false. There’s 10 single guys in my Bible study. I don’t want to go there just to meet girls my age because they won’t be spiritually mature. Some claim to be Christians but are still harlots. Why should I compromise on my congregational choices?
I can’t stand the sermons that are always about being married and “how difficult it is to resist temptation.” It makes me so angry because if I could only be in a relationship I would do anything to make it work. Those that think it’s too hard to make their marriage work should try being single for 7+ years. Or even 1 year! I don’t want to hear that these selfish people are tempted to cheat when they don’t even know how good they have it. Especially if they have children!
Im a good looking guy, fit and I make good money. It’s the mans job to seek a wife so maybe it’s my fault I haven’t found one yet. Here’s my main problem with dating. I know God is not concerned with who we date as long as they are a Christian. What I mean is, there are no such things as “soul mates.” Theres is no perfect person out there for us. When we get married, we are to make it work. That being said, I wish my dates were more structured. I wish we could go back to parents getting together and suggesting good dating partners for their children. That’s not an option for me because my parents don’t really go to church or have friends like that. But it was so much easier back when there were less denominations and churches only split up when they were too big to hold everybody.
So it’s almost as if I just have to use dating websites and “pick” one of the girls on there. Obviously that’s not exactly how it goes but I get along with a lot of people so it’d be like I marry the first girl I get along well with. I don’t know anybody who has gotten married through a dating app though. They’ve all been through fate and they make perfect couples. I have more secular friends than Christian friends because they think there’s something wrong with me because I am single. I agree with them, I’m a failure.
Being single is NOT a blessing! It doesn’t say that ANYWHERE in the Bible! I don’t care what Paul said, he had to be single in order to be a good apostle in his situation. I want to be married. Don’t tell me to enjoy being single because it’s been almost a decade. People should not lie to themselves, there’s no biblical basis for remaining single in order to get a good career or to explore the world before settling down like all the millennials do nowadays. That’s a good way to end up single forever as well when all the good men and women are taken. All those youthful adventures won’t comfort you in your old age. The secular world has ruined people’s lives, especially women, by telling them to focus on career and start families later. Man was not made to be alone.
Basically, I feel like I ruined those girls lives and my own through fornication and will be single forever now. I had my chance with my past girlfriends so why do I deserve another?
