Is "Romanticism" destructive?

[Not David]

Looking backward when I was younger (yeah, when I was still a teenager), I liked a lot of girls but currently, I feel they didn't have anything to apport to the relationship except beauty and charm. Have you ever thought that you could be romanticizing someone in a "Disney style" but that they could be terrible partners and even destroy your goal in life?

 

[public hermit]

It doesn't matter how beautiful and charming a potential partner is, once the initial warm fuzzies wear off it becomes work. More than once, I have changed "life goals" over relationships. I won't say changing a life goal is not worth it, depends on the situation, but I would be very careful. If you have a life goal that means a lot to you (my humble suggestion is) you should pursue that goal and avoid any relationship that might interfere. Once you get off course, it is sometimes impossible to get back on track. And more, you may begin to resent that other person because you didn't pursue your goal. If you have a life goal, and it means that much to you, there will be someone out there who will go down that road with you. Be patient...and very wise.

But, yes, I think I know what you're getting at and I have done it.

 

[bekkilyn]

Drat, and here I thought this thread was going to be yet another rant against Lord Byron and his ilk.

(But yes, it's not typically wise to be in the habit of judging books by their covers, so to speak.)

 

[Not David]

Drat, and here I thought this thread was going to be yet another rant against Lord Byron and his ilk.

(But yes, it's not typically wise to be in the habit of judging books by their covers, so to speak.)

Haven't heard of him, but like Batman says...
I'll be the judge of that.

 

[bekkilyn]

Haven't heard of him, but like Batman says...
I'll be the judge of that.
View attachment 262342

Lord Byron in Romanticism

 

[bèlla]

Yes, it’s possible to be blinded by the idealized person we’re imagining and lose touch with what matters most and compromise ourselves in the process.

 

[Sketcher]

Oh, yes. Though I make it a point to not put them on a pedestal.

 

[Miles]

When it's misplaced or misdirected, which seems to be the case more often than not, it can be quite destructive. That's why we're to guard our heart.

 

[timewerx]

Looking backward when I was younger (yeah, when I was still a teenager), I liked a lot of girls but currently, I feel they didn't have anything to apport to the relationship except beauty and charm. Have you ever thought that you could be romanticizing someone in a "Disney style" but that they could be terrible partners and even destroy your goal in life?

Avoid conceited and covetous ones and you're set.

Those are the only types that are trouble. They envy their "more successful" friends and covet their success. Very often they are overcome by worldliness and complain a lot.

 

[Noxot]

One of the torments of reality is the gulf between realism and idealism. I don't think romance is always a bad thing but it has to be actualized by both parties. There is always something missing in one sided love. Even God's love alone is not enough for the Kingdom of Heaven to be since he wants us to be in the Kingdom.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

I'd say everyone does this until they mature to the point of realizing looks don't make the whole package when it comes to a long term relationships.