Is marriage a good thing? Why people talk so badly about married life?

[NothingIsImpossible]

Marriage is talked about badly because people are eager to divorce once they marry over any little problem. No one takes the bible seriously anymore on the issue. And this does mean marrying is more risky since people will leave more easily. But its still a risk worth taking because when you really love someone, nothing is impossible and some people will stick with you until the end of time.

 

[Jenniferdiana]

i am afraid of marriage and everything that comes with it.. and i dont feel mature enough to be married to anybody.

 

[Felipe Barbosa]

i am afraid of marriage and everything that comes with it.. and i dont feel mature enough to be married to anybody.

Me too. However, I feel very ashamed of my body and its reactions, I can not pray comfortably, even if everyone says that certain body reactions are normal.

It also has the financial and emotional issue, however I ended up meeting a girl and I think if I leave her I will not find another person who is honest and who likes me (I'm a nerd, I'm naturally repulsive to most girls).

 

[Christobul]

That is not the only reason to marry, but it is an enjoyable and important part of most marriages.

I am sorry your parents’ marriage did not provide a positive example of married life for you. I committed to my wife a long time ago, have been married 23 years, and it (and she) has been a huge blessing in my life. I am more and more joyful about my relationship daily, and love my wife dearly (even during our times of hardship, of which we have had our fair share). The responsibility of both marriage and parenthood are the hardest things I have ever taken on, but are also the things that have filled me with the most joy over the years. There is a cost to marriage, but the benefits (for me) have far exceeded that cost...in comfort, companionship, the absence of loneliness...
I have never considered myself handsome, and have had the same temptations as anyone else. Marriage provided a blessed outlet for my sexual desires. I didn’t have many girlfriends, but I found the only one that mattered I needed the end - my wife.
They probably don’t advice because many of them (like myself) didn’t overcome it themselves when younger. I have no advice, but I will pray for you. Some married people only complain about their lives. Marriage is a blessing, but it takes hard work, self-sacrifice, and love (see 1 Corinthians 13) to make it work. It is not easy, but it can be worth it.

It sounds like your issues are as much about avoiding sinful sexual thoughts and actions, while recognizing that marriage is a big commitment, which you may not be ready for. Pray, focus on God, and I will pray for you. I have no other advice, as I wasn’t “pure” in any sense in my youth. I thank God that He is forgiving and can overcome any sin. I didn’t see that my sexual sin hurt anyone in my youth; it has only been with age that I realize deep within that I grieved the Lord and, in essence, cheated on my wife with every sexual encounter I had (even before I met her).

May God be with you.

Sorry I would love it if I could tell you that marriage was some party that never quit, But it's not. We pick partners these days based on want. But in the days of scripture it was much different. Most marriage was with parental arrangements or approval, and had some form of contract. These days it highly favors women. You essentially sign away any real authority to the woman and hope the stays good. I am NOT against marriage. I just think men have to say no right now and be

 

[Christobul]

Praying for marriage.

Simply put why would good want you to marry someone that could drain you financially, use you up and walk away. Plus steal you kids from you. It's risk vs reward, the math doesn't work anymore.sorry.

 

[“Paisios”]

Praying for marriage.

Simply put why would good want you to marry someone that could drain you financially, use you up and walk away. Plus steal you kids from you. It's risk vs reward, the math doesn't work anymore.sorry.

If you have been in that situation, I am sorry that you had to face such things, and I will pray for you.

Everything in life is a risk and a gamble, or a matter of faith, and I feel blessed that I have had a wonderful person with whom to share my thoughts, worries, joys and life. Sometimes it’s hard. I agree when you said “I would love it if I could tell you that marriage is a party that never quit, but it isn’t”. But my wife and I have been fortunate enough to face the hard times together, and come through it stronger. I recognize that is not always the case, and I pray for those for whom it is not, and feel ever more grateful that God has been kind to us.

 

[Christobul]

I come at it from a different set of experience than most these people. Marriage is not the benefit to men that it once was. Women do not need them to protect them anymore, police do this. They don't need financial stability, welfare does this. They do not need a father at home, daycare and social programs do this. True men pay the lions share of taxes, but women don't need men's permission to use it. Marriage was a good thing, but if you can control yourself, you should stay single, do God's work alone. Focus on staying away from lustful things.

 

[Felipe Barbosa]

I come at it from a different set of experience than most these people. Marriage is not the benefit to men that it once was. Women do not need them to protect them anymore, police do this. They don't need financial stability, welfare does this. They do not need a father at home, daycare and social programs do this. True men pay the lions share of taxes, but women don't need men's permission to use it. Marriage was a good thing, but if you can control yourself, you should stay single, do God's work alone. Focus on staying away from lustful things.

Actually, I would like to feel nothing for women, but my goal is not noble, I do not think so much about God's work, it would be more to end up my father, when I see my father I even want to cut my organ off just to have no risk of getting married ...

 

[Felipe Barbosa]

When I was a teenager I prayed a lot for God to take away my feelings for the girls, but it never happened. Today I date, I like her very much, but marriage seems more of a punishment to men.

Women want to get married, have the dream of having children and a house, but at the same time they do not like sex, we men have that impulse, I'm tired of hearing that marriage is where you do not have sex.

Seriously, I'm tired of it, I did not ask to have the desires and urges I have, if I could get it out of me.

I wonder why God made men and women so different, I know that the world is corrupted and gets worse with time, but it is frustrating.

 

[Andrew77]

Hi, sorry for my English.
My name is Felipe/Philip, I have been a Christian since I was born, I am 24 years old, I am single and I am currently dating.

1. Every time I hear 1 Corinthians 7:9 I have a bad impression, to marry just to have sex, even though I realize that was not what Paul meant.
2. Every time I hear someone preaching about marriage, it always gets a bigger weight on the negatives aspects, in fact, looking at my parents I have no desire to marry. The world is also in this vibe lately, marriage is really a bad thing. I do not know if you can understand me, people talk a lot about the responsibility of marriage, the question is, is responsibility a bad thing? How the elders expect the youngs to marry and leave their parents' house if they only know speak that marriage is a bad thing, or at least that's the impression convey to the youth.
   
3. I was never be handsome, I was fat at school, but I still end up liking some girls I remember praying several times for those feelings to go away, but they always came, same for the body sexual reactions.
4. I do not see a solution to the sexual issue as a single, I feel ashamed of the nocturnal emissions and the erections, I can stay a while if I touch, but the longer I stay, the worse it gets, the feelings are very bad, the region is sensitive and emissions come almost every night. It does not have anything to do with inappropriate contentography, when it all started I did not have access to the internet. My girlfriend also has the same problem with certain periods in the month in which the libido increases. I've already talked to several older people in the church about my problem with the body's sensations, but the advice is always empty, it seems they do not care. Or they forgot what it's like to be single.
   
5. I'm very confused, "Is better to marry than to burn with passion", but marriage is not just for sex. Marriage is a blessing, but married people only complain about their lives. Marriage is a big responsibility, so why does our body develop sexually so soon? Why do not we get into puberty at the age of 20, 25? People were getting married early centuries ago, but today people say that young people do not have the maturity to do so...

Thanks in advance.

Mentally people are able to be married at age 16, if they are mature enough.

The problem is, parents do not teach their kids maturity. They don't teach their kids responsibility.

If you never teach your kids responsibility, they could be 50 years old, and not able to handle being married.

If you DO teach your kids responsibility, they will be ready in their teens, and 20s to be married.

Maturity is not a matter of age. It's a matter of being ready for responsibility.

If you don't think so, look at the military. Teens and 20s, being taught to handle million dollar equipment, and handle death and life. When you teach them, they can learn it, no matter the age.

The problem is simply that people don't teach responsibility.

Marriage is almost universally a good thing. Married people live longer. Married people do better in school. Married people do better in their career. Married people have fewer mental illness, drugs problems, criminal problems. Married people almost universally, do better on average in every single aspect of life, than non-married people.

So my advise is simple and direct. Quit masturbating, quit the inappropriate content, find a wife, and get married. Learn to love the woman.

That's my advice.

 

[Christobul]

Actually, I would like to feel nothing for women, but my goal is not noble, I do not think so much about God's work, it would be more to end up my father, when I see my father I even want to cut my organ off just to have no risk of getting married ...

Well don't cut anything off. Pray that you find strength. When you meet a woman be upfront about your feelings and expectations. When she tells you what she is looking for in a man, cut her off and tell her that you are not interested in fitting her expectations. Tell her you belong to God first, any woman must serve God then her husband. This attraction to women is so that we bind ourselves to one for life. Do not be ashamed of it.

 

[Christobul]

Hi, sorry for my English.
My name is Felipe/Philip, I have been a Christian since I was born, I am 24 years old, I am single and I am currently dating.

1. Every time I hear 1 Corinthians 7:9 I have a bad impression, to marry just to have sex, even though I realize that was not what Paul meant.
2. Every time I hear someone preaching about marriage, it always gets a bigger weight on the negatives aspects, in fact, looking at my parents I have no desire to marry. The world is also in this vibe lately, marriage is really a bad thing. I do not know if you can understand me, people talk a lot about the responsibility of marriage, the question is, is responsibility a bad thing? How the elders expect the youngs to marry and leave their parents' house if they only know speak that marriage is a bad thing, or at least that's the impression convey to the youth.
   
3. I was never be handsome, I was fat at school, but I still end up liking some girls I remember praying several times for those feelings to go away, but they always came, same for the body sexual reactions.
4. I do not see a solution to the sexual issue as a single, I feel ashamed of the nocturnal emissions and the erections, I can stay a while if I touch, but the longer I stay, the worse it gets, the feelings are very bad, the region is sensitive and emissions come almost every night. It does not have anything to do with inappropriate contentography, when it all started I did not have access to the internet. My girlfriend also has the same problem with certain periods in the month in which the libido increases. I've already talked to several older people in the church about my problem with the body's sensations, but the advice is always empty, it seems they do not care. Or they forgot what it's like to be single.
   
5. I'm very confused, "Is better to marry than to burn with passion", but marriage is not just for sex. Marriage is a blessing, but married people only complain about their lives. Marriage is a big responsibility, so why does our body develop sexually so soon? Why do not we get into puberty at the age of 20, 25? People were getting married early centuries ago, but today people say that young people do not have the maturity to do so...

Thanks in advance.

Paul was talking about men that feel they must marry. As far as your salvation what happens when you sleep does not affect your salvation. I too have this issue. It may never go away for us, but the more I train my mind the less it happens and when it does I experience no guilt. Maybe embarrassed. Lol. Pray continuously, focus on friendships with women. Don't go on dates, train your body and mind to God's will. Work on your career. God has the plan pray for guidance and know he is there.