Is it over?

[Christgirl67]

.

 

[Halbhh]

So,I have a friend that works at my job.We no longer hang out because we both work different hours.So now the only thing we can do is text each other.I will admit when people do not answer my text messages,I assume they are ignoring me and I get mad and send a angry text.The last time I did this to my friend,they said we need to not talk for a while.Does this mean the friendship is over?If not,I am choosing to end the friendship because I apologized for my behavior ,but I have been a bad friend to this person,and I do not want to cause them any problems.

Many of us have been there, and speaking from experience, everything changed for the better in profound ways when I finally began to put first the "greatest commandment" as Christ told us --
37 Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment.
39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

First, totally first and foremost is to love God (spend time doing it, with all else put aside) with all you've got. And then, after, come the love one another things of all our relationships.

Now, the wonderful thing is, that when I began to do the greatest commandment, then the 2nd commandment -- our relationships -- become better and easier and more love filled. That's what happened to me. Suddenly I had more to give, and felt loved even when they couldn't give me anything, because He is giving me love, and my heart became more opened to His love.

 

[timewerx]

So,I have a friend that works at my job.We no longer hang out because we both work different hours.So now the only thing we can do is text each other.I will admit when people do not answer my text messages,I assume they are ignoring me and I get mad and send a angry text.The last time I did this to my friend,they said we need to not talk for a while.Does this mean the friendship is over?If not,I am choosing to end the friendship because I apologized for my behavior ,but I have been a bad friend to this person,and I do not want to cause them any problems.

Never send an angry text to anyone even if they seem ignoring you.

They might see you as a "clingy" or "needy" person and may eventually completely avoid you.

You may apologize but only once and don't send any follow up messages if they don't / never reply.

 

[Christgirl67]

Thank you both.I just feel like I really messed up this time,I feel really guilty and embarrassed.

 

[Christgirl67]

Its just so difficult because I have a few friends,but I can only keep up with them through text message since I cannot drive.I am just losing motivation for trying to do my school work and my job.I just want someone to talk to.

 

[akaDaScribe]

Thank you both.I just feel like I really messed up this time,I feel really guilty and embarrassed.

No worries
live and learn

 

[Brian Mcnamee]

hi one thing to learn is what is love. Go ahead and study this and meditate on what the Bible says is love.
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned,[fn] but have not love, it profits me nothing.
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails.

So in your situation you acted rudely and were seeking for yourself. You were not patient or kind. Now if you want to love your friend you have to change how you approach reconciliation. You have to suffer long, be patient not behave rudely. Time will present you another opportunity to see this person. And perhaps if this is how you are living your life her and others will see these qualities in you. My wife is very popular and she is very selfless. She really loves others and for some reason the reaction of other people is to love her too. This is what being a mature Christian is about is understanding the difference between our natural fallen nature and choosing to live in the spiritual one by walking in the Spirit of God. Gods ways are higher and better than our own. We mush choose to seek those higher ways to free ourself from ourselves and Jesus will transform us. In your case I imagine this is one incident that points to a more important issue and you can choose for yourself what you will place your time and energy into becoming what type of person you want to be. You cannot mature without thinking praying and making new choices. God bless you.

 

[akaDaScribe]

Its just so difficult because I have a few friends,but I can only keep up with them through text message since I cannot drive.I am just losing motivation for trying to do my school work and my job.I just want someone to talk to.

Coming here was probably a good Idea if you like to talk... well text... well type... you know what I mean

 

[Christgirl67]

hi one thing to learn is what is love. Go ahead and study this and meditate on what the Bible says is love.
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned,[fn] but have not love, it profits me nothing.
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails.

So in your situation you acted rudely and were seeking for yourself. You were not patient or kind. Now if you want to love your friend you have to change how you approach reconciliation. You have to suffer long, be patient not behave rudely. Time will present you another opportunity to see this person. And perhaps if this is how you are living your life her and others will see these qualities in you. My wife is very popular and she is very selfless. She really loves others and for some reason the reaction of other people is to love her too. This is what being a mature Christian is about is understanding the difference between our natural fallen nature and choosing to live in the spiritual one by walking in the Spirit of God. Gods ways are higher and better than our own. We mush choose to seek those higher ways to free ourself from ourselves and Jesus will transform us. In your case I imagine this is one incident that points to a more important issue and you can choose for yourself what you will place your time and energy into becoming what type of person you want to be. You cannot mature without thinking praying and making new choices. God bless you.

Thank you for the advice,I will meditate on this scripture.

 

[Christgirl67]

Coming here was probably a good Idea if you like to talk... well text... well type... you know what I mean

lscripture.
Lol yeah

 

[Jon Osterman]

You were definitely out of line. It is not reasonable to expect someone to text back right away. He could have been busy. He could have just not felt like texting. He might just not like texting.

I don't like texting or getting texts. My wife often send me texts with these horrible emoji (love hearts and such) but I only reply if something needs to be said. (And I never use emojis!) I think most men are like this - my male friends and I only ever send short one sentence texts for organisational reasons (like meeting up).

 

[Christgirl67]

You were definitely out of line. It is not reasonable to expect someone to text back right away. He could have been busy. He could have just not felt like texting. He might just not like texting.

I don't like texting or getting texts. My wife often send me texts with these horrible emoji (love hearts and such) but I only reply if something needs to be said. (And I never use emojis!) I think most men are like this - my male friends and I only ever send short one sentence texts for organisational reasons (like meeting up).

True I was mad in the moment because I was bored and wanted someone to talk to.I apologized,but I feel really dumb now

 

[Halbhh]

True I was mad in the moment because I was bored and wanted someone to talk to.I apologized,but I feel really dumb now

We've all been there, and it seems it was only yesterday sometimes in my mind.

 

[Christgirl67]

Yeah I just know this was probably the last straw for them,so I just feel terrible

 

[Halbhh]

Yeah I just know this was probably the last straw for them,so I just feel terrible

Maybe, but from experience, I know that as you change (feel differently) from day to day, they will too, and also that most people will forgive, and here's a good thing -- a real friend will forgive you. So, you can only win on that -- if they are a good friend they will forgive, especially as you yourself come with a different attitude. It's like every day is a new day. (Of course it matters that we confess/repent, as it seems you did on this one already). Practically, you can just presume they will forgive you, as you see them next (or message them next, on a different day), you yourself having a different mood/attitude, visibly friendly/humble. But because a person begins doing the greatest commandment, we become so filled with love that we aren't even feeling it's high stakes. We are in the for long run.

 

[Christgirl67]

Thank you,that made me feel encouraged.I will just work on treating my neighbor better.

 

[Christgirl67]

Just a update ,we chose to just end the friendship.It was other factors playing into making this decision,and we both decided it would be best.

 

[Halbhh]

Well you want to forgive them, and trust the Lord, and when you love the Lord all things work for your good. Be sure to focus time to do the greatest commandment.

 

[Christgirl67]

Thank you.

 

[little_miss_sunshine]

If I were you, I would let the situation "cool" for awhile. Maybe they are going through some hardship. And then I would talk openly to them to see what is going on... It's better to know than to wonder.