Is it always worth correcting incorrect Scriptuare application?

[OnePeter315]

Morning all,

I'm not involved in youth ministry directly, but the subject of this question is a teenager I am very close with. She is practically a daughter to me. She is dealing with an issue between her and the head instructor at her karate studio. She and he are having problems regarding his interpretation of her being disrespectful (I don't think she is) and her feeling she can't freely speak her mind in areas outside of the studio. He has called a meeting with her. She wisely turned to Scripture to try and figure out how to handle it. I've offered to sit with her in the meeting because she is essentially an orphan (mom passed away, dad out of state, lives with her older adult sister). I offered to be in the meeting with her because I'm not convinced the instructor will give her a fair shake. It might just turn into a venting session on his part. She told me last night "I'm going to handle it like we are told in Matthew 18:15-18 (dealing with sin in the church).

I think her understanding of the situation in Scripture here is wrong. When I read it, it's more like if you see a peer doing something wrong. She is in a situation where she is being brought in to discuss an issue she is having with the head guy - not a peer. But, is it worth it to correct her on this? I don't want to come off the wrong way. I think she's doing the right thing, but her application here is wrong

Thanks for the advice

 

[Citizen of the Kingdom]

"She is dealing with an issue between her and the head instructor at her karate studio."

Having signed on to the course she has signed on to some sort of agreement to being subject to a teaching. That tends to come with an instructor. Maybe go over the agreement to see if he is in violation and if she has not agreed to following the rules he puts forth it may be that she can learn better from another studio and leave that behind her.

 

[Hammster]

I think it would be a good time to help her apply scripture properly. I agree that her use of that passage is incorrect unless the instructor is a member of the church.

 

[Soyeong]

Evil

Morning all,

I'm not involved in youth ministry directly, but the subject of this question is a teenager I am very close with. She is practically a daughter to me. She is dealing with an issue between her and the head instructor at her karate studio. She and he are having problems regarding his interpretation of her being disrespectful (I don't think she is) and her feeling she can't freely speak her mind in areas outside of the studio. He has called a meeting with her. She wisely turned to Scripture to try and figure out how to handle it. I've offered to sit with her in the meeting because she is essentially an orphan (mom passed away, dad out of state, lives with her older adult sister). I offered to be in the meeting with her because I'm not convinced the instructor will give her a fair shake. It might just turn into a venting session on his part. She told me last night "I'm going to handle it like we are told in Matthew 18:15-18 (dealing with sin in the church).

I think her understanding of the situation in Scripture here is wrong. When I read it, it's more like if you see a peer doing something wrong. She is in a situation where she is being brought in to discuss an issue she is having with the head guy - not a peer. But, is it worth it to correct her on this? I don't want to come off the wrong way. I think she's doing the right thing, but her application here is wrong

Thanks for the advice

Evil speech is saying anything that would lower someone's reputation in the eyes of others, even if true, unless the people need to hear it in order to act upon it. For instance, if you became aware that someone was about to enter into business with a scammer, then it would be appropriate to warn them, but if you're just bad-mouthing the scammer to people that aren't going to act on that information, then it would be evil speech. Judging disputes or court cases would be another example. So there is nothing inherently wrong with her speaking her mind, but if it is involving her speaking negatively about her karate instructor to people who do not need to know in order to act upon that information, then it is evil speech. The Bible has much to say about the power of our tongue and the importance of using it to build each other up rather than teach each other down.

In Matthew 18:15, it speaks specifically in regard to a brother or sister who sins, so it is speaking specifically in regard to those who are in the church and to those who are sinning, not to someone outside the church who is at fault for something that isn't necessarily a sin. However, if you think that someone outside the church is at fault over something, then it is nevertheless a good practice to meet privately with them to clear up the dispute, and if that's all she meant by following Matthew 18:15-18, then it's fine. If they will not listen, then you should bring one or two others along so that everything can be established by two or three witnesses, but it is important that they be impartial witness who have not already been biased toward one side of the dispute. If they still won't listen, then I think it is speaking bringing it before the church leaders, who are have the responsibility of resolving disputes, so again about handling matters within the church. Rarely is there a dispute where only one party is at fault.

 

[Tolworth John]

Who is legally responsablefor her?
What does the dojos rules say about discipline?

Unfortunetly you do not have any legal right in this as you are not related. Rase your concerns with whoever is responcible for her.
The dojo should have notified them about any disciplinary issues. Also rase the issue of child protection, a girl being interviewd by an older man without an independant chaperone, that raises warning bells.

 

[Daniel Marsh]

without knowing all the facts like what she is saying outside I can not go anywhere with this. If She is witnessing to other students, the instructor is wrong based on free speech. If She is gossiping .... If She is warning others concerning the business, She has every right to, but move on.