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Featured Is everything Gods plan? I may have messed up.

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by gtfox26, Aug 17, 2019.

  1. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

    25
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    Hi, I'm a fairly new Christian. Even though I was raised Presbyterian, I back slid most of my adult life.

    I recently took a new job because I thought it would be better for my family. I'm a truck driver so good jobs are hard to come by. I gave up a job that was really easy but was under new management and I thought I was going to be laid off or fired. I had lots of problems there in the past months and lots of other people left too. My schedule was kind of weird but I had 3 days off and made enough money to get by, although my hours were cut dramatically over the last year or so.

    I ended up taking a job that is a lot different from anything else I've ever done it's a Monday through Friday job pretty much during normal business hours. I'll work crazy hours in the winter time but that's where I'll make the money I wasn't at my old job. The rest of the year I'll make about the same as my old job give or take a little. In trucking it's very hard to get something close to business hours.

    Here's where the problem is, I have a 3 year old autistic boy. He had already been struggling because of the turmoil at my old job. I forgot to mention I was out of work the whole month of June and part of July for a minor injury, even though I was perfectly capable of doing my job. My doctor even said it was ok. Anyway, that's where my son started struggling. If anyone is familiar with autism they hate change. As I said, I thought normal hours would help his autistic symptoms but it made them worse than I ever could have imagined. I have 2 other kids. It has disrupted the whole household. He screams, cries kicks holes in walls all the time. It's unbearable. Mainly either when I get home or leave for work. It's getting to the point where if it gets much worse I may have to move out. We wouldn't be breaking up, it would just be so my other kids and fiance could have a more bearable life. I don't have anywhere to go and that's not what I want. If anyone reads this I'd appreciate a prayer.

    I apologize for the long post. My question is though, I feel as though I've made the wrong decision by taking this job. I keep telling myself it's God's plan. I don't get it though. Is it possible for me to make a move like that and maybe it wasn't his plan and I screwed up? I've already tried to get my old job back after being at my new one only a week. My old job has been filled. So much for getting laid off. If I was going to be laid off by them, they wouldn't have replaced me.
     
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  2. godhasmynumber

    godhasmynumber New Member

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    Australia
    Christian
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    NOTHING is by accident WITH God, ALL THINGS work TOGETHER for those that LOVE HIM. God SEES YOUR HEART. trust HIM even though WE MAKE MISTAKES he NEVER DOES. trust trust trust HIM and PUT IT ALL on the table TO HIM, your FAMILY your SON, pray OVER HIM and ANOINT HIM with oil BEFORE YOU LEAVE for work everyday, so that your wife and other children may endure their day with him in love.
     
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  3. As Hell Falls

    As Hell Falls New Member

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    Be in prayer, remember that we live in a fallen world and that nothing we see will be perfect but God will restore all things* to perfection. Until then, we are to continue to be molded into the shape of Christ, living God's will for us which is discovered by continually seeking God. You cannot "hang up" the phone & expect to hear His voice, while the troubles of this life are many & weary, Jesus conquered our debt & He is King over all. Keep praying, keep seeking, keep following.

    *Asterisk is to add that not all things in the literal sense of all things will be restored; rather, the earth, heaven & the bodies of the saints (possibly animals or "new" animals but that's another discussion).
     
  4. joshua 1 9

    joshua 1 9 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    United States
    Christian
    Married
    From the beginning I have been told that there is God's perfect divine will and God's permissive will. God will allow things because HE can cause good to come out of any situation. Life is not always going to be easy. We need to depend on God for strength and for His help. The way to destruction is easy, the way to life is difficult. The main thing is what the law of attraction people talk about we need to attract positive energy to ourselves. WE do not want to worry or complain or do anything that would attract negativity. Name it and claim it is a bit crude but we need to call the things that are not as though they were. God does have a plan and a purpose for us and He does work everything according to His will.
     
  5. -Sasha-

    -Sasha- Handmaid of God

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    That sounds like a really tough situation. If a change in work schedule caused such turmoil for your son, I can't imagine that you entirely leaving the home would be an improvement. It might just take time for him to adjust to the new flow of things. Have you considered getting a visual day schedule he can look at that will show what time you leave and come home? I was thinking something like this: Modern-Family-Schedule-Chore-Chart-Download.jpg
    but with the time (in hours) instead of days, and cool images showing different things throughout the day... ie 8AM: picture of dad leaving house, 9AM picture of breakfast food, noon picture of lunch food, 5PM picture of dad coming home. Something like that might help him understand what's going to be happening so it doesnt feel so chaotic.
     
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  6. lambofgod43985889

    lambofgod43985889 Active Member Supporter

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    god's plan can put you to the test, it can destroy things, but he won't give you more burden that you can carry, if you complain wrongly like "i can't with this burden", it could be bad.
     
  7. Sketcher

    Sketcher Born Imperishable

    +5,176
    Non-Denom
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    US-Republican
    Keep the job if you can't get a better one. He's 3, he can and should adjust. Quitting your job would be another disruption, plus he went through a disruption during that month when you were unemployed.
     
  8. ajcarey

    ajcarey Active Member

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    Everything that happens is certainly not God's plan. That's easy to prove from Scripture.
    Jeremiah 19:3-5: "And say, Hear ye the word of the Lord, O kings of Judah, and inhabitants of Jerusalem; Thus saith the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel; Behold, I will bring evil upon this place, the which whosoever heareth, his ears shall tingle. Because they have forsaken me, and have estranged this place, and have burned incense in it unto other gods, whom neither they nor their fathers have known, nor the kings of Judah, and have filled this place with the blood of innocents; They have built also the high places of Baal, to burn their sons with fire for burnt offerings unto Baal, which I commanded not, nor spake it, neither came it into my mind"

    But with that said to answer your question in the post title, in your case you just have a hard and complicated situation- and seeking God and doing His will definitely doesn't eliminate the possibility of being in tricky, complicated situations. I would give your son a bit more time to adjust before making a decision to move out or leave this job; and I think others here have given some good advice to help him in making the necessary adjustment.

    2 Corinthians 4:6-11: "For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us. We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;
    Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed; Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body. For we which live are always delivered unto death for Jesus' sake, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our mortal flesh."
     
  9. D.A. Wright

    D.A. Wright Stealth Defender Of Holy Writ Supporter

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    You can count on more than one from me.

    Friend, when people are really struggling like you are talk is pretty cheap, isn't it?

    I could give you lots of advice and general counsel. Obviously, we've all had troubles and learned from them. But when you're really up against it, the best kind of help is sympathy. I don't know exactly what you're going through. I have no doubt that you're sincere and giving an honest account. But I don't know exactly how you feel. I don't mean boo-hoo or warm fuzzies or anything like that. I mean that you're experience is specific to you and none of us can understand it as you do.

    Except for One Person:

    The One Who has the very hairs of your head numbered. (Luke 12:7)

    He doesn't merely know how many there are.

    He has a specific number assigned to each one of them.

    I don't want to become too dogmatic here. But I can tell you for sure (I've studied this all out) that when Christ was hanging on that cross, He was thinking of you and your family, and about how He was, even then, working out a solution for you. One day, He'll take you all up in His arms and show you what things would have been like had He not allowed you to pass over the ground you are now.

    And He doesn't expect you to fully envision that now, but He prayed for you that you would thrive in your walk with Him (John 17:20) even through your present, trying time of trouble. And His prayers do not bounce off the ceiling as we sometimes feel ours do.

    As far as being in harmony with God's plan is concerned, you really have no choice. He is constantly operating to ensure that things work out even as we are falling behind and running ahead of Him. Nothing surprises Him; He is never perplexed by our problems. And it breaks His heart to see us worry needlessly. So you may safely trust Him with your case.

    If you need some light reading material on how you can be assured of His help and interest in you, personally:

    Steps To Jesus
     
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  10. Aussie Pete

    Aussie Pete Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Hi, welcome to the "I'm not infallible" club. If we are born again, we have a new spirit where Lord Jesus dwells. I have found that all my major decisions, when made without consulting the Lord and especially under stress, have been wrong. These days I seek for peace in my heart. If I have peace, I'm more confident that I'm hearing correctly from the Lord. I also know that it is possible to talk yourself into believing something because you want it too much. Colossians 3:15 is a great help, especially in the Amplified version. I've proven it in my own life many times. Yes, it is referring to the Church generally, but it works on the individual level also
     
  11. Aussie Pete

    Aussie Pete Well-Known Member Supporter

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    Great idea. I have two autistic grandchildren. My daughter uses something very similar and it works.
     
  12. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

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    Thanks everyone for the responses. I did pray and pray before I put in my notice at my old job. I asked for a sign to show I was doing the right thing. I thought he gave me one. The day I planned on putting in my notice, a truck from the company I ended up taking the job at pulled in. I had never seen one before. It may sound dumb but it brought tears to my eyes. I thought it was my sign. I was still so hesitant to put in my notice but I did anyway. It didn't feel right though and honestly I had kind of hoped my new job wouldn't hire me to make my decision easy.
     
  13. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

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    United States
    Non-Denom
    In Relationship
    I also prayed so hard to get my old job back. I called my old manager. I don't think she liked me very much but she said she didn't have a problem with me coming back. That gave me hope. Then I texted her the next day and she said the position was filled. I'm still in touch with my old co workers and confirmed this to be true. I guess going back is not God's plan.
     
  14. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

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    My new job might not be so bad if not for the turmoil at home. I have 0 support from my fiance. She says I never should have done it. She never really spoke up though. We haven't been doing well ever since I was on disability for a month.
     
  15. A. Sinner

    A. Sinner New Member

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    Canada
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    First of all: you haven’t done anything wrong and your being confused is natural.

    As someone who knows a little (quite a bit) about autism, let me just say that your son is saying he loves and needs you. Don’t mistake his anger for anything but that. You can’t leave. In my opinion, that will make things worse but listen to your instincts (the quiet thoughts in Gods voice that come to you, not all that other noise).

    As far as your last job goes, move on. Let it go right now. There is no going back. So let go and let God. The Serenity Prayer might help you here.

    Life is messy and certain hardships can seem unbearable, but they’re not. Dump it all on God (he wants you to) and pray for peace. I recently accepted a job that has cast some doubt and confusion in my life but part of letting go and letting God is trading that anxiety for faith and letting God handle it.

    Keep praying and loving your son. You’re on the right track, brother.
     
  16. A. Sinner

    A. Sinner New Member

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    It’s important to have your spouse or soon-to-be-spouse on your side with full support. Her concerns should be expressed with love and support and nothing less. This is really important. My advice is to get into marriage counselling now with her, just make sure you find the right counsellor.
     
  17. Anhelyna

    Anhelyna Handmaid of God Supporter CF Senior Ambassador

    +11,687
    Eastern Orthodox
    Private
    gtfox26

    You have been given some very good advice here - I hope it works for you.

    I'm going to ask Staff to move this thread to Christian Advice Christian Advice as this area is meant for brief introductions. I have a feeling that Christian Advice will allow members to go into greater detail as they try and help and support you.
     
  18. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

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    Thank you. Everyone has given good advice but yours has somehow given me comfort.
     
  19. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

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    Non-Denom
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    Thank you, I would appreciate that.
     
  20. gtfox26

    gtfox26 New Member

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    Non-Denom
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    Thank you. Unfortunately we don't have time or money for marriage counseling. I've tried to hear her concerns but it just turns into her putting me down for switching jobs even though I was trying to better myself and my family.
     
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