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Is being attracted to the same ethnic-type, constantly, a sign of idolatry?

Discussion in 'Singles (Only*)' started by J Daniel, Jul 20, 2019.

  1. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Constantly being attracted to a certain group of women (believers or not) knowing full well that the grass is not necessarily greener on the other side. Thinking they are walking Gods when in reality they are just the same as everybody else.

    Sure you like what you like but is it not a sickness and pure idolatry that needs to be erased right away?

    Thinking every ethnic type of woman is some Alex Morgan when that is just a hype job from the global media we live in.

    Living as a recluse seems like such an amazing option at time - really does.

    Poisoning people's mind.
     
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  2. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla His little lady

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    This came across my mind a few years ago. I have consistently dated one ethnic group. One day, I intentionally looked around me to notice others and appreciate the differences.

    Where physical attraction becomes sinful is when we tell ourselves that one group is superior to the next. And our dating choices grow out of that perspective. That isn’t godly at all.
     
  3. Aabbie James

    Aabbie James The Word Became Flesh

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    There are two main Bible passages that speak to idolatry. There may be other scriptures that apply, but these two are foundational: Exodus 20:2-6; and Romans 1:18-25.

    Idolatry was the greatest temptation for God's people in both testaments. A look around and a look inside tells us that it still is.
     
  4. Miles

    Miles on the path

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    Almost anything taken to an extreme might be considered idolatry. I don't think it's wrong to have preferences, however, so long as we keep things in perspective. The people we find attractive (or unattractive) are no more or less human than we are.
     
  5. MehGuy

    MehGuy Free speech warrior degenerate Supporter

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    You can't help who you're attracted too. No reason to feel ashamed about it.
     
  6. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    I don't know about that. When there is a consistent pattern................problem.
     
  7. MehGuy

    MehGuy Free speech warrior degenerate Supporter

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    What is the consistent pattern?
     
  8. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Looking the other races thinking they're so great when in reality just the same. I know the problem anyway.
     
  9. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Of course they're no different - all members of the human family.
     
  10. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    True.
     
  11. MehGuy

    MehGuy Free speech warrior degenerate Supporter

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    Well some races have average physical differences. There is a reason some men who highly value neoteny features gravitate towards East Asian women for example.
     
  12. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Well - people do what they want. I just need to be balanced.
     
  13. THE W

    THE W AFRIKANB0T

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    Some people exclusively date within their race because they look down on other races.

    Others date exclusively within their race because other races look down on them.

    I'd say such a thing may have something to do with another sin other than idolatry.
     
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2019
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  14. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla His little lady

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    I think I follow what you’re getting at. The coffee might of helped. ;-)

    In your opinion, a person who’s only attracted to a specific ethnic group may be idolatrous if they’re unwilling to consider others? If that’s your position, I disagree.

    When we’re children, everyone gets picked. But to impress the same on adults is not appropriate. The absence of diversity doesn’t mean racism or idolatry. Discrimination is based on personal preferences.

    Whether we’re addressing companions, neighborhoods, food, hobbies, etc. Our selections reflect the suitability of one thing over another. It doesn’t imply the other is less or not valuable. But when we consider our wants and needs one thing stands out most.

    Perhaps the larger issue is exclusion and the absence of opportunities that’s bothersome for some.
     
  15. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Well - in my view - I think it is a sickness to promote those outside the race and not praise your own - that is a sickness.

    Now - YOU DO LIKE WHO YOU LIKE! Of course!

    I won't lie - I have (for a long time) had a thing for certain white women - but after everything I was really thinking *That is a sickness* I love all women - but to be so preoccupied with other women that is a sickness I am trying to deal with.

    Of course beauty comes in ALL COLOURS! GOD'S CHILDREN!

    But I know what I am saying! I think you do too.

    You fall for who you fall regardless of colour - but same time when I see I am going in the same pattern I have to think.

    Course the world we live in where European beauty standards are PUSHED in our faces does alter the mind.

    Just like people say we live in a world that is OPPOSED to God (I agree) and you do all you can to avoid that.

    I need to avoid that European beauty standards set too.

    Of course you love who you love! We don't chose that as such.

    But ultimately everybody must mind their own business.

    Just a person thing I am dealing with (with myself) cos that is a sickness when I am running after a certain group (outside of myself).

    TBH I think this is all fetishism.

     
  16. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Not mentioning racism - but the world we live in pushes European beauty standards that certainly influences.

    When you are surrounded by a certain thing constantly - it is almost like you are accustom to it.

    However, you like who you like - if you meet somebody and you have that SAME CHRIST SPIRIT colour is irrelevant of course!

    For me, personally, I need to be balanced.

    Cos when I look at my SHORT CV (resume) of women I have been close with they have all been of a certain type - and that is where I do think to myself - what have I been doing? (Or not doing?)

    NOT SAYING THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH INTERRACIAL MARRIAGES COURSE NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!

    All I am saying is I need to embrace my own a lil more. An it is a sickness for me to keep looking towards a certain group all the time - cos the truth is people know that society we live in where European beauty standards are seen as the Godly image (unfortunately).

    The fact that black families have GREATER chance of failing than ANY OTHER GROUP statistically (which is heartbreaking) I feel at times it is my duty to FIGHT AGAINST THAT UGLY TREND!

    People like Kanye West talking about THE BLACK FAMILY THIS AND THAT yes ok cool - but Mr West when it came down to choosing a woman you chose Kim Kardashian - with a very well known video and past.

    If that was a black woman that had HER past he would be rapping about her in derogatory ways (like most black rappers do towards black women).

    It is a sickness all over!

    Anyway - like I said people love who they love!

    In future I may very well be married to a white woman! Who knows!? God knows!

    All I know she needs to be Godly!

    But just what I think! :)
     
  17. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla His little lady

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    I accept that argument for impressionable minds. But adults have a choice to permit the influence or pursue a different course. There’s a lot of things the world advocates. But I don’t go down the rabbit hole unless I’m interested. There must be something within me that the message appeals to. Otherwise, I ignore it.

    If you feel personally convicted on the subject and believe you should need to diversify your tastes that’s understandable.

    This can be a challenging issue for some people of color and finger-pointing happens on both sides. My stance is simple. It’s none of my business. And I’d never make it my business. But the same holds true for my affairs.

    I was reared in an environment where ladyship and etiquette were mainstays. I was expected to be poised and never forsake my station. Rap would violate all of that and then some. I have no interest in it.

    Men of color receive more flack for interracial marriages than women do. I’ve never had anyone question my preferences or look askance because my partner was Caucasian. I like what I like. As do most. :)
     
  18. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Again - if you have the right spirit with that person - colour means nothing - my previous was white - I thought at times we would hit it off - but didn't - but it is about what type of people your surround yourself with in your personal time so not influenced - hence why I LOVED the men's meeting at my church - all the men looking just like me that are God fearing and meaning business! VERY UPLIFTING!
    That is my stance too - didn't care when Serena Williams married that white man (though he is suspect with his Reddit side that ridicules his wife like no man's business) but anyway I was like HER CHOICE that is it! She is not stupid she knows what she is an where she comes from - the story of Mr Williams raising them facing pure racism - she married a person she felt comfortable with - not my business.
    Defo - cos truth is a lot of people of other races (don't care if they are Christian) believe in staying with their own for the most part. Won't admit it in public - but in private - it is an elephant in the room. So chasing a certain group of women that come from that (NOT ALL) but enough - that come from such a view point - THAT IS A SICKNESS. I have no business chasing that.
    Yes you have white woman that are just about black men - but I have my reasons why they are like that (but won't say that here cos I will get removed from the forum).
    Yeah - just the hypocrisy of that - I don't like it. No pass given to black women (that did and still does the same his WOMAN OF COLOUR wife in Kardashian does) but his alleged photogenic wife (with purchased body part to mimic a black woman) is treated as God on earth. To me Kanye seems like the type of guy that didn't get vagina when he was younger and was not allowed to leave his stoop on the streets of Chicago.
    Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm depends who and what circles you listen into - I know many people black men that slate other black men for marrying outside their race.
    But - what appeals to me atm (with white women) might not be the case if I live to 40.
    Cos when you are young - fetish mind - from films etc etc etc.
    One of my previous partners (the Islamic Turkish woman) I saw her a few years back.
    And she looked old................................ (O.O) just i dunno older.............(she is 2 years younger than I am) but looked older =/.
    Funny cos I remember my mother told me she watched an interview with one of the Wayans Brothers (the one that played SHORTY in the Scary Movie film) he was on a programme called THE VIEW and people were like WOW YOU LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME AS YOU DID 20 YEARS AGO! And he made a comment saying ****BLACK DON'T CRACK - UNLESS YOU SMOKE IT**** HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA

    And fact is black women age wonderfully - and when I think of LONGEVITY (not the here and now of a fetish woman) but LONGEVITY (I dunno if I told you but I went to midweek service with my mother last week and the Bishop fort she was my wife HAHA - i was like NO THAT IS MY MOTHER!!!!!!!!!!! Church was all shocked cos she looks super young) but anyway LONGEVITY of your partner! In all areas - spiritually but also attraction - cos if you are with your woman for a long time - when she hits 50 and still looks 29!! But a woman you are with now cos it gets the blood racing but when she hits 50 she looks 65.............................. or so............................hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.................Look for me - I just need to be VERY SENSIBLE when I SETTLE DOWN in future ON ALL LEVELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    BTW - that woman I told you about I was interested in church - I saw her - but never said anything to her - I realised I am far better than her and she can't do anything for me and will be a derailment in what I am trying to achieve right now.

    In church I sat at the front so I wouldn't be distracted by her - I was about the word.

    In future when I am where I am in life - I will ask my bishop about her and do it in the right way - not talking to women in my church like that - might as well go to a night club if I am gonna go church to chat to women like that.

    I am far better than her and that.

    I am young I have serious fields left to plough!
     
  19. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla His little lady

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    I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.

    The absence of public acknowledge is a question of propriety. Information is disclosed as needed. Confidences are earned. Not freely bestowed.

    Inclusiveness is commonplace in some circles. You can find it in wealth, business, cultures, location/region, philanthropy, hobbies, and religion too. Including Christianity.

    People congregate over similarities. I look for common denominators in background, values, lifestyle, faith, work and mindset. While everything isn’t identical. There’s enough agreement to find common ground.

    I like people I can share my life with. They fit in my world and I in theirs. I’m beyond the extremes and unicorns. That was fine in my youth. But I prefer different company now.

    Aging is directly impacted by genes, diet, quality of food, health, fitness, stress, lifestyle, and skincare maintenance. Everyone ages at some point.

    I believe its important to exercise modesty in ones appearance and estimation of your attractiveness. The more that you’ve received from God; the tighter your lips should close.

    My friendly is exceedingly handsome. But he’s never referenced it in all the years I’ve known him. He doesn’t address his physique or intellect. He was made for a runway. But its never come up. I respected that immensely. Because most would toot their horn without.

    For me, watching my Beloved age is priceless. I don’t mind the changes. It’s a testament of the years we’ve spent hand-in-hand. I want someone beautiful inside and out. Not just a pretty face.
     
  20. J Daniel

    J Daniel Active Member

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    Cos ya grew up!
    Yes - and normally this stress is from the opposite sex stress.
    Yep, some far more earlier than others!
    That should be a case of your PRAISING HIM for those gifts you have received.
    Could be as well cos was complemented on many occasions about it too.
    Sign of long term commitment. But there is a reason why people promote the greatness of still looking young regardless and if you are blessed to still look young PRAISE GOD! #Amen
     
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