inappropriate comment from pastor to church

[ke1985]

I visited my hometown last weekend for Thanksgiving and my pastor said something a little inappropriate and awkward. He was giving an analogy about strength and when he works out, he "hopes for some heavy making out" with his wife. It's one thing to say this to a buddy, it's another to say it in front of the whole church! :o

My sister said this is not the first time he has said something like this.

What do you think? Should I say something?

 

[Sketcher]

If you're a regular attender, you could take him aside between the two of you and address your concern.

 

[ke1985]

I am not. I only visit my hometown every 3 months or so. Is this something one should just let slide? I dont think anyone has said anything...

 

[znr]

I am not. I only visit my hometown every 3 months or so. Is this something one should just let slide? I dont think anyone has said anything...

If I wasn't attending the church/wasn't a regular member, it might be-speaking of-inappropriate to bring it up at all.

 

[Sketcher]

I am not. I only visit my hometown every 3 months or so. Is this something one should just let slide? I dont think anyone has said anything...

Well, in that case, you're an outsider rather than somebody who is either regularly attending or potentially a regular attender. In which case, it is less likely that he would listen to you.

 

[Johnnz]

What is really so wrong about his comments? He is married and will be sexual with his wife. Obviously he enjoys that part of their relationship. I think my response would be "Yeah, a pastor who enjoys sex with his wife!"

John
NZ

 

[heron]

There will always be different responses within the congregation -- some will feel like this makes him a regular guy, and some will feel like he's intruding on personal ground, while others will just say it's inappropriate.

I know people who have been through abuse, who were extremely uncomfortable with sexual innuendos coming from the pulpit. If just out of protection for them, it could be worth mentioning. I wonder if it made his wife uncomfortable. I would have been if I were her.

 

[znr]

What is really so wrong about his comments? He is married and will be sexual with his wife. Obviously he enjoys that part of their relationship. I think my response would be "Yeah, a pastor who enjoys sex with his wife!"

John
NZ

God forbid.

 

[+RubiesFire+]

I believe God's house was disrespected, it's supposed to be about God, not the Pastor's make out session.

 

[GaryP]

That is why, Pastors should think before speaking. He made a pass at comedy and failed.
The joke bombed with you. He also disrespected his wife in public.
The key words are, he offended you.
I would forget about it, and make a decision if you should return.

 

[alan650]

I think that pastor was just trying to make a joke and probably said it in the heat of the moment. We have all said things at one time or another that may be inappropriate to someone else. I would let it slide.

 

[daniel82]

I visited my hometown last weekend for Thanksgiving and my pastor said something a little inappropriate and awkward. He was giving an analogy about strength and when he works out, he "hopes for some heavy making out" with his wife. It's one thing to say this to a buddy, it's another to say it in front of the whole church! :o

My sister said this is not the first time he has said something like this.

What do you think? Should I say something?

no to be well really what was so bad about what he said. what are you gonna do when he jumps on the topic us un married sex being a sin and about people shackin up its not like he was vulger or out of line your a church your a family yall gotta be able to talk to each other if anyone got offended let me say this if anyone should say something it should be his wife but if she has no problem why should you

 

[Forealzchola]

I would of felt a lil akward or rolled my eyes on that comment too...but some people feel its okay for the pastor to say things like that since hes married..."they call i being real or whatever"

 

[fat_boy]

What do you think? Should I say something?

I honestly dont think you should. Its a joke, admittedly, a bad one, but its just a joke. Some will have found it useful, some not so useful, some offencive, but this will apply to many parts of the sermon. The pastor will be stuck with a deluge of feedback and, obviously, he can't please everyone. The fact you're even asking instead of having already told him how you feel shows it probably isnt that big a deal.

 

[Life2Christ]

This reminds me of a Youtube video I saw where Joel Osteen was talking about Victoria Secret lingerie in one of his sermons. I wish I could find the video but somebody posted it to show that it was inappropriate. In my opinion, I find that those who are prudish about sex oftentimes make the most inappropriate comments at the wrong time. During a sermon you have to be careful about making such comments because there are children in the audience and people who are suffering from all kinds of issues.

 

[ezeric]

Isnt Joel Osteen's wife - Victoria?

Is that a secret?

That from a sermon could be taken the wrong way or some different path.

I think, we are to judge what people say in church. 1 Corinthians 14:29
I also think, legalism has some saints thinking they are too good, or
they don't do this or that.

Some sins go before a man, others come from behind. 1 Timothy 5:24

Some of us look good, but we are wicked in places you can't see.
Others may look outwardly bad, but maybe have a purer heart.

-eric

 

[Life2Christ]

Isnt Joel Osteen's wife - Victoria?

Is that a secret?

Yes he mentioned that is his wife's name but he did not refer to her in the example.

 

[heron]

During a sermon you have to be careful about making such comments because there are children in the audience and people who are suffering from all kinds of issues.

I have heard scattered discussion on this topic among pastors/teachers, and I think pastors are learning it from each other -- as though it is approved because a few tried it and it turned out okay. But that is not how we form our ministries, by public opinion.

Even though every sentence does not need to include the word Jesus, the aim is to direct our minds toward God. Any pastor knows that many people in the congregation struggle with inappropriate contentography issues, so they should know there is no benefit in encouraging a distraction like that.

The mind makes an abrupt shift, and some people are better than others at bringing the mind back into the sermon topic. Some people might be lost for the rest of the sermon.

 

[ezeric]

Yes he mentioned that is his wife's name but he did not refer to her in the example.

Yes, that makes sense.

My thought, was simply it was easy to take that quote, and go another
way with it.

What some might think inappropriate or offensive for Joel to say,
I took as funny.

My further thought was this...

We know JESUS is LOVE (GOD IS LOVE), and that JESUS never sinned,
not even once. So that everything JESUS said and did was LOVING
and not even a hint of selfish sin. Right?

Because some of the things HE (JESUS) said/did, offended them.
see Matthew 15:12 & John 6:61

I think we have to learn exactly what LOVE is like (not what we think
it is) and how LOVE acts and talks - sometimes it may offend, sometimes
it may seem inappropriate!

We know that it only has the HIGHEST GOOD as its goal!!!

Just sharing here...

-eric

 

[kellyc]

pastors are human too. i don't think the comment was appropriate, but his wife is the one who should lay the smackdown. just ignore it, some people are not socially skilled but nevertheless good hearted.