in a bit of a pickle

meredithgood

Newbie
Jun 17, 2013
19
6
Melbourne
✟7,669.00
Faith
Anglican
Marital Status
Single
Hello all!

So ive only recently been embracing my Christian faith again, and finally plucked up the courage to tell my long term boyfriend (of 3 years), about my beliefs, hes not a christian but is really supportive and fine with it, he even offered to go to church with me one sunday to show he supports me. The church ive started going to is great, everyones amazing, there is this one lady, who is being my sort of mentor to get back into my faith and be re-united with God, she is SET on me converting my boyfriend, and honestly i think the fact i have a loving boyfriend who respects and supports my beliefs makes me blessed indeed! Its getting to the point where the lady always asks me at the start and end and sometimes during church about him and ways i can get through to him, dont get me wrong i would love my boyfriend to know God but its just getting frustrating, so much so that im feeling uncomfortable and want to change churches.

I dont really know what the point of this thread was, just to let it out lol
Thanks so much for hearing me out guys!
 

NiobiumTragedy

Glorious Tragedy
Jun 15, 2009
2,021
63
USA
✟17,652.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Others
I would council with your pastor on how to best handle the situation with the woman. It's not her place to convert him. In fact, it's not anyones place to convert him. It's a decision he needs to make himself if he ever chooses to or not. However, what the woman is doing is harmful and I would address the situation asap before it begins to spiral.

On the issue of your bf, I think it's a non-issue. He's supportive of your decision and that's fantastic. Don't let people try to guilt you with this "unequally yolked" talk.
 
Upvote 0

jennabug423

Christian Intellectual
Jul 5, 2013
16
0
33
Michigan
✟7,626.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
In Relationship
Politics
US-Libertarian
I think her intentions are good, but can you politely tell her to back off? Say something like, 'His faith is his decision, and right now I'm focusing on me. He's more than welcome to join me when he's ready.'

As for converting him? You can't make him do anything, but you can be a positive influence towards him. Eventually, I think you will have to decide whether or not the relationship is going to benefit or hinder your spiritual relationship with God. The closer you get to God, you might find yourself being farther away from your boyfriend spiritually and emotionally. You also might set some physical boundaries that weren't in your relationship before with which he could disagree.

Also note: the idea of being 'unequally yoked' is not one to be taken lightly. God wants our marriages to be with someone who will help us with our spiritual relationship. A man should be a leader in Christ for his wife and children. As you become more mature in your faith, you will probably desire that.

Now, I am in NO WAY advocating you leave your boyfriend. I think you should stay and be an example in his life; however, if you outgrow him spiritually, do not be afraid to seek a mate who is Christ focused.
 
Upvote 0

NiobiumTragedy

Glorious Tragedy
Jun 15, 2009
2,021
63
USA
✟17,652.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Others
He wasn't trying to guilt her. He said it can cause problems. It can.
That wasn't directed at just him.
None the less, I know plenty of people who married "unequally yolked" and have stronger relationships than the majority of the Christian relationships I've seen. *shrugs*
 
Upvote 0

4christ88

Angel in training
Jan 10, 2004
3,573
175
Queens, NYC, US
✟19,612.00
Faith
Protestant
Marital Status
Single
Well none of us are Christian-converting machines. THat is purely the job of the Holy Spirit...he is the one that can convict people about who God is and Christ's death and gift of salvation and the need to accept that and become a new glorious creation.

I think that you should at least pray for your boyfriend and ask God for wisdom in how to be Christ example to him in the way you live. Usually when we come back to Christ and are genuine and devoted to following him wholeheartedly, your bf will start to see changes in you..that alone can be a very effective testimony...more than badgering him to get converted and receive Christ. sure, when he asks, you can share with him...or if you're like me...my love for Christ automatically slips mention of Christ or some aspect of my relationship with him into almost all conversations I have with those around me.

As Jennabug423 mentioned, i think when you grow more in Christ and develop more knowledge and understanding of who he is through your talks with Jesus and reading his Word, he alone will convict you in the decision concerning your bf. Like for myself, even though the guy I was seeing is a Christian, for some months I've been uneasy...and this question keeps coming to my mind: can i see him as the spiritual head of my future family? answer was a heartbreaking N-O. I tried and I tried, I tried to get him interested in studying scriptures or going through a bible study...and then his convictions concerning physical intimacy was basically nonexistent and so also considering other issues and our different strength of convictions, finally I'm convinced that I should end it....because what's the point of dating for dating sake if it's not going anywhere right? And I am not content with just being a laid back Sunday-Sunday Christian. Therefore, I think the unequally-yoked bible verse/people's arguments can refer to many different things. hopefully one day you, and others in similar situation reading this will understand what I'm talking about

My relationship with Christ affects everything of who I am: what I believe, the way I treat people, how I go about different issues and so many other unconscious areas of my life so it will be so obvious when I can't relate anymore to somewhere who doesn't share some deep-seated beliefs with me :)

Your bf might tell you he respects and supports your belief. But let me leave a thought/question with you: Can two walk together except they agree?
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0