If your spouse divorced you, is it a sin to remarry?

Blessed&Forgiven

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Just one quick confusing question for me...if anyone can help. If your spouse divorced you (not for infidelity reasons n he's a non-believer), can you remarry someone else from church in the church? Or should we stay single or reconcile with the spouse? Is it actually still a sin to get remarry even though it wasn't your idea to get the divorce (the spouse left)? If we marry someone else (a believer), will this be a sin as Jesus said that "to marry a divorced woman" is to commit sin. I'm so confused, does this mean that even though we're the victim here, our options are only stay single or reconcile with previous spouse? Can anyone suggest something?
 

Evie

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Blessed&Forgiven said:
Just one quick confusing question for me...if anyone can help. If your spouse divorced you (not for infidelity reasons n he's a non-believer), can you remarry someone else from church in the church? Or should we stay single or reconcile with the spouse? Is it actually still a sin to get remarry even though it wasn't your idea to get the divorce (the spouse left)? If we marry someone else (a believer), will this be a sin as Jesus said that "to marry a divorced woman" is to commit sin. I'm so confused, does this mean that even though we're the victim here, our options are only stay single or reconcile with previous spouse? Can anyone suggest something?
hmm,I have been marriage twice only beacause my first was so physcially abusive,so I remarried (years later anyways).We are both Christians and know that Christ has forgiven us. Not sure what to tell you accept,pray about it.
 
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gracefaith

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When Jesus spoke of it being a sin to marry a divorced woman, I think he was speaking specifically to marrying someone who has left their spouse to get married to you. In other words, just because it was made legal in the eyes of the law doesn't make it any less an act of adultery at heart. This is not what you would be doing.

Personally, I think that someone who has been divorced against their will can marry again in the church with all the blessings of God and other Christians. If someone doesn't want to be with you and didn't value your marriage vows, YOU have been sinned against - you have not sinned yourself. There is nothing you can do to make this person reconcile with you if they don't want to.

Furthermore, the Bible says we are not be unequally yoked and perhaps it is a form of blessing that you have been released from you previous poor choice? You are free now to marry someone who loves the Lord as much as you do. I say thank God for His forgiveness and mercy and dedicate your next marriage and the rest of your life to Him.
 
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FaithAlone

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God never wanted divorce but he granted it in the case of infidelity. I have never been in that position and God is who you need to ask but I would make up your own mind and not listen to opinions but go to the scriptures. 1 Corinthians 7 talks a lot about divorce and separation. You need to be convinced in your own mind after praying and searching the scriptures about it.
 
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Yitzchak

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My opinion is that God does not make rules or give commands to punish the innocent. You are free to remarry if you have done all in your power to stay marryed and reconcile if possible. But once the divorce is final, you are free to move on.

God knows the heart and whether you did all in your power to save your marriage. You cannot help the choices of your ex. Your responsibility is to do your part. There is where the stay single and try to reconcile part always comes up. It is just different people's opinions on how far your responsibility goes when it comes to doing your part to save the marriage. I think once the divorce is final, your responsibility ends. Before that, your focus should be on praying and being available to reconcile.
 
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redwing030

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I've got a question about this. Now once you ask for God's forgiveness he seperates your sins from you, forgets about them as if they never occured. So if you were to ask for His forgiveness for your being involved in a divorce (even though it wasn't your fault) wouldn't He forget about that sin? And if He does, then when you re-marry wouldn't that be in His eyes like your first marriage because He "forgot" about the divorce??? Maybe I'm just making this much more involved than it is, but I'm kind of curious. :confused:
 
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searle29678

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redwing030 said:
I've got a question about this. Now once you ask for God's forgiveness he seperates your sins from you, forgets about them as if they never occured. So if you were to ask for his forgiveness for your being involved in a divorce (even though it wasn't your fault) wouldn't he forget about that sin? And if he does, then when you re-marry wouldn't that be in his eyes like your first marriage because he "forgot" about the divorce??? Maybe I'm just making this much more involved than it is, but I'm kind of curious. :confused:

Interesting point....I know you probably shouldn't divorce simply because you don't like the person and can ask forgiveness, but that is a good question.
 
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Katydid

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My husband, before we got married, had gotten a divorce. I was concerned for the same reasons you are. When I spoke to a very good friend who also was a pastor, he looked at me and asked me a couple questions. First, he asked if I had burned and did I give in, I admitted that I had. So he then told me that I was already living in sin, and that NO sin is unforgivable, even adultery. The only unforgivable sin is blaspheming the Holy Spirit. I had to pray and honestly ask for forgiveness for having slept with my (then)fiance. And during that time it became clear that I could continue to live in that sin, or trust God's forgiveness and marry my (now) husband.
 
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heartnsoul

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Yitzchak said:
My opinion is that God does not make rules or give commands to punish the innocent. You are free to remarry if you have done all in your power to stay marryed and reconcile if possible. But once the divorce is final, you are free to move on.

God knows the heart and whether you did all in your power to save your marriage. You cannot help the choices of your ex. Your responsibility is to do your part. There is where the stay single and try to reconcile part always comes up. It is just different people's opinions on how far your responsibility goes when it comes to doing your part to save the marriage. I think once the divorce is final, your responsibility ends. Before that, your focus should be on praying and being available to reconcile.
Amen! Awesome post!:thumbsup: I agree with Yitzchak. I, myself, have been remarried and God has blessed me tremendously. From my own personal experiences of God, God is a loving and forgiving God. In some clear-cut instances, there are valid reasons for divorce like physical abuse where one's life is in danger or adultery. In other "gray" instances, sometimes people are just plain spiritually immature and decide to divorce. Are all divorced people condemned forever and live a life of hell with red monsters haunting them until they die? I don't think so. Life happens sometimes and depending on the situation and whether true repentance happens, it's up to God to forgive us or not. God knows our hearts. So, I also say that you are free to move on with your life.
 
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Gwenyfur

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Paul addressed this very question in 1 Corinthians 7:15

"15But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace."

If your ex was an unbeliever, then you are free to remarry...You are not under bondage, meaning this rule doesn't apply since we aren't to be unequally yoked.

1 Corinthians 7:16
"16For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?"

To answer your question, yes you are free to remarry, within the body, a believer, knowing the consquence and weight of the covenant you both are making with God.

I hope this helps.
 
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Svt4Him

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Blessed&Forgiven said:
Just one quick confusing question for me...if anyone can help. If your spouse divorced you (not for infidelity reasons n he's a non-believer), can you remarry someone else from church in the church? Or should we stay single or reconcile with the spouse? Is it actually still a sin to get remarry even though it wasn't your idea to get the divorce (the spouse left)? If we marry someone else (a believer), will this be a sin as Jesus said that "to marry a divorced woman" is to commit sin. I'm so confused, does this mean that even though we're the victim here, our options are only stay single or reconcile with previous spouse? Can anyone suggest something?

You can remarry.
 
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Blessed&Forgiven

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Dear Evie, Gracefaith, Faithalone, Yitzchak, Redwing030, Searle29678, Katydid, Heartnsoul, Gwenyfur and Svt4Him,

Thanks so much for all your advice n views, bros n sistas, it's just quite a relief to know what my options are. I really don't wanna sin n even though it's sad that my Hubby decided to divorce me, it's good in one way that now I can find someone that loves God n loves me to be my husband... I've learned from my unequally-yoke married A LOT n I won't make the same mistake again...thanks a lot everyone, honestly I was so confused before n was really worried to make the decision. Even though I'm staying single for now (until the wound heals) but at least I know that if I ever get remarried again with a God-fearing man, it's won't be a sin.
 
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