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If i prayed and Asked Jesus for wife...?

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by Canada90, Aug 16, 2019.

  1. Canada90

    Canada90 New Member

    42
    +25
    Lithuania
    Christian
    Single
    If i prayed and asked for a Godly wife and i believe there is somewhere my wife . Do i need to look for it or just wait for her to appear in my life?
     
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  2. Hazelelponi

    Hazelelponi Well-Known Member Supporter

    +2,593
    United States
    Baptist
    Married
    Generally speaking, the right person comes along when your not even looking for them.

    however, that doesn't mean you shouldn't put yourself out there, or look for a wife if your ready, just do so appropriately...

    Tell your Pastor or your elders at your church and they can help advise you, you can look and see if there aren't some single ladies at your church that you may be compatible with. See if there are some events for single Christians in your area etc.

    Doesn't hurt anything..
     
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  3. tampasteve

    tampasteve Lutheran Staff Member Purple Team - Moderator Supporter

    +2,189
    United States
    Lutheran
    Married
    US-Constitution
    I believe it is better to ask God's wisdom be on your life. God is not a genie waiting to answer our requests. That said, I have found that often our best friends appear when we are not "looking" but we are going about our lives, trying to live in a Godly manner, and we meet people that are like minded. Perhaps it will be the same for you. Alternatively, I met my wife online, if I had not taken the initiative to use the phone app we might not have met. Perhaps God put the phone and the app in my life so that we could meet - but it required my action.
     
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  4. Bobber

    Bobber Well-Known Member

    +510
    Non-Denom
    I'm not opposed to one as say they looking for a wife but just make sure you don't just say a quick prayer and don't offer up continual thanksgiving that God is moving in this area of your life. Appreciate there could be a timing thing as well....that God knows when the best time is to bring you together.

    If you try to force the timing of things insisting it has to be NOW, NOW, NOW....you might deceive yourself into thinking this person or that has to be the one God has provided. God may want to first work out a few things in the life of the one he actually would have you marry before bringing you together so don't be in a super rush when it comes to these things.

    When I was a younger man and single some of my Christian friends would as they say go out looking.....so they'd go to all the local churches and see who's available. They'd come back discouraged and say there just isn't anybody! I'd tell them I don't care if there isn't. That's not my problem.

    I'd tell them if God has to go to another city or another region and somehow bring us together that's what he'll do, and ironically that's what God did. I actually didn't go out looking but starting going to a Bible study that a friend of mine was having in his house out in the country. Well she came to this Bible study and was a resident of a city a number of miles the other direction. We've been married now close to 40 years.

    Funny thing too. She told me after we were married that many years before when she was just a little girl their school had a bus trip to my small town to a zoo. When she got off the bus she looked around and said to her friends, "I don't know but something tells me I'm going to marry someone from this town." She was about 9 years old at the time. Well she ended up doing that very thing.
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2019
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  5. THE W

    THE W AFRIKANB0T

    +2,328
    United States
    Presbyterian
    Single
    If you want a friend, be a friend.

    If you want a wife, be a husband.
     
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  6. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla His little lady

    +2,825
    United States
    Non-Denom
    Single
    While I think it’s wise to pray for a companion and discern the Lord’s will for you. I don’t believe you should assume the person will appear soon or without any effort on your part.

    That may involve joining an online community and creating a profile, serving with Christian organizations, and activities outside of home. Church is one avenue but it depends if yours has a sizable singles community.

    Oftentimes when people say they weren’t looking that isn’t wholly true. In most circumstances the desire for a companion didn’t consume their thoughts to the point they were unable to focus on other things and enjoy their lives. They kept living while looking.

    You should take into consideration your location. Does it have a vibrant Christian presence? Be mindful of the current condition of the church and millennial flight. The disparity is felt in more locations than others.

    Be aware that many popular authors of Christian dating books attended colleges filled with persons of the same faith. It is statistically easier to find a partner in that environment. Sometimes their advice suggests an ease that doesn’t correctly account for situations unlike their own.
     
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2019
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  7. Mountainmanbob

    Mountainmanbob Goat Whisperer Supporter

    +7,185
    United States
    Calvinist
    Married
    US-Republican
    I prayed that a long time.
    Please don't let me do the picking.
    God please send.
    I still had to take steps forward.

    Living in the country on an old dirt road
    where no one hardly ever comes to the door
    probably had to get off the couch
    and go down to town to find one.

    The main thing --
    Warning -- do not be unequally yoked.

    M-Bob
     
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  8. tturt

    tturt Senior Veteran

    +2,674
    Non-Denom
    Married
    Might want to use this waiting time in preparation such as studying/improving knowledge concerning Bibical marital guidelines, finances, communication skills, home maintenance, etc.
     
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  9. AWorkInProgress

    AWorkInProgress A fool becoming wise

    +165
    United States
    Christian
    Married
    US-Others
    Pray that the Lord give you discernment as you date potentials. Sometimes it takes a few bad relationships to realize gold when it is sitting right in front of you.

    Also if you are serious about looking for a wife. I recommend studying the Word of God to know what is expected of you as a husband. Sometimes it is very sobering when you do, lets you know of areas you need to work on before they expose themselves later on.

    For example Ephesians 5:28 says to love your wife as you love yourself (I was using NLT back then :p ) I had a big problem with that. I didn't love myself, realistically I despised myself. Once I realized that, the question arose "how can I love my wife, if I don't love myself?". The Lord worked on me with that problem.

    My wife saw gold in me long before I knew it was there. I saw gold in her when I realized that she was humble. We both been thru some painful relationships before we met. If we met years before, our relationship would have never have worked.

    I pray this helps you.
     
  10. pdudgeon

    pdudgeon Traditional Catholic

    +9,291
    United States
    Catholic
    Widowed
    US-Republican
    Actually you need to do both! Let me explain that...

    Yes you need to pray because you also need to ask God to prepare you to take good care of her, and you need to learn how to cherish the wife that He sends to you as the precious gift that she is.

    There are more than a few men out there who only look out for their own benefit, and never stop to think about what qualities or traits that they can bring to the marriage which will attract and be a benefit to their future wife.
    If you trust in God, then you will have to look as closely at yourself as you do at her, and also learn what she needs in your marriage.

    And remember to be grateful to God for the wife that He sends to you.

    Secondly you'll also have to learn how to be patient and willing to wait. Sorry about that, but Godly women are not "just around the corner waiting to be seen". They are actually "few and far between", as the saying goes.

    And lastly, be aware that a Godly woman will expect to be married to you for a lifetime, so even though she too might be looking, she might also be cautious of hasty commitments. That's where your patience pays off.

    When you have found her, make sure that you establish a good solid foundation for your relationship together before you take things too far.
    In other words, hold off on that first meeting until you both have something to talk about, and things that you naturally want to share with each other as best friends.
    If you start as friends and have a good solid foundation with each other, you stand a much better chance of making your marriage work.

    Best wishes.
     
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