Hey all,
I've never actually been diagnosed with OCD, but I do feel like I have it at some level. Anyway, one of the things I tend to fixate on is my writing, and where my ideas come from. I've been paranoid that my ideas aren't from me, but from a demon, and for a while this stopped me from writing almost completely. But then I realized, how on earth could I know that for sure? Plus, any regular person wouldn't be obsessing over this. So I got over it, for the most part, and write a novel.
I say, for the most part. One of my fears is that I'm going to say something out loud, like "d*mons, give me ideas," and that any ideas I have right after that aren't mine. Well, one of the times I obsess over saying something is when I'm running, because I tend to get deep in thought, and fear that I'm actually whispering out loud as I'm thinking (because you have to breathe with your mouth open, so I can't just keep my mouth shut and be safe from not saying anything).
I've had writer's block over a part of amother story I'm writing. I was running a while back, and I had my usual intrusive thoughts of "I'm gonna say something to demons, I can't do that, don't do that." And... I did it. Sort of. It might have sounded like gibberish, due to me running, but I think because I was thinking the thoughts so hard that I just said it. And then right after I got an idea, a solution to the writer's block.
But I'm kind of freaking out, because what if that idea wasn't from me?
I've never actually been diagnosed with OCD, but I do feel like I have it at some level. Anyway, one of the things I tend to fixate on is my writing, and where my ideas come from. I've been paranoid that my ideas aren't from me, but from a demon, and for a while this stopped me from writing almost completely. But then I realized, how on earth could I know that for sure? Plus, any regular person wouldn't be obsessing over this. So I got over it, for the most part, and write a novel.
I say, for the most part. One of my fears is that I'm going to say something out loud, like "d*mons, give me ideas," and that any ideas I have right after that aren't mine. Well, one of the times I obsess over saying something is when I'm running, because I tend to get deep in thought, and fear that I'm actually whispering out loud as I'm thinking (because you have to breathe with your mouth open, so I can't just keep my mouth shut and be safe from not saying anything).
I've had writer's block over a part of amother story I'm writing. I was running a while back, and I had my usual intrusive thoughts of "I'm gonna say something to demons, I can't do that, don't do that." And... I did it. Sort of. It might have sounded like gibberish, due to me running, but I think because I was thinking the thoughts so hard that I just said it. And then right after I got an idea, a solution to the writer's block.
But I'm kind of freaking out, because what if that idea wasn't from me?