I want this pain to stop

[dabro]

In 08 I decided I needed a shrink for my voices.

I was doing just fine. I go in and get out on Risperdal. The voices started to go away but I had this huge anxiety from my OCD.

I get put in gabapentin and nothing was working.

I go to the psych ward and a person was taking klonopin.

I asked him to throw one over the wall. I found them and my anxiety melted away.

I see it as God’s test that I failed.


In 2010 I found a doc willing to prescribe it.

I slowly started to backslide.


In 2015 Dr. Holloway passed away. In 2017 I was yanked off three my. My chastisement.

Here I am today, abusing gabapentin because of my excruciating amount of anxiety. I blame no one but myself.


I ask how can God forgive a wretch like me and how can I overcome this addictions.


Father please help me, don’t just answer a prayer but help me more then a conqueror.


Folks I’m a bad Christian, so unworthy. Please help.

 

[redleghunter]

In 08 I decided I needed a shrink for my voices.

I was doing just fine. I go in and get out on Risperdal. The voices started to go away but I had this huge anxiety from my OCD.

I get put in gabapentin and nothing was working.

I go to the psych ward and a person was taking klonopin.

I asked him to throw one over the wall. I found them and my anxiety melted away.

I see it as God’s test that I failed.


In 2010 I found a doc willing to prescribe it.

I slowly started to backslide.


In 2015 Dr. Holloway passed away. In 2017 I was yanked off three my. My chastisement.

Here I am today, abusing gabapentin because of my excruciating amount of anxiety. I blame no one but myself.


I ask how can God forgive a wretch like me and how can I overcome this addictions.


Father please help me, don’t just answer a prayer but help me more then a conqueror.


Folks I’m a bad Christian, so unworthy. Please help.

Praying for you Bro. Have you recently discussed your medication with your doctor?

Also, have you discussed your needs with a pastor or ministry recovery team?

If you PM me your general location I can help find you loving Christians to team up with as you struggle through your challenges.

God bless you!

 

[Danielwright2311]

In 08 I decided I needed a shrink for my voices.

I was doing just fine. I go in and get out on Risperdal. The voices started to go away but I had this huge anxiety from my OCD.

I get put in gabapentin and nothing was working.

I go to the psych ward and a person was taking klonopin.

I asked him to throw one over the wall. I found them and my anxiety melted away.

I see it as God’s test that I failed.


In 2010 I found a doc willing to prescribe it.

I slowly started to backslide.


In 2015 Dr. Holloway passed away. In 2017 I was yanked off three my. My chastisement.

Here I am today, abusing gabapentin because of my excruciating amount of anxiety. I blame no one but myself.


I ask how can God forgive a wretch like me and how can I overcome this addictions.


Father please help me, don’t just answer a prayer but help me more then a conqueror.


Folks I’m a bad Christian, so unworthy. Please help.

I have learned even if I do something good, I am still bad, even if I gave some one something, I did not do it on my good will, or even if I did there is a small chance I did not.

Mabey I did it for my own feelings.

My point?

We all are trash compared to God almighty.

This is why we call him almighty.

There is nothing we can do to be saved but allow God to save us him self.

On that note, I'm not saying to stop giving, no, what I am saying is at least you gave, or I did, and this is what matters, not my own feelings or sin.

If you are abusing meds, you are no diffrent then any one on this earth for there own blind sins.

Depend on God to save you from it, not your self.

 

[Mark Quayle]

In 08 I decided I needed a shrink for my voices.

I was doing just fine. I go in and get out on Risperdal. The voices started to go away but I had this huge anxiety from my OCD.

I get put in gabapentin and nothing was working.

I go to the psych ward and a person was taking klonopin.

I asked him to throw one over the wall. I found them and my anxiety melted away.

I see it as God’s test that I failed.


In 2010 I found a doc willing to prescribe it.

I slowly started to backslide.


In 2015 Dr. Holloway passed away. In 2017 I was yanked off three my. My chastisement.

Here I am today, abusing gabapentin because of my excruciating amount of anxiety. I blame no one but myself.


I ask how can God forgive a wretch like me and how can I overcome this addictions.


Father please help me, don’t just answer a prayer but help me more then a conqueror.


Folks I’m a bad Christian, so unworthy. Please help.

I know it's hard to see past your pain, but try to understand this isn't even about you. God is using you for his own purposes. Trust him. Hang desperately onto him. He is not unfaithful, but will not do what you think you need, but what he plans to use you for, he will do in you. Trust him. Give him your whole heart, not just the part that sees your need.

 

[devin553344]

In 08 I decided I needed a shrink for my voices.

I was doing just fine. I go in and get out on Risperdal. The voices started to go away but I had this huge anxiety from my OCD.

I get put in gabapentin and nothing was working.

I go to the psych ward and a person was taking klonopin.

I asked him to throw one over the wall. I found them and my anxiety melted away.

I see it as God’s test that I failed.


In 2010 I found a doc willing to prescribe it.

I slowly started to backslide.


In 2015 Dr. Holloway passed away. In 2017 I was yanked off three my. My chastisement.

Here I am today, abusing gabapentin because of my excruciating amount of anxiety. I blame no one but myself.


I ask how can God forgive a wretch like me and how can I overcome this addictions.


Father please help me, don’t just answer a prayer but help me more then a conqueror.


Folks I’m a bad Christian, so unworthy. Please help.

What help do you want? What do you hope we can do for you?

 

[Kenny'sID]

I asked him to throw one over the wall. I found them and my anxiety melted away.

I see it as God’s test that I failed.

Doesn't sound like failure to me, or God's test..more like your test out of desperation and it succeded. Did you tell your Dr the klonopin worked for reducing your anxiety? Or was there some other reason you couldn't take it?

 

[dabro]

Klonopin is the cream of the crop med. it takes almost every problem I have mentally away.

Since it’s a C III CONTROLLED substance docs are so easy doling it out.