I really miss playing

[Neostarwcc]

I have to confess, I really miss playing video games. It's been about a month since I detoxed World of Warcraft out of my life and out of my wife's life. My Lithium poisoning helped a lot with quitting because it made hoping on the computer all day impossible.


I'm probably well enough to play for an hour a day, turn on audible and just relax instead of doing mythic dungeons for an hour and yelling at the noobs.


The problem? I don't want to be living in sin. Video games (especially the RPGS I enjoy playing with my wife) are sinful to play. I should be avoiding magic like the plague but yet... I feel like I'll never be set free from Computers and Video Games the only two lives aside from God I've ever known.

I'm telling you guys these things to ask what I should do. Should I play for no more than an hour a day and play a bit of St.Augustines commentaries? Or should I just try to find another pathway in my life and just give up games all together? I'm just scared. I'm scared of living in sin. Yes, Christ died for all our sins but you cannot take grace and spit all over it by living in this one potential sin for the rest of your life... then I'll hear "depart from me" instead of "Well done". I fear God's judgement if I fail in even one area of life, or if I don't live my life perfectly as Jesus wanted me to. I'm scared.

It wouldn't be so bad if I knew for sure whether or not video games were a sin. But, of course aside from don't practice magic it says nothing. Then you have to wonder if playing pixels who happen to use fictional magic that I'm in no way casting is really "practicing magic" or not. :eyeroll: advice?

 

[Ceallaigh]

I've played Lord of the Rings Online for about 5 years. If you're familiar with the books and or movies, then you know the limits of that world. Considering how tame it is, I've never considered playing it sinful in and of itself. Wasting too much time and getting too absorbed in something can be sinful though. Oh and sometimes I listen Christian books and lectures etc that are on youtube while I play. That way both my human self and spirit self get something out of it.

 

[GreekOrthodox]

I've played Lord of the Rings Online for about 5 years. If you're familiar with the books and or movies, then you know the limits of that world. Considering how tame it is, I've never considered playing it sinful in and of itself. Wasting too much time and getting too absorbed in something can be sinful though. Oh and sometimes I listen Christian books and lectures etc that are on youtube while I play. That way both my human self and spirit self get something out of it.

I stopped playing LOTRO about 6 years ago, but when I was playing, one thing I noticed is that the typical players were mature. Nothing like a 24 person raid stopping because someone yelled, "kids are fighting".

 

[Ceallaigh]

I stopped playing LOTRO about 6 years ago, but when I was playing, one thing I noticed is that the typical players were mature. Nothing like a 24 person raid stopping because someone yelled, "kids are fighting".

I've heard that rank behavior and course language from other players in an mmorpg can be one of the problems for a Christian. But since I almost always solo and ignore game chat, I've never experienced it.

 

[Freth]

I have to confess, I really miss playing video games. It's been about a month since I detoxed World of Warcraft out of my life and out of my wife's life. My Lithium poisoning helped a lot with quitting because it made hoping on the computer all day impossible.


I'm probably well enough to play for an hour a day, turn on audible and just relax instead of doing mythic dungeons for an hour and yelling at the noobs.


The problem? I don't want to be living in sin. Video games (especially the RPGS I enjoy playing with my wife) are sinful to play. I should be avoiding magic like the plague but yet... I feel like I'll never be set free from Computers and Video Games the only two lives aside from God I've ever known.

I'm telling you guys these things to ask what I should do. Should I play for no more than an hour a day and play a bit of St.Augustines commentaries? Or should I just try to find another pathway in my life and just give up games all together? I'm just scared. I'm scared of living in sin. Yes, Christ died for all our sins but you cannot take grace and spit all over it by living in this one potential sin for the rest of your life... then I'll hear "depart from me" instead of "Well done". I fear God's judgement if I fail in even one area of life, or if I don't live my life perfectly as Jesus wanted me to. I'm scared.

It wouldn't be so bad if I knew for sure whether or not video games were a sin. But, of course aside from don't practice magic it says nothing. Then you have to wonder if playing pixels who happen to use fictional magic that I'm in no way casting is really "practicing magic" or not. :eyeroll: advice?

The question as to whether it's sinful or not is easily answered. Has it become your god? Has it become idolatry? Does it glorify God? Does it have you practicing virtual sin and abomination for entertainment? I ignored the answers to these questions for a long time, but it kept nagging at me until I made the decision to quit cold turkey.

Like you, I have spent most of my life (some 40+ years) on the computer, much of that time spent gaming. I have heavily invested my life in over a dozen MMORPG's over the years, including World of Warcraft. The latest I spent 5,275 hours playing, which isn't much for an MMORPG that can engulf years of your life.

I love gaming, and that's the problem. I can't be a devout Christian and game. The two fight each other for my time, and I know for a fact I'll choose gaming every time, which leaves no time for God. I had to quit because reducing the time I allow myself to game doesn't help, it just turns into longer hours anyway.

I'd still be playing modded Skyrim right now if I hadn't put my foot down and decided that lukewarm Christianity isn't Christianity at all.

Is gaming a sin? I think we all know the answer to that, if we are truly honest with ourselves, about the time we spend doing it, the things it has us doing for entertainment, and the way it puts God on the backburner. A personal relationship with Jesus isn't going to happen if you're running instances long hours every day.

Those are my thoughts. God bless!

 

[Neostarwcc]

I've played Lord of the Rings Online for about 5 years. If you're familiar with the books and or movies, then you know the limits of that world. Considering how tame it is, I've never considered playing it sinful in and of itself. Wasting too much time and getting too absorbed in something can be sinful though. Oh and sometimes I listen Christian books and lectures etc that are on youtube while I play. That way both my human self and spirit self get something out of it.

I know LOTR was made by a Catholic and the Narnia series by an Arminian but why wouldn't playing LOTR be sinful when your character or those on your side use magic? I'm not trying to get you to see your sinfulness (not at all) I'm trying to see mine if there's any there. I mean some of the time I would play a warlock. I even got

Idk if you're familiar with warlocks on WoW but there is a spec that summons demons (obviously) there's a spec that I usually play that is fire magic and another spec that's based on Shadow magic which can be dark magic based I guess? It's not nearly as bad as demonology anyway. Even if it's a video game I'd never want to summon demons to gain power. Just.... no.

 

[Neostarwcc]

The question as to whether it's sinful or not is easily answered. Has it become your god? Has it become idolatry? Does it glorify God? Does it have you practicing virtual sin and abomination for entertainment? I ignored the answers to these questions for a long time, but it kept nagging at me until I made the decision to quit cold turkey.

Like you, I have spent most of my life (some 40+ years) on the computer, much of that time spent gaming. I have heavily invested my life in over a dozen MMORPG's over the years, including World of Warcraft. The latest I spent 5,275 hours playing, which isn't much for an MMORPG that can engulf years of your life.

I love gaming, and that's the problem. I can't be a devout Christian and game. The two fight each other for my time, and I know for a fact I'll choose gaming every time, which leaves no time for God. I had to quit because reducing the time I allow myself to game doesn't help, it just turns into longer hours anyway.

I'd still be playing modded Skyrim right now if I hadn't put my foot down and decided that lukewarm Christianity isn't Christianity at all.

Is gaming a sin? I think we all know the answer to that, if we are truly honest with ourselves, about the time we spend doing it, the things it has us doing for entertainment, and the way it puts God on the backburner. A personal relationship with Jesus isn't going to happen if you're running instances long hours every day.

Those are my thoughts. God bless!

When I was a year old until God found me I played video games all day. Within the last a l most decade my video game playing has drastically decreased. I would most of the time get on at 7 am when I woke up and would log off around 3 or 4. To help pass the time I would add something religious to it. Some people here know I used to use online games to spread the gospel and to make friends. I have maybe 30 or so online friends that I made over the years that I'm close to and usually talk to everytime were both on. I see your point, we've both lived the same life, video games can be addicting but my concerns aren't "how much am I playing?" Because I don't play even remotely close to I used to. When I was in my early 20s 34 hour grinds were commonplace. I've made drastic progress. Actually? Idk what I'm trying to say. I'm scared as to whether or not playing video games that contain magic in them will consume my soul. God has been silent on this and I'd love to know. But, maybe it just cant be answered.

 

[GreekOrthodox]

I've heard that rank behavior and course language from other players in an mmorpg can be one of the problems for a Christian. But since I almost always solo and ignore game chat, I've never experienced it.

That was the best thing about LOTRO was that since it was not popular among youth, the player base was more mature and casual players who would hop on for a few hours at most. I think the typical age was 30-40s where they had kids but wanted some socialization where you weren't tied down for a 12 hour raid. So the behavior was fairly civilized

Soloing or small groups was fairly common. If you needed help on some quest, you could turn on the world chat and see if someone of high level could give you a hand.

 

[Freth]

When I was a year old until God found me I played video games all day. Within the last a l most decade my video game playing has drastically decreased. I would most of the time get on at 7 am when I woke up and would log off around 3 or 4. To help pass the time I would add something religious to it. Some people here know I used to use online games to spread the gospel and to make friends. I have maybe 30 or so online friends that I made over the years that I'm close to and usually talk to everytime were both on. I see your point, we've both lived the same life, video games can be addicting but my concerns aren't "how much am I playing?" Because I don't play even remotely close to I used to. When I was in my early 20s 34 hour grinds were commonplace. I've made drastic progress. Actually? Idk what I'm trying to say. I'm scared as to whether or not playing video games that contain magic in them will consume my soul. God has been silent on this and I'd love to know. But, maybe it just cant be answered.

I often quote these verses when the subject of gaming comes up:

Matthew 6:24 No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.

1 John 2:15 Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
​

The love of God causes us to want to let go of the world. The love of the world causes us to want to let go of God. The two cannot co-exist. You will love one and despise the other, because one has to take precedence, and the other suffers for it. Love is unconditional.

This is why I quit gaming. It's not about whether this theme or that theme is bad, it's whether we love the Father enough to let go of the world and focus solely on Him.

John 14:21 He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.
​

God bless!

 

[aiki]

I have to confess, I really miss playing video games. It's been about a month since I detoxed World of Warcraft out of my life and out of my wife's life. My Lithium poisoning helped a lot with quitting because it made hoping on the computer all day impossible.


I'm probably well enough to play for an hour a day, turn on audible and just relax instead of doing mythic dungeons for an hour and yelling at the noobs.


The problem? I don't want to be living in sin. Video games (especially the RPGS I enjoy playing with my wife) are sinful to play. I should be avoiding magic like the plague but yet... I feel like I'll never be set free from Computers and Video Games the only two lives aside from God I've ever known.

Friend, God doesn't expect you to change in this way. You will, sooner or later, do what you most want to do. We are fundamentally driven by our desires as human beings, as God made us to be. We are also ordered powerfully in our behavior by habit. Both of these things are acting upon you in your life right now and the chances of just shrugging off their force in shaping your conduct by yourself is essentially nil. Oh, you might go on in your own strength for a bit in resisting the gaming impulse, but if God doesn't take over the struggle and free you from it, sooner or later, you will return to gaming.

What's the alternative to fighting with yourself? If you don't force yourself to a new, more God-honoring way of living, how will such living come to pass in your life? Submission. Constant, daily submission to God. It's only when we submit to God's will and way, giving Him full control of all we are throughout each day, that He works - or, more precisely, the Holy Spirit does - to dull inordinate or sinful desire and create new, stronger, Christ-centered desires in us, at the same time drawing us into study of God's word, our "spiritual food," strengthening and transforming us thereby.

As Paul the apostle wrote, God gives us both the desire and the ability to do His will. (Philippians 2:13) We need both in order to walk in His ways according to His will. In fact, the ability to do God's will resides in the desire He gives to us for Himself; for it is desire, ultimately, that shapes human conduct. We call this desire "love," but at its core, what we are talking about is desire. The Psalmist described this desire, this love, for God as "thirsting," and "longing," and "hunger" and it stands as the supreme motivation for our walking with God in a holy, World-forsaking way. (Matthew 22:36-38; 1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

This love is shed abroad in our hearts at the moment we are saved by the Holy Spirit (Romans 5:5) coming to dwell within us, cleansing and regenerating us with himself. (Titus 3:5; Romans 8:9-11) He will fill us with himself and the love that he is only as we submit to him entire, yielding ourselves as a living sacrifice to him. (Romans 12:1; Romans 6:13-22) As we do, progressively, over time, bit by bit, he moves to reform us after the Person of Christ, in concert with our submission to him, transforming us and bringing us into freedom from bondage to all things that are not of God. This is his work for us, though, which we simply receive and manifest in our living.

 

[com7fy8]

Video games (especially the RPGS I enjoy playing with my wife) are sinful to play.

Hopefully, you can work things out with your wife so you are giving each other attention, in whatever you do.

But I agree, how magic stuff can be not good. For me, it seems like taking shortcuts, versus learning in real life how to work things out, with God and with one another > this is more challenging, by the way, and quite an education and adventure much more interesting than fantasy stuff. But this is possible only with God.

 

[Ceallaigh]

I have to confess, I really miss playing video games. It's been about a month since I detoxed World of Warcraft out of my life and out of my wife's life. My Lithium poisoning helped a lot with quitting because it made hoping on the computer all day impossible.


I'm probably well enough to play for an hour a day, turn on audible and just relax instead of doing mythic dungeons for an hour and yelling at the noobs.


The problem? I don't want to be living in sin. Video games (especially the RPGS I enjoy playing with my wife) are sinful to play. I should be avoiding magic like the plague but yet... I feel like I'll never be set free from Computers and Video Games the only two lives aside from God I've ever known.

I'm telling you guys these things to ask what I should do. Should I play for no more than an hour a day and play a bit of St.Augustines commentaries? Or should I just try to find another pathway in my life and just give up games all together? I'm just scared. I'm scared of living in sin. Yes, Christ died for all our sins but you cannot take grace and spit all over it by living in this one potential sin for the rest of your life... then I'll hear "depart from me" instead of "Well done". I fear God's judgement if I fail in even one area of life, or if I don't live my life perfectly as Jesus wanted me to. I'm scared.

It wouldn't be so bad if I knew for sure whether or not video games were a sin. But, of course aside from don't practice magic it says nothing. Then you have to wonder if playing pixels who happen to use fictional magic that I'm in no way casting is really "practicing magic" or not. :eyeroll: advice?

Magic in a video game isn't the same thing as practicing Wiccan magick, which I'm sure you probably don't know the first thing about. While I don't know much about it myself, I'm pretty sure it doesn't involve clicking on icons.

 

[NBB]

There is nothing wrong in firing up a game sometimes, is like a movie or something, or better because you can do stuff yourself, but if you think you can be more productive for God without the games and you can go for it, do it. Also games can get really addictive sometimes.

 

[FutureAndAHope]

God is not going to put the heavies on you for playing computer games. Even ones with magic. Take the story of Cinderella as an example, it is a kid's story with magic, yet most people would consider it harmless. God would not judge anyone for reading Cinderella. As a youth, there were many movies, stories I watched that contained magic, and I enjoyed them, without feeling guilty. Sure there were certain ones I would not watch because they glorified real magic or demons, but I never had a problem with the general fantasy genre.

Move onto computer games, it is the same thing, most fantasy genres are just good stories, they are not gross sin.

The only thing that I can see wrong with magic in computer games is it may desensitize some to real magic. But so too could wargames, make a person want to become a soldier.

Again I quote my favorite verse regarding this:

Ecc 7:16-17 Be not given overmuch to righteousness and be not over-wise. Why let destruction come on you? Be not evil overmuch, and be not foolish. Why come to your end before your time?

You are stressed about not playing, a game, it has become "destruction" to you. Your righteousness is killing you, it need not. God is not a killjoy. Know that you can make a choice, God would not be tying your hands.

 

[Sketcher]

I have to confess, I really miss playing video games. It's been about a month since I detoxed World of Warcraft out of my life and out of my wife's life. My Lithium poisoning helped a lot with quitting because it made hoping on the computer all day impossible.


I'm probably well enough to play for an hour a day, turn on audible and just relax instead of doing mythic dungeons for an hour and yelling at the noobs.


The problem? I don't want to be living in sin. Video games (especially the RPGS I enjoy playing with my wife) are sinful to play. I should be avoiding magic like the plague but yet... I feel like I'll never be set free from Computers and Video Games the only two lives aside from God I've ever known.

I'm telling you guys these things to ask what I should do. Should I play for no more than an hour a day and play a bit of St.Augustines commentaries? Or should I just try to find another pathway in my life and just give up games all together? I'm just scared. I'm scared of living in sin. Yes, Christ died for all our sins but you cannot take grace and spit all over it by living in this one potential sin for the rest of your life... then I'll hear "depart from me" instead of "Well done". I fear God's judgement if I fail in even one area of life, or if I don't live my life perfectly as Jesus wanted me to. I'm scared.

It wouldn't be so bad if I knew for sure whether or not video games were a sin. But, of course aside from don't practice magic it says nothing. Then you have to wonder if playing pixels who happen to use fictional magic that I'm in no way casting is really "practicing magic" or not. :eyeroll: advice?

I recall that you described how it got you in a lot of trouble. It was a big part of your life for years, right?

If something's been a big part of your life for years, one month away from it isn't going to flush it completely out of you.

A cousin of mine had quit smoking completely, but took it up again two years later because he missed it.

I had to cut something else out of my life, I think it may have been 3 years or so now since I got rid of it. It could have been longer ago, I don't remember exactly. But I still think about it every day. I don't see that going away without a miracle.

 

[Neostarwcc]

I recall that you described how it got you in a lot of trouble. It was a big part of your life for years, right?

If something's been a big part of your life for years, one month away from it isn't going to flush it completely out of you.

A cousin of mine had quit smoking completely, but took it up again two years later because he missed it.

I had to cut something else out of my life, I think it may have been 3 years or so now since I got rid of it. It could have been longer ago, I don't remember exactly. But I still think about it every day. I don't see that going away without a miracle.

Yes that is all true and you remember correctly. However, I never really gave myself the opportunity to change when I quit either. So there's this nagging feeling of what if? My wife and I have have gametime until February to try. Idk maybe tomorrow morning I'll try and see if I can at the very least spend an hour playing without yelling at my wife. Dunno. I kinda wanna try. People make a good point of "why would God Punish me for this when many worse things exist".

 

[aiki]

Yes that is all true and you remember correctly. However, I never really gave myself the opportunity to change when I quit either. So there's this nagging feeling of what if? My wife and I have have gametime until February to try. Idk maybe tomorrow morning I'll try and see if I can at the very least spend an hour playing without yelling at my wife. Dunno. I kinda wanna try. People make a good point of "why would God Punish me for this when many worse things exist".

You clearly have an addiction to gaming. Your inability to simply and easily walk away from gaming and never bother with it again is indication that this is so. You have been brought under the power of gaming and this is why you are of a double mind about it, feeling on one hand you should abstain, but on the other wanting very much to return to gaming. It is a terrible shame so many fellow believers are urging you to continue in an activity that clearly rules you and will do so more and more, as you give it room in your life.

You should never be yelling at your wife in anger. You are called to meekness, gentleness, humility and peaceableness as a disciple of Jesus Christ, not to outbursts of frustrated shouting. Anything that provokes such conduct toward your wife, in particular, ought to be carefully avoided. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Will God punish you for gaming and being bound by doing so? No. But He will discipline you (Hebrews 12:5-11). And the first casualty of your addiction to gaming, the first act of divine discipline upon this sin, is the "death" of your fellowship with God (Psalms 66:18; Isaiah 59:2; 1 Peter 3:12). So long as you are a servant to gaming, you are not properly under God's control and so cannot walk joyfully and deeply with Him as His servant. All sorts of dark and bitter things tumble out of this state-of-affairs, the corruption of sin that must necessarily issue from being bound under the power of something other than God, bearing deadly fruit in your life. (Galatians 6:7-8; Romans 6:23; James 1:14-15)

 

[FutureAndAHope]

You clearly have an addiction to gaming. Your inability to simply and easily walk away from gaming and never bother with it again is indication that this is so. You have been brought under the power of gaming and this is why you are of a double mind about it, feeling on one hand you should abstain, but on the other wanting very much to return to gaming. It is a terrible shame so many fellow believers are urging you to continue in an activity that clearly rules you and will do so more and more, as you give it room in your life.

I disagree strongly with this statement. Gaming is a pass time, like reading, or fishing. If you asked a person who enjoyed reading to "Give it up", they would strongly protest. It is not an indication that it is an addiction.

Gaming is slightly more addictive than other pastimes because it involves visual/audio stimulus, but it is not a sin.

I really wish I could call out people who protest against gaming, it is obvious that it is not one of your pass-times, but that should not cause you to pull down others' lives, because you disagree with a particular pass time. It is like self-righteous people who are against TV, or any entertainment, they demand strict obedience to their set of rules, but forget that people have a choice under grace.

It actually crushes people, because they feel under threat by God, in things God never intended them to feel bad about in the first place.

You should never be yelling at your wife in anger. You are called to meekness, gentleness, humility and peaceableness as a disciple of Jesus Christ, not to outbursts of frustrated shouting. Anything that provokes such conduct toward your wife, in particular, ought to be carefully avoided.

I agree that there is a need to address the issue with angry outbursts.

 

[aiki]

I disagree strongly with this statement. Gaming is a pass time, like reading, or fishing. If you asked a person who enjoyed reading to "Give it up", they would strongly protest. It is not an indication that it is an addiction.

You're welcome to disagree as much as you'd like.

Gaming is a pastime, yes, but it is not like reading or fishing. Video games are made to be addictive, purposefully manipulating human psychology in promotion of more and more gameplay. This is not the case for reading or fishing. At all. Comparing them as though this isn't the case is rather slippery reasoning.

And it is very much indicative of being in bondage to a thing - especially something that is pure entertainment, serving no useful, practical or necessary purpose - that the OP cannot simply give it up without an internal struggle.

Gaming is slightly more addictive than other pastimes because it involves visual/audio stimulus, but it is not a sin.

I never said gaming was a sin. Being in bondage to gaming is a sin.

I really wish I could call out people who protest against gaming, it is obvious that it is not one of your pass-times, but that should not cause you to pull down others' lives, because you disagree with a particular pass time.

It seems the OP is not the only one addicted to gaming...


I used to game a great deal. Too much, actually. But no longer. The more my life is lived in service to God, the less interest I have in gaming.

I have not pulled down the OPs life; I have pointed out a place of bondage in it and urged a godly response. I wonder why this would trouble you...

It is like self-righteous people who are against TV, or any entertainment, they demand strict obedience to their set of rules, but forget that people have a choice under grace.

This is always the refuge of those with stuff in their lives that shouldn't be in them: call those who point at the bad stuff self-righteous legalists. I have not set out a bunch of personal rules of conduct for the OP, but have urged him to be free of bondage to all but God in his life. Where's the self-righteous legalism in this? Were Paul, Peter, and John just legalists, self-righteously critical of others in their condemnations of their living?

It actually crushes people, because they feel under threat by God, in things God never intended them to feel bad about in the first place.

We are, as believers, never to place ourselves under the power of anything but God in our lives. If we fail to observe this command of God, bad things are guaranteed to follow. Call this threatening, if you like, but it is threatening of the sort a doctor gives to his patient who is obese, or a smoker, or dangerously sedentary when he warns them that, if a change in lifestyle doesn't happen, sickness and death will result.

 

[FutureAndAHope]

And it is very much indicative of being in bondage to a thing - especially something that is pure entertainment, serving no useful, practical or necessary purpose - that the OP cannot simply give it up without an internal struggle.

Ask a fisherman to give up fishing, or someone who likes novels give up reading. They will kick and scream. Reaction to losing your hobbies is not an indication of addiction. It is an indication that you really enjoyed what you were doing. Just because gaming is more addictive than fishing or reading is irrelevant.

I never said gaming was a sin. Being in bondage to gaming is a sin.

But is it bondage? It really depends on the perspective.

It seems the OP is not the only one addicted to gaming...

I guess this is a statement aimed at me. I have always played computer games since I was a youth. I enjoy it, it is what I do for relaxation, outside of meaningful prayer.

The more my life is lived in service to God, the less interest I have in gaming.

Great, that is good that you have found service to the LORD to be more fulfilling. It is good that you have.

I have not pulled down the OPs life; I have pointed out a place of bondage in it and urged a godly response. I wonder why this would trouble you...

It troubled me because the OP is obviously wanting to be able to game. It is not a sin to do so. Even if he has an addiction of a kind, God can work on that with time. Right now, there needs to be the knowledge that God will not be hard on him for his choice.

This is always the refuge of those with stuff in their lives that shouldn't be in them: call those who point at the bad stuff self-righteous legalists. I have not set out a bunch of personal rules of conduct for the OP, but have urged him to be free of bondage to all but God in his life. Where's the self-righteous legalism in this? Were Paul, Peter, and John just legalists, self-righteously critical of others in their condemnations of their living?

No it is not. Everyone must walk their own path with God, the path they feel blessed on. To have others point out their so-called sins, is not helpful.

I have a family, 80% of my life is lived working, and providing for the needs and comfort of my family. Much of the church is in the same situation, we are not all called like Paul to give up everything for the sake of the gospel. Self-denial is not a sign of righteousness, living for God the best we can in our situation is. The rest of my life the other 20% is spent in prayer and at times outreach. I feel 100% comfortable, and safe in my relationship with the LORD. I know that he knows my heart, and if He needs to he will work on areas that are lacking. But for me as a working family man, there is no point in living the life of a monk, I don't need to listen to Hillsong all day long, or read the bible all day long, nor pray for every minute. I need to be a well-balanced witness to my workmates and neighbors, and a part of that is enjoying the natural part of life. Yes the spiritual is vitally important, and I never go, or rarely go a day without an hour in prayer, praying for others, and I reach out where I can.

We are, as believers, never to place ourselves under the power of anything but God in our lives. If we fail to observe this command of God, bad things are guaranteed to follow. Call this threatening, if you like, but it is threatening of the sort a doctor gives to his patient who is obese, or a smoker, or dangerously sedentary when he warns them that, if a change in lifestyle doesn't happen, sickness and death will result.

There is nothing to fear, in enjoying life. Solomon in all his wisdom commended this very fact.

Ecc 8:15 Then I commended mirth, because a man hath no better thing under the sun, than to eat, and to drink, and to be merry: for that shall abide with him of his labour the days of his life, which God giveth him under the sun.

Ecc_2:24 There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and that he should make his soul enjoy good in his labour. This also I saw, that it was from the hand of God.

We have labour, but mirth helps us forget the burden of life. It is a gift of God. Pray, righteousness, and serving God a vital, but to purge mirth, for a family man is not always wise either.