I need to change

[JacquelineDeane55]

The more and more I read the Bible, the more and more I see that I don't measure up. The Bible is full of moral principles and rules that are impossible for mankind to keep because we all have a sin nature. I myself see that I fall short. No matter how hard I try to on my own, I cannot keep GOD's laws. GOD tells us to love one another, but I have this problem in my inner person (my heart) that sometimes keeps me from feeling any emotion. Sometimes I go through long periods of when I am not able to feel any emotion at all. I have told mom of that problem, I do not know whether it is a medical condition or not but she doesn't know either because we are not doctors. I have been meaning to speak to my doctors of why I am like this emotionally, but I keep forgetting to speak to them about it. Perhaps I will write me a note.

I know that being unable to feel any emotion at all is not Christlike (nor is it really natural), but I cannot help it. I know that Love, Joy...those are emotions. But sometimes I have no love, and sometimes I have no joy. I just can't feel anything at all. I can see that I am far from a perfect person. I have also had periods when I have had no peace in my life, when I have wished for God's peace but it did not come. So I know what torment and suffering are like.

I don't know what is wrong with me in that area or why my heart is like that, but at the same time it makes me feel really guilty because I don't measure up to GOD's standards of moral perfection. I don't think any of us do.

When see myself in light of GOD's word, it makes me really, really scared that He is going to judge me. That He looks upon me with anger because I don't measure up to His standards of moral perfection. It makes me tremble with fear and get on my knees and pray and confess to Him that I am sinner. I don't remember how many times I have done that, all because I was really frightened at how He looks at me and sees me and how He thinks about me. Also I was scared out of my mind that I was going to go to Hell when I died. I don't want to go into place of eternal suffering because I already have had so much suffering in this life and I know what it like and I don't want more of the same. I really wish I wasn't this scared. I just want a better life. I know that GOD does not promise to us a good life, but something deep own inside me wishes that He did.

I need to grow in GOD's grace and to be more Christlike, but you see, that is the thing. I don't know how to change on my own (how to change how I am on the inside, you know, my thoughts, my heart, my feelings), I have tried to change under my own power but it hasn't worked. I don't think anyone can change who they are what they are like on the inside. So I think that maybe GOD has to help me to change. I have prayed to Him and I have asked Him to help me change, but so far nothing has happened. He knows that I cannot do it on my own, so why is He not helping me? Why is He not answering me? A lot of my prayers have been met with silence.

I am the same person that I was years ago. Nothing about me has changed. That scares me even more, because I know that if I don't change to become more like Christ, then I could risk having His judgment on me. But you see, recognizing sin in my life (I don't even have a full understanding of what sin is) and trying to get rid of it is almost next to impossible. I have doing that living the Christian life is no cakewalk, it actually very hard. I am actually struggling in my Christian walk, struggling to be and live like Jesus did. It's really, really hard to try to be more like Jesus.

If I don't know what sin is or what specific sins are, how can I get rid of it in my life? How can I train my mind to pinpoint when I am sinning? Sometimes we sin and we don't know that we are doing it, sometimes that has happened to me as well. Like, I did something and only later I realized what I did might have been sinful.

Please pray for me, I am really scared. I am scared of GOD's judgment. I am scared of His anger and wrath. I am scared of the Devil and what he can do to me. I want GOD's mercy and pardon, I want Him to show me His love and compassion and to help me change inside, but something keeps convincing me that I am going to be judged for some reason.

 

[JacquelineDeane55]

LORD, please help me to be more like you. Please help me to lead a life that is pleasing to you. Please help me not to sin. You understand my flaws and my shortcomings Lord, and I am asking for your help. Please help me to be more like You, Lord, because I can't change on my own. I have no power to change myself Lord, it is all your power. Amen.

Now that I have told you guys my struggles and some of my issues, what I don't want is for you to point your finger at me and judge me. It's not every day that someone admits their problems and imperfections. I cannot help the way that I am, which is why I want GOD to help me with myself.

 

[JacquelineDeane55]

The Bible says things like, "Be ye holy, for I am holy." And, "Be perfect, because your father in Heaven is also perfect."

Except, I don't know how to be perfect and holy on my own. I feel like this is a command that is impossible to keep. He said that when He knew we are all sinners, so why does He expect us to keep His commandments when we are not saved? He knows we cannot lead a sinless lifestyle without His help.

I am trying to think logically, but nothing makes sense.

I am also afraid that anyone who does not measure up to God's perfect moral standards He will judge, even though He knows that none of us are perfect and no one can really keep His law. Does that mean He is an unloving, harsh judge after all? I am afraid of being judged and hurt and tormented like I already have been so many times. What I need is love and understanding, not judgment and condemnation. I hope He understands that.

I am so paralyzed by fear I can hardly move. How can I get over the fear of GOD judging me and sentencing me to Hell?

I am afraid of Hell. I don't want to go there. I would gladly give up any earthly possessions I had if it meant I could go to Heaven.

 

[macek]

God bless you, sister in Jesus name. What you describe is something we all struggle with. No one is perfect in this world but Him who died for our sins on the cross. I see you are truly concerned about your heart and i can relate to your wishes, sister. You are on the right path, sister though you may not realize it now. Let Jesus guide you in this, cry out to him for guidance for you are correct we cannot change ourselves but He moves our heart.

I will pray for you, sister, do not despair, trust in the Lord.

edit: this video may help you, i invite you to listen.

 

[paul1149]

Come to Me, all those toiling and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” -Matt 11:28-30​

The answer is to draw near to God, and to keep at it. Great ships are not turned around in an instant. It's a process. You've basically written the second half of Romans 7 in your own words, you now need to turn the page over to chapter 8. Prayer, stay in the Word (not necessarily covering a lot of ground, but reading to meet the Lord personally), keep praising Him at all times, in everything. Keep inviting Holy Spirit in, and cultivate dependence on the Lord. Keep at it, and you will change. The fear of Hell might be a legitimate driver in the beginning, but we need to grow in confidence toward Him, and we do that when we shift the burden of salvation from ourselves to Him. The joy of the Lord is our strength, and knowing what He has done for us, out of sheer love, will bring that joy.

edit: sorry, I didn't realize this was the prayer forum. Praying for you, Jacqueline. Blessings.

 

[Idromos247]

When I realized that I could in no way measure up It made that gospel that much more beautiful. God knows you will never be good enough and he still wants you. What could be more awesome? You can steal your own joy by judging yourself too harshly. We should always try to improve and pray for forgiveness.

 

[Serving Zion]

The more and more I read the Bible, the more and more I see that I don't measure up. The Bible is full of moral principles and rules that are impossible for mankind to keep because we all have a sin nature. I myself see that I fall short. No matter how hard I try to on my own, I cannot keep GOD's laws. GOD tells us to love one another, but I have this problem in my inner person (my heart) that sometimes keeps me from feeling any emotion. Sometimes I go through long periods of when I am not able to feel any emotion at all. I have told mom of that problem, I do not know whether it is a medical condition or not but she doesn't know either because we are not doctors. I have been meaning to speak to my doctors of why I am like this emotionally, but I keep forgetting to speak to them about it. Perhaps I will write me a note.

I know that being unable to feel any emotion at all is not Christlike (nor is it really natural), but I cannot help it. I know that Love, Joy...those are emotions. But sometimes I have no love, and sometimes I have no joy. I just can't feel anything at all. I can see that I am far from a perfect person. I have also had periods when I have had no peace in my life, when I have wished for God's peace but it did not come. So I know what torment and suffering are like.

I don't know what is wrong with me in that area or why my heart is like that, but at the same time it makes me feel really guilty because I don't measure up to GOD's standards of moral perfection. I don't think any of us do.

When see myself in light of GOD's word, it makes me really, really scared that He is going to judge me. That He looks upon me with anger because I don't measure up to His standards of moral perfection. It makes me tremble with fear and get on my knees and pray and confess to Him that I am sinner. I don't remember how many times I have done that, all because I was really frightened at how He looks at me and sees me and how He thinks about me. Also I was scared out of my mind that I was going to go to Hell when I died. I don't want to go into place of eternal suffering because I already have had so much suffering in this life and I know what it like and I don't want more of the same. I really wish I wasn't this scared. I just want a better life. I know that GOD does not promise to us a good life, but something deep own inside me wishes that He did.

I need to grow in GOD's grace and to be more Christlike, but you see, that is the thing. I don't know how to change on my own (how to change how I am on the inside, you know, my thoughts, my heart, my feelings), I have tried to change under my own power but it hasn't worked. I don't think anyone can change who they are what they are like on the inside. So I think that maybe GOD has to help me to change. I have prayed to Him and I have asked Him to help me change, but so far nothing has happened. He knows that I cannot do it on my own, so why is He not helping me? Why is He not answering me? A lot of my prayers have been met with silence.

I am the same person that I was years ago. Nothing about me has changed. That scares me even more, because I know that if I don't change to become more like Christ, then I could risk having His judgment on me. But you see, recognizing sin in my life (I don't even have a full understanding of what sin is) and trying to get rid of it is almost next to impossible. I have doing that living the Christian life is no cakewalk, it actually very hard. I am actually struggling in my Christian walk, struggling to be and live like Jesus did. It's really, really hard to try to be more like Jesus.

If I don't know what sin is or what specific sins are, how can I get rid of it in my life? How can I train my mind to pinpoint when I am sinning? Sometimes we sin and we don't know that we are doing it, sometimes that has happened to me as well. Like, I did something and only later I realized what I did might have been sinful.

Please pray for me, I am really scared. I am scared of GOD's judgment. I am scared of His anger and wrath. I am scared of the Devil and what he can do to me. I want GOD's mercy and pardon, I want Him to show me His love and compassion and to help me change inside, but something keeps convincing me that I am going to be judged for some reason.

Dear Heavenly Father, this is sad. Our dear sister here has become so confused so quickly.. Lord, only two weeks ago she was a bold lion, strong in zeal for your mission, searching out tracts, and keen to hit the streets. Now she's suffering under very false accusations that she even feels like her salvation has been compromised! Oh dear Lord, you know what has happened to her, the words that have impacted her mind, the many false doctrines and inferior spirits that the backslidden Christians have burdened her with. We condemn those evil spirits in the name of Jesus and we proclaim that our sister will not be shaken. Heavenly Father, sister Jacqueline really needs your help with what she's going through, because only you know how to restore her confidence of salvation. Lord God, we pray in Jesus' name for your intervention, to raise her awareness of where these problems are rooted, and to know what changes will bring about a release. Amen.

Jacqueline, I just have to tell you the plain truth: that you have the love of Christ in your heart and it flows out to people unreservedly. I remember exactly the manner that you reacted when you said you had been finding witchcraft websites. You found out that witches like to curse Christians, and your response was "why would someone want to do that? That's so mean!". Your heart is beautiful, sister. The devil is the accuser of the brethren (Revelation 12:10) so don't believe his lies! There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ.

Pick up the bible again and read it without any fear of condemnation, knowing that God loves you and He just wants to tell you how much He loves you.

As for your sins, you should not be fearful of committing sins. You already know the things that you definitely shouldn't do, and that's enough because you don't do what you know you shouldn't do! If Jesus wants to give you a new knowledge of what sin is, then He will do that and you won't be confused about it at all. If you have suspicions but not certainty, then get specific help to know for sure. Just, we all need to be reminded of this sometimes, that we need to trust Him fully and let go of our worries, because He has said "take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light" and "do not be anxious about tomorrow, for each day has enough evil in itself".

I am going to keep praying for you, but please just don't even believe that lying spirit that is trying to make you doubt who God is and who you are to Him!

 

[musicalpilgrim]

Some very good advice above, and a good video

John 3:16 says everything... in fact verse 17 as well,
the reason Jesus died was because there was no way we could solve the problems we get ourselves in.
Just say thank you to our wonderful Lord for his sacrifice and his great love for you.

John 3:16,17
16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.

 

[vinsight4u]

/nvm

 

[Dave G.]

Dear Jacqueline, those old testament laws are plentiful but you are supposed to see that you can't keep them all, it's actually good that you have seen that. God knew this and that is why Jesus died on the cross for us. I sound like a broken record around here, it's all about Jesus, it always was all about Jesus and it always will be all about Jesus. Pray to Him on your concerns. Keep Jesus front and center.

As to your emotions or seeming emotionless, I have read where this is common in autism cases. So yes, you might want to speak with someone about that so you can come to the best understanding of this ( far be it from me to know, it's just something I read about). Whether you know it or not you do display empathy, though you may not feel that way. You have the Love of Christ in your heart, whether you can recognize it or not. And you are extremely intelligent whether you know what to do with it or not.

God Bless you sweetheart !

 

[mukk_in]

The more and more I read the Bible, the more and more I see that I don't measure up. The Bible is full of moral principles and rules that are impossible for mankind to keep because we all have a sin nature. I myself see that I fall short. No matter how hard I try to on my own, I cannot keep GOD's laws. GOD tells us to love one another, but I have this problem in my inner person (my heart) that sometimes keeps me from feeling any emotion. Sometimes I go through long periods of when I am not able to feel any emotion at all. I have told mom of that problem, I do not know whether it is a medical condition or not but she doesn't know either because we are not doctors. I have been meaning to speak to my doctors of why I am like this emotionally, but I keep forgetting to speak to them about it. Perhaps I will write me a note.

I know that being unable to feel any emotion at all is not Christlike (nor is it really natural), but I cannot help it. I know that Love, Joy...those are emotions. But sometimes I have no love, and sometimes I have no joy. I just can't feel anything at all. I can see that I am far from a perfect person. I have also had periods when I have had no peace in my life, when I have wished for God's peace but it did not come. So I know what torment and suffering are like.

I don't know what is wrong with me in that area or why my heart is like that, but at the same time it makes me feel really guilty because I don't measure up to GOD's standards of moral perfection. I don't think any of us do.

When see myself in light of GOD's word, it makes me really, really scared that He is going to judge me. That He looks upon me with anger because I don't measure up to His standards of moral perfection. It makes me tremble with fear and get on my knees and pray and confess to Him that I am sinner. I don't remember how many times I have done that, all because I was really frightened at how He looks at me and sees me and how He thinks about me. Also I was scared out of my mind that I was going to go to Hell when I died. I don't want to go into place of eternal suffering because I already have had so much suffering in this life and I know what it like and I don't want more of the same. I really wish I wasn't this scared. I just want a better life. I know that GOD does not promise to us a good life, but something deep own inside me wishes that He did.

I need to grow in GOD's grace and to be more Christlike, but you see, that is the thing. I don't know how to change on my own (how to change how I am on the inside, you know, my thoughts, my heart, my feelings), I have tried to change under my own power but it hasn't worked. I don't think anyone can change who they are what they are like on the inside. So I think that maybe GOD has to help me to change. I have prayed to Him and I have asked Him to help me change, but so far nothing has happened. He knows that I cannot do it on my own, so why is He not helping me? Why is He not answering me? A lot of my prayers have been met with silence.

I am the same person that I was years ago. Nothing about me has changed. That scares me even more, because I know that if I don't change to become more like Christ, then I could risk having His judgment on me. But you see, recognizing sin in my life (I don't even have a full understanding of what sin is) and trying to get rid of it is almost next to impossible. I have doing that living the Christian life is no cakewalk, it actually very hard. I am actually struggling in my Christian walk, struggling to be and live like Jesus did. It's really, really hard to try to be more like Jesus.

If I don't know what sin is or what specific sins are, how can I get rid of it in my life? How can I train my mind to pinpoint when I am sinning? Sometimes we sin and we don't know that we are doing it, sometimes that has happened to me as well. Like, I did something and only later I realized what I did might have been sinful.

Please pray for me, I am really scared. I am scared of GOD's judgment. I am scared of His anger and wrath. I am scared of the Devil and what he can do to me. I want GOD's mercy and pardon, I want Him to show me His love and compassion and to help me change inside, but something keeps convincing me that I am going to be judged for some reason.

Christianity isn't about perfection. It's about faith expressing itself in love. Perfection will come in time. God bless .

 

[LoricaLady]

I believe things will turn out well for your spiritually. Mho. You have a sense of conviction and that is the first step for all of us.

What is sin? Well, study the Word as it tells you in detail.

You are right that trying doesn't seem to work. I believe the biggest hindrance to spiritual growth is seen when we keep trying and trying. It's like so often we just don't get it that trying ain't workin'!
If there is a big enough stronghold, like temper or low self worth, or whatever, you can't make it go away by trying to make it go away! Often we have allowed the problems through our own bad choices and we are told "Whoever continues to sin becomes a slave to sin."

So, how do you quit being a slave? Well, the devil is bigger than us and his chains are stronger than us once they go on. But there is One Who came to set us free. He is infinitely stronger than the devil. However, He has also been called The Perfect Gentleman. If he sees we want to try on our own efforts to do something, even though He knows we cannot do it, He will let us until we come to the point of surrender in our hearts, and let HIM free us.

He said "Without Me you can do nothing." That was not an understatment. Praying you will quit trying and truly turn it all over to Him.

 

[brinny]

Bless yer heart, Jacqueline. What a precious prayer request. praying for you dear heart (((hug)))

 

[PloverWing]

Lord, we hold up to you your daughter Jacqueline. Surround her with your presence in this difficult time, and let her know how much you love her. Amen.

 

[Lily76_]

praying

 

[Cturtle]

I need to grow in GOD's grace and to be more Christlike, but you see, that is the thing. I don't know how to change on my own (how to change how I am on the inside, you know, my thoughts, my heart, my feelings),

Hi Jacqueline,

The Bible gives us the answers that you seek. Romans 12:2 says...
Romans 12:2
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

And in
Joshua 1:8
This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.

[Not in your own strength] for it is God Who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for His good pleasure and satisfaction and delight.
Philippians 2:13 AMPC

On the day we were born again God placed or filled our hearts with His love, so that we dont have to rely on our own. (Romans 5:5). And when Christ went to the cross he fulfilled all the laws.. so the only 2 major ones that we need to abide by are loving the Lord our God with all our heart, and soul and loving our neighbor as ourselves.

So as you fill your heart with His Word... you are renewing your mind, and it will do the job at transforming you into what He desires you to be... just like his Son. And then all any of us needs to do is to make our souls (mind, will and emotions) submit to His ways... being a doer of the Word instead of just a hearer.

God bless you mightily... your in our prayers!

 

[rockytopva]

Father I pray blessings on this request and for a victorious life that will bring you glory in Jesus name I pray. Also taking these needs before God in prayer on the bbnradio.org Family Altar program... BBN Program Schedule

 

[brinny]

Praying Jacqueline (((hug)))

 

[insurchoftruth]

It is the Holy Spirit in us, who is helping us to resist temptation. Of course we all sin from time to time, not because we want, but because of our sinful nature in our bodies, and because of our weaknesses. But the Holy Spirit in us is giving us the ability and power, to overcome sin. Otherwise, without his power and help, we can not resist sin, and are helpless against sin. Jesus said, that without him, we can do nothing.

And, God knows that we can never can be good enough morally for him, but he sent Jesus our Lord, who is good enough for us. What I mean is, that Jesus did everything necessary for us, which we could not do ourselves, to become righteous in the eyes of God, by dying on the cross for our sins. That is called 'grace', which means we got the righteousness from God as a gift for us, 100 percent perfect righteousness from God, by what Jesus did on the cross for us, so that our righteousness does not count. We want to do what is right before God, because his divine nature, and his Holy Spirit in us, make us to want to do what God wants us to do.

 

[Star Dancer]

Praying for you