First of all, don't tell your mom. Now I've been thinking about sin and free-will a bit lately and about human agency and divine mercy. My main line of questioning was something akin to "am I powerless to sin? Am I so weak that I need to seek God for deliverance for every little lust or sin in my life? Or has the Lord equipped me to deal with the sin that pops up in my life?" Essentially my question came down to the relationship between our fleshly minds and the Holy Spirit. I think scripture makes clear that man cannot resist sin and therefore the mind itself is naturally predisposed to sin. Therefore any mental resistance to sin is not a natural one but a supernatural one. I can't explain the mechanistic operations of God on the mind but he certainly takes our heart of stone and gives us a heart of flesh. Therefore I think I satisfied my own inquiry: I was powerless to sin. However I am not so weak "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2Ti 1:7. And the Lord has equipped me to deal with the sin in my life "For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye
through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live. " Rom 8:13. I reference Romans because it is clear that it is through the Spirit in Christ that we have victory over sin and death. You should seriously read Romans asap it is profound and transformative. Even just meditating on 6-8. I will do the same.
Anyways brother I was asking these questions to myself because I too struggle with various sins and I just became so tired of my own weakness! For how long must I suffer myself?! O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? Rom 7:24. I can't do it alone man, I really can't. I need Jesus. That earlier self inquiry of "Am I so weak that I need to seek God for deliverance for every little lust or sin in my life" was essentially a rhetorical question amounting to "be a man!!!" Be like Christ!!! It's why I was asking about the relationship between free-will and sin and God... I don't know how God works, but I know what He wants of me! God wants me to be a man!! We have the Spirit of the living God within us!!
(Jos 1:9) Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.
(2Ti 1:14) That good thing which was committed unto thee keep by the Holy Ghost which dwelleth in us.
(Gal 2:20) I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.
You are not powerless. Christ already delivered us from sin.
(1Co 16:13) Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong.
I love you bro.
Jas 1:2 My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
Jas 1:3 Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.
Jas 1:4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
Jas 1:5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
Jas 1:6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.
Jas 1:7 For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.
Jas 1:8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.
Be strong!!!!!!!!!