I need advice

[kbee125]

Deleted because I don’t want to think about it anymore

 

[Halbhh]

Regardless of every other thing even, a fundamental thing we all need, every believer, is aid from above. And Christ, knowing this, instructed us to pray a prayer to ask for that help, and it wonderfully includes aid/help against temptation as part of the prayer!

So, it's the best of all first step, always, no matter what the temptation is. And then we can also pray specifically about a specific temptation we struggle with also. But prayer is key for us all at times, and I can testify that praying this prayer aids me every day I pray it.

(the 2nd passage here has Christ's short prayer He tells us to pray, which He gave us because we need it)
Matthew 6 NIV

Pray with faith it will be given to you as you ask (Mark chapter 11, we are to believe as we pray). This prayer from Christ Himself we can have total confidence God will grant to us.

 

[Just_a_Christian]

I'm a girl and I have feelings for another girl at my church who I am almost certain struggles with same-sex attraction.

I feel like there's a battle inside me. My spiritual mind sees her a sister in Christ. But my carnal mind desires to be desired by her. It's sick.

I have thought about leaving my church, so I don't have to see her anymore, but I feel like that would just be running away from the problem. What is the appropriate way to handle this?

I'm sorry you have this dilemma! I would run as a last resort, but if it were the last resort, run I would. Best to study God's Word and try to get closer to Him. The Bible says with any temptation there will be an escape route given.

 

[Petros2015]

One of the best ways to deal with lust is to pray for the object of it. Not 'for' them as to have them, but 'for' them as to their benefit - health, peace of mind, body, spirit, spiritual walk. Sounds like you have more of a crush than out and out lust, but it would probably work just the same. Hard to fantasize about someone when you are praying for their true benefit.

 

[kbee125]

Regardless of every other thing even, a fundamental thing we all need, every believer, is aid from above. And Christ, knowing this, instructed us to pray a prayer to ask for that help, and it wonderfully includes aid/help against temptation as part of the prayer!

So, it's the best of all first step, always, no matter what the temptation is. And then we can also pray specifically about a specific temptation we struggle with also. But prayer is key for us all at times, and I can testify that praying this prayer aids me every day I pray it.

(the 2nd passage here has Christ's short prayer He tells us to pray, which He gave us because we need it)
Matthew 6 NIV

Pray with faith it will be given to you as you ask (Mark chapter 11, we are to believe as we pray). This prayer from Christ Himself we can have total confidence God will grant to us.

Thank you. I have been praying about this since it began. I was hoping God would just automatically take those feelings away, but that hasn't been the case. I know He is able, so there must be a reason He hasn't done so yet.

 

[Halbhh]

Thank you. I have been praying about this since it began. I was hoping God would just automatically take those feelings away, but that hasn't been the case. I know He is able, so there must be a reason He hasn't done so yet.

Well, you can have total belief when you pray the words Christ gave us! That faith He said is what we need in prayer (Mark chapter 11). This is also another way this prayer in Matthew 6 is so powerful. If you pray it with faith, a difference will happen.

(also, I notice another good help just below: Christ told us to do the steps needed to avoid temptations also)

 

[Albion]

God made humans, and the humans (in the person of Adam and Eve) chose to disobey God, leaving us, their descendants, as flawed creatures. Not useless or totally evil, but flawed. God will intervene in response to prayer but ordinarily not to make us less human, if you see what I mean.

Yes, we have feelings and they can lead us astray, so if the temptation is very strong, the prudent course may be to run away from it. Even some pretty highbrow theologians would say that to you, although with more elegant words.

 

[kbee125]

I'm sorry you have this dilemma! I would run as a last resort, but if it were the last resort, run I would. Best to study God's Word and try to get closer to Him. The Bible says with any temptation there will be an escape route given.

Thank you. I will leave if these feelings don't go away soon. I will just keeping praying for now.

 

[kbee125]

One of the best ways to deal with lust is to pray for the object of it. Not 'for' them as to have them, but 'for' them as to their benefit - health, peace of mind, body, spirit, spiritual walk. Sounds like you have more of a crush than out and out lust, but it would probably work just the same. Hard to fantasize about someone when you are praying for their true benefit.

That's a really great idea. I will do that. Thank you!

 

[Albion]

Yes, pray but minimize the temptation if possible also.

Is this person unavoidable or a close friend already...or could you simply take care to not cross paths with her, hoping that this might lessen the temptation?

 

[timothyu]

I feel like there's a battle inside me.

Are you kindred spirits? Are you very much alike or is this an unknown pheromone thing? Either can have a strong pull and the two can be confused.

 

[kbee125]

Yes, pray but minimize the temptation if possible also.

Is this person unavoidable or a close friend already...or could you simply take care to not cross paths with her, hoping that this might lessen the temptation?

I'm actually really good at avoiding her, lol. She's on the worship team, but I always close my eyes when I worship so it's not a problem. The only time it's hard to avoid her when we have social events at church cause she seems to be involved in everything.

 

[Albion]

Probably not easily avoided, then. The reason I asked is because although I said not to view the idea of leaving the church as unthinkable, it would be a last resort. I hope it doesn't come to that, but if things get worse, it might.

 

[kbee125]

Are you kindred spirits? Are you very much alike or is this an unknown pheromone thing? Either can have a strong pull and the two can be confused.

I don't know much about her because I usually avoid her. But what I do know is that we have very similar mannerisms.

 

[kbee125]

Probably not easily avoided, then. The reason I asked is because although I said not to view the idea of leaving the church as unthinkable, it would be a last resort. I hope it doesn't come to that, but if things get worse, it might.

I am willing to leave. It would be very hard because I love my church, but I would do it.

 

[timothyu]

. But what I do know is that we have very similar mannerisms.

So you could be related. What I am saying is there are all sorts of reasons we may click with others. The question you have to deal with is why do you interpret it as sexual?

 

[kbee125]

So you could be related. What I am saying is there are all sorts of reasons we may click with others. The question you have to deal with is why do you interpret it as sexual?

That's a really good question. It could be because I have a hard time trusting men. And I was going through a man hating phase (happens a lot) when I first noticed her in that way.

 

[timothyu]

It could be because I have a hard time trusting men. And I was going through a man hating phase (happens a lot) when I first noticed her in that way.

That could apply to men also. Can you trust a woman more than a man, especially in a sexual relation?

 

[kbee125]

That could apply to men also. Can you trust a woman more than a man, especially in a sexual relation?

I have never been in a sexual relationship so I don't know. I just know women have never hurt me like men have, so I trust them more. Plus it's either to relate to women since I am one.

 

[Halbhh]

I have never been in a sexual relationship so I don't know. I just know women have never hurt me like men have, so I trust them more. Plus it's either to relate to women since I am one.

One of the amazing good gifts we can have is once we realize God wants us to love others widely (as we learn from Christ's words so powerfully, in a way that convinces the heart, when we read His actual wording) -- that direct reading of Christ's words builds our faith and makes us know that God will answer our prayers for wonderful things like emotional healing of old emotional wounds (because it's His will that we love our brothers and sisters better)! I know this first hand, because I prayed that, and it happened!