I Love You...

[Inkachu]

I'm the only one who was 10 or more lol. I was a hot little cookie as a teen, always "in love" with someone. As an adult though, I've done a complete 180 and now I don't say it to anyone unless I'm in a really serious relationship...and I've only had a handful of those. Only had one b/f in the past several years.

 

[GuacaMolly]

Twice. I did love someone that didn't love me back once, I hope that never happens again.

Isn't three a lucky number? Maybe the next time it'll be for keeps.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Twice. I did love someone that didn't love me back once, I hope that never happens again.

Isn't three a lucky number? Maybe the next time it'll be for keeps.

Ooooo excellent point!!! Even though I never said the words, I have loved 2 men so maybe number 3 will be my lucky number too!

 

[BoarderDave]

Twice. I did love someone that didn't love me back once, I hope that never happens again.

Isn't three a lucky number? Maybe the next time it'll be for keeps.

Number three is my lucky number in this scenario.

 

[deliciousBass]

I have said "I love you" romantically to two women. I said it to my first girlfriend in high school. We dated for about two years. And... I said it to my ex... I fell in love with her after 2 dates... I wear my heart on my sleeve. I want to say it again someday...

 

[dluvs2trvl]

I have said "I love you" romantically to two women. I said it to my first girlfriend in high school. We dated for about two years. And... I said it to my ex... I fell in love with her after 2 dates... I wear my heart on my sleeve. I want to say it again someday...

I think that is wonderful! Do you think you are ready to say it again if you met the right person or do you think you still have some healing to do from your last break up?

 

[latteda]

Once, when I didn't know what I was talking about.

There was another time I could have said it and meant it but I never did.

 

[overit]

Funny, how I have said that to so many friends, family and my sons...but guys?How many I've said it to? Two, my exh was one. The other was the guy I dated seriously and we were talking marriage. However-it took me a much shorter time to get past him, and I had made the decision to break it off...the relationship wasn't right for many reasons. So I loved him on the surface but not deeply. Loved more the idea then him.The two I didn't say it to, that love persisted for them for quite some time-one was a friend/casual relationship and we parted on good terms-the relationship gave to me what I needed, but I realized when we were apart that I did indeed love him, it took some time to get over that but I did. I never said it though.The other one, well he did say it to me several times, I didn't respond-and I'm glad, it's a complex situation. I still love him.So in summary: Didn't say it to the two I loved most, said it to my exh when I think it was more traumatic bonding then love, and the other guy I wasn't truly in love with lol. That just makes perfect sense.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Funny, how I have said that to so many friends, family and my sons...but guys?How many I've said it to? Two, my exh was one. The other was the guy I dated seriously and we were talking marriage. However-it took me a much shorter time to get past him, and I had made the decision to break it off...the relationship wasn't right for many reasons. So I loved him on the surface but not deeply. Loved more the idea then him.The two I didn't say it to, that love persisted for them for quite some time-one was a friend/casual relationship and we parted on good terms-the relationship gave to me what I needed, but I realized when we were apart that I did indeed love him, it took some time to get over that but I did. I never said it though.The other one, well he did say it to me several times, I didn't respond-and I'm glad, it's a complex situation. I still love him.So in summary: Didn't say it to the two I loved most, said it to my exh when I think it was more traumatic bonding then love, and the other guy I wasn't truly in love with lol. That just makes perfect sense.

LOL! I know what you mean...matters of the heart never seem to make much sense do they...that's what makes me wonder if I'll ever get it right...will the timing be right...will the guy be right...will I be brave enough to say it when I feel it??? Hmmm.....all interesting questions for me to ponder...

 

[traingosorry]

I have been in two long-term relationships (3 yrs each) and I have said it to both. The first one though looking back wasn't true love and I know that only after having experienced it with the second guy.

 

[deliciousBass]

I think that is wonderful! Do you think you are ready to say it again if you met the right person or do you think you still have some healing to do from your last break up?

Oh, I know myself very well.. I've never been more comfortable being single than I am now. So even though every once in a while I relapse and get a little bummed, I think I'm ready to say it again.

I don't think it's hard for me to fall in love... I can talk to somebody for 5 mins and very quickly figure out whether or not they are the type of woman I could fall for. So yeah, I don't want just somebody I can get along with whom I love, I want true compatibility, so that makes me a little pickier.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Oh, I know myself very well.. I've never been more comfortable being single than I am now. So even though every once in a while I relapse and get a little bummed, I think I'm ready to say it again.

I don't think it's hard for me to fall in love... I can talk to somebody for 5 mins and very quickly figure out whether or not they are the type of woman I could fall for. So yeah, I don't want just somebody I can get along with whom I love, I want true compatibility, so that makes me a little pickier.

Excellent post DB! I like your way of thinking...

 

[dluvs2trvl]

I have been in two long-term relationships (3 yrs each) and I have said it to both. The first one though looking back wasn't true love and I know that only after having experienced it with the second guy.

Is there anything definite that defined it differently for you the second time as true love or is it just the way you felt when you were with the second guy that made you realize the difference?

 

[traingosorry]

Is there anything definite that defined it differently for you the second time as true love or is it just the way you felt when you were with the second guy that made you realize the difference?

Yeah 2nd guy made me feel differently and he treated me so much better than the first guy did. I was young and naive when I started dating the first guy, who was already a good 5 years older than me. My perception was a bit skewed, only I didn't know it at the time.
I learned a lot about respect in my second relationship and that it is pivotal in making things work.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Yeah 2nd guy made me feel differently and he treated me so much better than the first guy did. I was young and naive when I started dating the first guy, who was already a good 5 years older than me. My perception was a bit skewed, only I didn't know it at the time.
I learned a lot about respect in my second relationship and that it is pivotal in making things work.

That's one thing I've learned as well...mutual respect is soooo very important. I think that for me was one of the elements missing with the other guys I've dated that I never "felt" love for...

One thing my oldest sister has always told me - you should never be made to feel that you're lucky a guy is dating you...you should feel equal in the relationship. When you are put into a position of feeling like you're lucky that a guy is giving you the time of day or is "gracing" you with his presence then you start losing your own identity and you start acting in ways to "earn" and keep his attention and love...

That isn't what mutual respect is all about...

(hope that made sense )

 

[traingosorry]

That's one thing I've learned as well...mutual respect is soooo very important. I think that for me was one of the elements missing with the other guys I've dated that I never "felt" love for...

One thing my oldest sister has always told me - you should never be made to feel that you're lucky a guy is dating you...you should feel equal in the relationship. When you are put into a position of feeling like you're lucky that a guy is giving you the time of day or is "gracing" you with is presence then you start losing your own identity and you start acting in ways to "earn" and keep his attention and love...

That isn't what mutual respect is all about...

(hope that made sense )

Absolutely, and 2nd guy always told me he felt lucky to have me. It a nice difference.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Absolutely, and 2nd guy always told me he felt lucky to have me. It a nice difference.

That's what I felt with the 2 guys I loved - we both felt lucky to have each other...obviously at some point that wasn't enough but it was nice to feel secure and able to just be myself and now that I was accepted and cared about just because I was me...that's one of the elements I'm looking for in my next relationship....being accepted for who I am right now and being able to accept him for who he is, right now, with no expectations for change...even though I know we will both change but I think it is soooo very wrong to go into a relationship expecting someone to change for you...

 

[Markus6]

Never felt it and never said it. Not sure what it will feel like if I do and whether I'll realise it.

My ex told me she loved me just before Christmas. I broke up with her just after new year.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Never felt it and never said it. Not sure what it will feel like if I do and whether I'll realise it.

My ex told me she loved me just before Christmas. I broke up with her just after new year.

do you think the fact that she said she loved you played into you breaking up with her? Did it scare you? Or did you just realize that you didn't feel the same way about her?

 

[LonelyTraveler]

I've said it a few times. Of course they all thought I was joking or meaning "just friends" so they didn't mind. I guess people think that until [they think that] I love myself then I couldn't love them, so if I say then I must be joking. They don't know that it's real.