For the longest time I thought I was going to hell because of bets that I made in my head. Now I realize I'm going to hell because of my worst sins. I feel really stupid. The voices in my head say I will die due to my sins. I feel like my sins are too awful to be forgiven. All day long I am miserable. These voices bother me day and night. One voice says he is trying to save me, but he keeps trying to get me to do something I don't want to do. All day long he tells me to do things that I don't want to do. He says if I do what he tells me it will save my life. I believe he is telling the truth, but I'm still too afraid to do what he tells me to do.
I wish that the medications I'm taking would remove the voices, but they don't. They help a little so that I can sleep, but they don't remove the voices at all. I'm taking 600 mg Clozaryl and 5 mg Haldol. People tell me, "You should try another drug," but I swear I've taken a lot of them.
I feel like there is no hope. The voices say I will die in a horrible way and afterward I will wake up in a coffin. They say there is no way out of the coffin and I'll be trapped there forever. One voice laughs at me all day long. He says he is the devil himself. He says he knows the future, and I'm going to hell and there is no way out. He laughs at me and says "You're just bad enough." He says I will die due to my sins and that afterward I will wake up in a coffin.
I feel like God has no mercy for me. People say he loves me, but all day long I'm suffering from voices, and these voices feel like a punishment from God. I feel like I've tried everything to get rid of them, but nothing works. They laugh at me all day long.
Anyway, I want help, but I don't think anyone can help me. Only God can save me but he is unwilling. One voice in my head says he will save me if I just do what he says, but so far I've been too afraid to do what he tells me to.
I wish that the medications I'm taking would remove the voices, but they don't. They help a little so that I can sleep, but they don't remove the voices at all. I'm taking 600 mg Clozaryl and 5 mg Haldol. People tell me, "You should try another drug," but I swear I've taken a lot of them.
I feel like there is no hope. The voices say I will die in a horrible way and afterward I will wake up in a coffin. They say there is no way out of the coffin and I'll be trapped there forever. One voice laughs at me all day long. He says he is the devil himself. He says he knows the future, and I'm going to hell and there is no way out. He laughs at me and says "You're just bad enough." He says I will die due to my sins and that afterward I will wake up in a coffin.
I feel like God has no mercy for me. People say he loves me, but all day long I'm suffering from voices, and these voices feel like a punishment from God. I feel like I've tried everything to get rid of them, but nothing works. They laugh at me all day long.
Anyway, I want help, but I don't think anyone can help me. Only God can save me but he is unwilling. One voice in my head says he will save me if I just do what he says, but so far I've been too afraid to do what he tells me to.