I ep getting approached by guys...old ones

[redleghunter]

This is an issue because it really creeps me out, just now when one as walking with my little brother to the gym and a guy in a van slowed down...

And said ,well hello there..and other things. I don't know this guy at all so its awkward to do that to someone you don't know.

The day before another slowed down in a golf cart.

Even though I'm 25, I'm small height wise...and have been told I look 18.but also pretty curvy ...like its just creepy.....for someone to hit on a person that just looks that young...you know? Its just weird.

Any solutions?

It really makes me wary of living alone..

I am assuming these males are much older than you?


If so, I am sorry there are dirty old men looking at you and potentially stalking you. Some men never grow up, especially some who never marry or have children of their own.


However, the creepy slowing down the van and approaching SHOULD concern you no matter the age of the man (or dare I say woman).

 

[paul becke]

By the way, for anyone who thinks drive-by pickups are normal or polite, I would point out that huge numbers of murders occurred due to such incidents.

I drive by lots of attractive women, and never in my life have I felt it appropriate to cat-call any of them. It's just not a nice thing to do.

Absolutely. And I think abductors are the most dangerous of individuals, and should virtually automatically always be locked away until the day they die. The person who suggested it was normal courting, well, words fail me.

 

[RaymondG]

Usually God wants us to use normal means before relying on His own direct, spiritual intervention. This normally applies in the sphere of medicine as well.

So God would rather us smote the rock than to speak to it?

 

[redleghunter]

By the way, for anyone who thinks drive-by pickups are normal or polite, I would point out that huge numbers of murders occurred due to such incidents.

I drive by lots of attractive women, and never in my life have I felt it appropriate to cat-call any of them. It's just not a nice thing to do.

My sister worked at a large corporate building in NYC before she was married. She walked from the subway past a construction site before getting to the building. She learned how to handle cat-callers, especially construction workers. The best was "how much do you guys make a year?" Thus putting them on notice they would not have a chance of a date unless they made good money.

After a few times of this, they stopped cat calling her.

 

[paul becke]

By the way @paul becke, in the US, women can obtain permits for the concealed carry of handguns and other weapons that are illegal in the UK; our police are armed, unlike most British police, and as a result women in this country are generally very safe.

We have strong laws concerning rape; very tough requirements for the registration of sex offenders.

The US is as safe as any Commonwealth country for women; probably safer than the UK. If I had to guess I would say only Australia and New Zealand are likely safer from a women's perspective.

Well, that is very pleasing to hear, Paul. Very pleasing. Did you know that when the Allies were liberating France, French women would not go out unaccompanied by a male, for fear of being raped by GIs. This was in Normandy. Whether it applied elsewhere I don't know. The historian who wrote about it was the American, double Pulitzer-Prize winning journalist, Rick Atkinson, in his trilogy on WWII. A brilliant writer, including quotes from private solidiers and their families, the generals and the statesmen. A fascinating chronicle of the war.

But I wouldn't be too proud of your country's need for the civil population to carry guns, your record with their possession, their uses and abuses is horrendous.

 

[paul becke]

So God would rather us smote the rock than to speak to it?

Why don't you try both ?

 

[Paul Yohannan]

Did you know that when the Allies were liberating France, French women would not go out unaccompanied by a male, for fear of being raped by GIs.

That is simply untrue; the US forces were welcomed enthusiastically, and fought alongside French and British forces under the command of De Gaulle and Monty. Rape is not accepted in the US now, and was not accepted during WWII. The actions of the US military in France liberated France from Nazi tyranny, and delivered your own country from the horror of the V1 bomb. Would you rather we had remained at home?

I would also note the US had a much better record in terms of rape than several other combatants in WWII. The mass rape incidents involving the Soviet Army in East Prussia, for example, or the terrible scandals of institutionalized rape in the form of the "comfort women" exploited ruthlessly by the Japanese.

 

[Paul Yohannan]

But I wouldn't be too proud of your country's need for the civil population to carry guns, your record with their possession, their uses and abuses is horrendous.

These weapons, and also less than lethal weapons, are carried by many women and provide a valuable means of self-defense. Many women conceal-carry handguns, pepper spray or tasers, and these provide them with safety in certain rural areas where police response is slowe than it would be in the urban centers of the UK.

The fact all of our police are armed provides a further deterrence against sex crime.

In the UK in recent years, there have been incidents where sex crimes involving ethnic minorities, against women and children, particularly those involving the Asian ethnic communities, have not been adequetely investigated or handled by your police.

 

[paul becke]

These weapons, and also less than lethal weapons, are carried by many women and provide a valuable means of self-defense. Many women conceal-carry handguns, pepper spray or tasers, and these provide them with safety in certain rural areas where police response is slowe than it would be in the urban centers of the UK.

The fact all of our police are armed provides a further deterrence against sex crime.

In the UK in recent years, there have been incidents where sex crimes involving ethnic minorities, against women and children, particularly those involving the Asian ethnic communities, have not been adequetely investigated or handled by your police.

Yes, I believe you're right concerning the grooming of young girls by some Asian males. I didn't know it wasn't being handled effectively, but don't doubt it. Police forces tend to vary in quality, presumably depending to some extent on the prevailng culture when a new chief takes over.

The Edinburgh police are very keen, but at the same time, not martinets - not pedantic about if your limo is a few inches over the line at a tee-junction. In England, it tends to be the opposite, I think. People whose houses have been burlged, unless monied folk, complain that they will be visited by an officer, but that's the last they'll hear of the matter.

And the fact that rape and its perpetrators are being managed with appropiate concern and severity in the US is no mean achievement in our crazy world.

 

[paul becke]

That is simply untrue; the US forces were welcomed enthusiastically, and fought alongside French and British forces under the command of De Gaulle and Monty. Rape is not accepted in the US now, and was not accepted during WWII. The actions of the US military in France liberated France from Nazi tyranny, and delivered your own country from the horror of the V1 bomb. Would you rather we had remained at home?

I would also note the US had a much better record in terms of rape than several other combatants in WWII. The mass rape incidents involving the Soviet Army in East Prussia, for example, or the terrible scandals of institutionalized rape in the form of the "comfort women" exploited ruthlessly by the Japanese.

Well, if you think you know better than Rick Atkinson, that's that. Comparing the rape records of respectively the Russians against the Germans, after what they did in Russia, and the Americans againts French women in occupied France, is comparing apples with oranges.

Also, the Russians broke the back of the German army, and suffered more fatalities in the Battle of Kursk alone, than the rest of the Allies suffered all together - including in the Far East. As Stalin said, the British supplied the time, the Americans the money and the Russians, the blood. The Russians would have beaten the Germans anyway, but we Brits would have been speakng Russian without you, Yanks.

Roosevelt brought the US into the war, because it was likely that had Hitler succeeded in Europe, it was just a question of time, before he targeted the US. Roosevelt ws the nly leader who brought his cotry ourt of that war very much a financial winner, having struck hard bargains with us 'cleaned-out' imperialists. It's an old adage that countries don't have friends, just interests. Of course, speaking the same language - joking apart - must be propitious.

Many of our families, including mine, received food-parcels as well from kind American people at that time - when food was rationed over here.

 

[Paul Yohannan]

Yes, I believe you're right concerning the grooming of young girls by some Asian males. I didn't know it wasn't being handled effectively, but don't doubt it. Police forces tend to vary in quality, presumably depending to some extent on the prevailng culture when a new chief takes over.

The Edinburgh police are very keen, but at the same time, not martinets - not pedantic about if your limo is a few inches over the line at a tee-junction. In England, it tends to be the opposite, I think. People whose houses have been burlged, unless monied folk, complain that they will be visited by an officer, but that's the last they'll hear of the matter.

And the fact that rape and its perpetrators are being managed with appropiate concern and severity in the US is no mean achievement in our crazy world.

In the US, rape is a high priority for law enforcement. We have mandatory registration of sex offenders and restrictions on where they can live, and so on. In California, sex offenders after being released from prison are confined to a mental hospital (which was visited by Louis Theroux).

 

[Paul Yohannan]

..

 

[Der Alte]

I saw above where someone recommended pepper spray which is good unless it is prohibited by law. I recently saw part of a self defense video, the instructor recommended wasp spray which is not illegal anywhere. Pepper spray requires that the target be almost arms length away but wasp spray reaches out about 20-25 feet. While someone is dealing with wasp spray in their eyes the prospective victim can be putting more distance between them.

 

[Far Side Of the Moon]

So my thread is open again, I'm very glad because this is a discussion that needs to be had,

 

[Far Side Of the Moon]

My sister worked at a large corporate building in NYC before she was married. She walked from the subway past a construction site before getting to the building. She learned how to handle cat-callers, especially construction workers. The best was "how much do you guys make a year?" Thus putting them on notice they would not have a chance of a date unless they made good money.

After a few times of this, they stopped cat calling her.

Interesting lol...anywho my dad is gonna sign me. Up for jui jitsu this summer so ill be ready either way. I think this class will give me the confidence need.

 

[Paul Yohannan]

So my thread is open again, I'm very glad because this is a discussion that needs to be had,

Indeed so!

 

[paul becke]

That's a bit of a back-door appeal to authority.

No. Front door, Paul. And I make no apologies for it. To pit our knowledge against any professional historian would be ludicrous, and Atknson isn't just 'any historian', either.

 

[Paul Yohannan]

I saw above where someone recommended pepper spray which is good unless it is prohibited by law. I recently saw part of a self defense video, the instructor recommended wasp spray which is not illegal anywhere. Pepper spray requires that the target be almost arms length away but wasp spray reaches out about 20-25 feet. While someone is dealing with wasp spray in their eyes the prospective victim can be putting more distance between them.

My only concern about pepper spray or wasp spray is the risk of self-incapacitation. A lot of the time police inadvertantly get it in their own eyes. For this reason I suggest to @Far Side Of the Moon exploring a taser or a CCW for a handgun.

 

[Paul Yohannan]

No. Front door, Paul. And I make no apologies for it. To pit our knowledge against any professional historian would be ludicrous, and Atknson isn't just 'any historian', either.

I don't want to deep dive into this issue here, because Christian Advice is not a debate forum and we are drifting off topic, but if you post another thread in an appropriate forum and @ tag me on it I will be happy to continue this discussion.

 

[Paul Yohannan]

Interesting lol...anywho my dad is gonna sign me. Up for jui jitsu this summer so ill be ready either way. I think this class will give me the confidence need.

I don't reccommend the Japanese martial arts for personal security; I think they are overrated, a bit focused on aesthetics, and not really greatly effective for actual self-defense.

They are good for exercise and general physical health. A lot of aspects of jiu jitsu won't be of use (for example, the somersaults).

The only thing I learned in it that struck me as being of tactical use was a technique for escaping a grab on your wrist.

Krav maga strikes me as being a more practical martial art. I also suggest you look into a firearm (CCW permit + firearm safety training on your weapon), or a TASER.