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Featured I don't trust people

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by Introverted1293, Sep 7, 2019.

  1. Introverted1293

    Introverted1293 My name is Jesse Supporter

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    Is it wrong to not trust people any more? I have closed my heart to human beings because I no longer trust them. I don't trust the motivation of other believers. When a Christian is telling, for example, that I am wrong, even if they maybe right, I don't trust that they have my best interest. They are only interested in making themselves look more righteous and holy. That is how I feel sometimes.

    I am hardly around other Christians, for I don't fellowship with a congregation. And most of my friends are not even Christians. Mind you, I have very very little friends. And I just choose to stream my sermons. But the Christians I have known in the past have told that I was wrong and I shouldn't doing this or that, or I should be doing this or that. I got really angry because I did not ask them and because I don't want mere human beings correct me. I prefer that just the Bible correcting me.

    But I still come on here and ask questions because I do want to know. I have in the past got offensive because some of the answers are things I did not want to hear. But I am learning to adapt to that.

    So the question is, is it wrong that I have chosen not to trust people, even those who are believers? I can handle asking questions online, but I can't handle talking to people one-on-one offline. The Bible tells us to confess our sins one to another, but I do not trust that other believers will not condemn me.
     
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  2. Lost4words

    Lost4words In reality, an old dog! Supporter

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    Firstly, you have lots of 'real' friends on here.

    Secondly, you have to be true to yourself. Of which, you are. Trust has to earned and if you feel that you cannot trust someone with your views or opinions then so be it. Try not to let it get to you my friend.

    You clearly have a strong love of God.
     
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  3. Introverted1293

    Introverted1293 My name is Jesse Supporter

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    Thank you very much:)
     
    Last edited: Sep 7, 2019
  4. Darkhorse

    Darkhorse just horsing around

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    Trust comes with having positive experience with people, and it can be damaged easily. I'm not a very trusting person either, but I gradually develop trust for other people as our relationship expands and they show that they are trustworthy.

    One of my in-laws likes to say: "I trust everyone until they give me a good reason not to".
    Problem is, it's too late then.
     
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  5. Introverted1293

    Introverted1293 My name is Jesse Supporter

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    Thank you very much. :)
     
  6. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❣️ His little lady ❣️ Supporter

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    We are told to guard our hearts not to close them. The latter is often the result of hurt or rejection and we must forgive and pray fervently against its presence.

    The remedy is love. Pray 1 Corinthians 13 and take note of every internal jerk. You’ll have them! These are problem areas you need to give attention to.

    Ask the Lord to bring you faithful friends and spiritual companions. Ask Him to make you the sort of friend who sticks closer than a brother.

    Forgive liberally and be kind to everyone you encounter just because. Your heart will open in time. Like a little bud. Don’t give up. That’s what he wants.

    We have a new heart. Take hold of what’s been done for your benefit.
     
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  7. MasterYourLife

    MasterYourLife Active Member

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    The heart of sin is pricked by truth.
    If someone judges you righteously, it's good to learn and reprove yourself. It's a struggle for those with a prideful mind.
    Jesus says, "I rebuke and chasten those who I love".
    Definitely some people judge in a game of spiritual one-upmanship. I will admit, it takes a hold of me sometimes as well, and I need to reprove myself.
    I would say it is wrong to not trust a Christian. Because if a spiritual man full of the Holy Spirit judges you for reproof, and you don't trust his judgement, then you will stay in your sin.
    How will you ever become perfect in God, if you can't accept all criticism. If someone judges you, and their judgement is true, then you should accept it.
    If you trust in God's judgment, but not if that judgement comes from man, then that is the work of pride. God resists the proud.
    I may be wrong, keep that in mind. But it's for Christians to keep each other upright, but for yourself to be righteous.
     
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  8. ilovejcsog

    ilovejcsog I am a Christian mutt.

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    Its understandable:)
    God bless you and guide you.
     
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  9. joshua 1 9

    joshua 1 9 Well-Known Member Supporter

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    We are to allow the Holy Spirit to be our teacher and our guide. I believe the atonement is two fold. Jesus died to reconcile us with the father and he also died to reconcile us with each other. I raised my son to develop good communication skills with people. So he gets along well with others. That does not mean he trusts them. Working on and developing good people skills I think is important in life for our own feeling of self worth. Although some people are happy and content to spend time alone. We are living stones in the temple of God. Still we are told that the stones were hammered and shaped in the quarry. So when they built the temple everything was ready to assemble. So God does work on us as an individual, even though we are a part of the Church.
     
  10. Jude1:3Contendforthefaith

    Jude1:3Contendforthefaith Well-Known Member Supporter

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    The Holy Spirit will show who is legit and who isn't.


    .
     
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  11. Sabertooth

    Sabertooth Repartee Animal: Quipping the Saints! Supporter

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    "And let us
    • consider one another in order to
    • stir up love and good works,
    • not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but
    • exhorting one another,
    and so much the more as you see the Day approaching." Hebrews 10:24-25 NKJV

    (You can't do that as a "lone wolf.")

    "Faithful are the wounds of a friend,
    But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful." Proverbs 27:6 NKJV
     
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  12. christine40

    christine40 Well-Known Member

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    recently I trusted a person because of them being an expert in their field & because they're Christian

    turns out they gave bad advice

    learned that just because someone is Christian, doesn't mean they'll give one good advice especially if their goal is to make money/they're a sales type person

    even though this happened, would say that in the future I'll still give people a chance but will be more cautious and not assume because they're Christian they know best
     
    Last edited: Sep 8, 2019
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  13. Jude1:3Contendforthefaith

    Jude1:3Contendforthefaith Well-Known Member Supporter

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    OP, also a real friend and a real Christian won't sugar coat the truth when you need to hear it, but hopefully they won't be a jerk about it either though. lol


    Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
    Proverbs 27:6



    .
     
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  14. longwait

    longwait Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, u r right. U can't trust everybody. So how can u find out whom u can trust? When u r in distress u can see who will rush 2 ur aid. Recently my family went through a horrible time & my own blood brother had no compassion at all & didn't do a thing. It was others, friends & a relative who rushed to our aid & bcoz of them we r okay now.
     
  15. Heavenhome

    Heavenhome Well-Known Member Supporter

    +2,350
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    Hello Introverted, It can be hard to trust people, I dont blame you and to be honest I don't think there is any person I would trust 100% including myself because all are sinners and even with the best intentions we can let someone down.

    My trust is really in God alone because I know He is truly the One who will never let us down.
    So don't be too hard on yourself, you do have friends here, brothers and sisters in Christ and most importantly you love God, you want to know Him more and He will NEVER let you down.:)
     
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  16. Ricky M

    Ricky M Member Supporter

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    People are no longer trust worthy. Sadly that includes a lot of Christians.
     
  17. Aabbie James

    Aabbie James A Slave of Christ Jesus

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    Psalms 118:8 It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.

    Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
     
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  18. DamianWarS

    DamianWarS Follower of Isa Al Masih Supporter

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    I would recommend you plug yourself into a house church or home bible study and be consistent with attending. Community is the glue of the church and we should not isolate ourselves, doing so will inevitably shift your Theological thinking into whatever flavour feels right because it will be unchallenged and this is dangerous.

    We need people and our faith needs community. I recommend a house church or home bible study because they are small and intimate. You can't hide in them but you also are not left out and develop real relationships with a small group who will knows your name, your joys, your struggles and how to pray and encourage you.

    Lone remote islands develop unique echo systems that can't be supported anywhere else, don't go so far from the mainland that you are no longer compatible with it. Losing trust with the world, everyone is wrong but you... these are signs you're going too far, try and come back.
     
    Last edited: Sep 10, 2019
  19. Hannah66

    Hannah66 Member

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    I struggle with this, too. I think we can Trust God though and it's great you are still staying connected to God even though you are not fellowshipping anyway. Be assured that God can be trusted. Non-christians, and even Christians will fail us.
     
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  20. Sketcher

    Sketcher Born Imperishable

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    Trust has to be earned. Of course, it can't be earned if you don't give people a chance to earn it. It takes time. In my men's group, there's a high level of trust with those of us who have been in it a long time, but it took some of us over a year to really open up about some things. It might take two or three years before you can really open up to someone who has shown himself to be trustworthy. That's not wrong. It is incumbent on us to allow people into our lives to give them a chance to earn that relational capital, though. And since we're Christians, we do need to give other Christians that chance.
     
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