I dont even have hope anymore

[monique2018]

anyone?

 

[Subaru17]

Monique,

What you experienced with the earrings is just more OCD, and it’s not that God isn’t helping you, he just isn’t helping you in the way you expect. I think God wants us live as healthy a life as possible and for you that means seeking help for your mental illness. So please continue on that path to getting help. Engaging OCD with more OCD will only yield yet more OCD. I have many times had pop up thoughts and vows when praying, the worst stuff you could imagine, it doesn’t mean anything. God understands your Illness and what you are going through.

 

[monique2018]

but I can't understand why is He not stopping this thoughts..?He knows they will make me only more depressed and confused, maybe He really wants from me what thought telling me to do

 

[Mari17]

but I can't understand why is He not stopping this thoughts..?He knows they will make me only more depressed and confused, maybe He really wants from me what thought telling me to do

NO, that is not true! Sorry I have not been active on here lately, usually I get notifications if there are new posts on threads but I have not been getting any so I didn't know there were new posts. There's no definite answer as to why God is not stopping the thoughts, but I tend to think of it in terms of a physical disability. He doesn't always heal physical disabilities such as diabetes, cancer, etc. The same goes for mental disabilities. BUT I believe He does lead and guide us, and provide wisdom and resources that we need. You have the tools you need to overcome this, it's just a matter of putting them into practice. Rather than "saving" you from this disorder, God can use it to make you a stronger, better person with more faith in Him. You are absolutely right, ignoring the thoughts is the way to go. I can't remember if I've said this before, but I think of fighting the OCD as implementing two strategies. One is ignoring the thoughts, or treating them as silly/meaningless by teasing them or asking for more. The second is NOT engaging in compulsions. That includes doing things like researching, trying to analyze things that bother you (like the troublesome posts on this thread), giving things away out of fear/OCD, etc. I don't know what happens, but it's like a glitch in our brains that latches onto one particular issue and makes us unable to process it logically. That's what you're doing with this issue right now. Your brain is making you think that giving things away is the singularly most important thing right now. It's not allowing for a balanced view, and it's not taking into consideration all that harm that might be cause by giving away things (such as hurting your relatives' feelings). You MUST resist these urges right now. You must resign yourself to being mentally uncomfortable right now. To feeling like you're taking a risk. It's only once your mind adjusts to that uncomfortable feeling of not having this issue figured out perfectly that you will be able to see it all more clearly again. Trust me, I've been there, time and time again. I've had OCD since I was eight years old (I'm thirty now), and have had what feels like every theme in the book. Just a few months ago, I was so entrenched in an obsession that I was literally lying down on the floor in misery. I was telling God, "God, I'm so confused that I honestly don't know what to do. Please help me." I felt like I could literally not tell the difference between OCD and my conscience. But what I've learned (and keep forgetting, and having to re-learn!) is that if it feels like OCD, it MUST be treated as OCD! No matter how scary it feels or how bad it makes you feel, you must do it. We know when it feels like OCD. Even if we're "afraid" it's not, we still know. And if we want to get better, it requires facing that giant of fear and saying no. It requires the perseverance of doing that over and over and over and over and over, until your brain finally gets the message that you WILL NOT LISTEN TO FEAR. And then it finally backs off, and gives you a chance to use your real, logical brain again. You can totally do this. God is on your side, because He doesn't want you to live in fear. When you're living in fear, it's overshadowing your trust in Him. He's given you everything you need to battle this. It just requires a leap of faith on your part. But that leap will make you stronger, and will make you have an even better, more trusting relationship with God. You can do this. Please PM me anytime you need to.

 

[monique2018]

hey Mari, was waiting for you to reply!
maybe its sign from God, maybe he doesn't want u to tell me about OCD that's why u couldn't see notification
I got phone call yesterday from mental health clinic that my therapist is not there anymore he is back to England so he wont be able to help me. I think it might be sign to! maybe God doesn't want me to find help for it because its not OCD?
I have been better last couple of days because I just ignore it and kind of give up-whatever happen that's ok with me. I am still selling my stuff on bidding wars thou, its kind of peace when I get rid of things which remind me about ocd..

 

[Mari17]

hey Mari, was waiting for you to reply!
maybe its sign from God, maybe he doesn't want u to tell me about OCD that's why u couldn't see notification
I got phone call yesterday from mental health clinic that my therapist is not there anymore he is back to England so he wont be able to help me. I think it might be sign to! maybe God doesn't want me to find help for it because its not OCD?
I have been better last couple of days because I just ignore it and kind of give up-whatever happen that's ok with me. I am still selling my stuff on bidding wars thou, its kind of peace when I get rid of things which remind me about ocd..

It's not a sign. I've heard many examples of people in the throes of an obsession who are worried that different circumstances are "signs" that their obsession is valid. Your OCD basically just wants to find a reason for you to believe that your obsession is true. It will continue to bring up reasons to try to convince you that it is. Your job, no matter the arguments that the OCD brings up, is to keep plowing ahead without giving it much attention, and living your life without giving into compulsions. If you really want to sell something, that's one thing. But I would highly suggest putting an end to any selling that you're doing based on fear or OCD. You may just have to resign yourself to feeling uncomfortable for now. When we have OCD, we want so badly to feel at peace that we're willing to do anything, but we're troubled because we know that what we feel we need to do is burdensome and oppressive and does not come from a positive motivation. But in order to circumvent the OCD, we have to be OK with not feeling at peace, temporarily. We have to be willing to not "solve" the anxiety, the problem that our OCD is bringing up, by doing compulsions. We basically have to stop doing the compulsions and start ignoring the thoughts, and to resign ourselves to just feeling not at peace. As our brains adjust, we will realize that we never had a reason to feel so disturbed and guilty, it was just our OCD making us feel that way. It's really important to keep practicing these ignoring anxiety and resisting compulsions strategies. I can tell you a million times that this whole thing is just an obsession, but until you start ACTING like it is (by resisting the urge to do what your anxiety is telling you to), your brain will not start believing it. Overcoming OCD requires doing the necessary actions before having the right feelings in place - and that's why it's so hard to do. But your normal feelings and way of reasoning will return, if you keep persevering!

 

[Subaru17]

hey Mari, was waiting for you to reply!
maybe its sign from God, maybe he doesn't want u to tell me about OCD that's why u couldn't see notification
I got phone call yesterday from mental health clinic that my therapist is not there anymore he is back to England so he wont be able to help me. I think it might be sign to! maybe God doesn't want me to find help for it because its not OCD?
I have been better last couple of days because I just ignore it and kind of give up-whatever happen that's ok with me. I am still selling my stuff on bidding wars thou, its kind of peace when I get rid of things which remind me about ocd..

Hi Monique,

You really need to listen to Mari. All the things you are saying are hallmark indicators of OCD. I honestly think you shouldn't be interpreting anything as signs until you get help. The OCD is a barrier that will make it almost impossible to discern whether or not God wants you to anything. Also definitely agree with Mari that you should not be selling anything! that is just giving in to the OCD. There is no long term benefit to feeding OCD for a short term relief of anxiety SYMPTOMS. If you fight the OCD your anxiety will increase but it can only increase so much before it will start to decrease as you start to adjust to it and realize that things are still okay.

 

[jusme]

Hi Monique,
I can very much relate to what you are experiencing. I am 53 and have had several of these kinds of anxiety producing bouts with OCD in my life. Now however, I am anxiety free and a living testimony that these disorders can be overcome. There is always hope in Jesus! Yes, I have been to Christian counseling and have been on medications (and still do take a small maintenance dose of SSRI's). I strongly encourage you to seek professional help in the form of medical and counseling. Medications are sometimes needed to help repair the misfiring signals in our brains so that we can think more clearly. It's like any other illness in the body. As to counseling, I would recommend someone who basis their counseling on the Word of God (the Bible).

Now to address some of your current personal concerns:

It seems, according to your posts I have read above, that in a nut shell you are worried that you are possibly disappointing God either by not doing some things you perceive as "good" or doing certain other things you perceive as "bad". This is very common with OCD.

First I will give you the bad news... According to God's word ALL of us (every human being that has ever existed or ever will exist) has failed to live up to God's perfect standard of righteousness (See Romans 3:23). Therefore, if you realize that you are an imperfect human being, congratulations you're in agreement with God! Secondly, the Bible tells us that there is nothing we can do to earn God's forgiveness or acceptance (See Titus 3:5). Now for the good news! God does not love us because of what we do or don't do for Him. He loves us in spite of what we do or don't do and He proved that when He sent his only begotten Son to die a brutal death in our place for the forgiveness of sin (see Romans 5:8).

So, we need to understand that it is not what we do or don't do that makes us acceptable to God. But, rather it is what God had done for us through his Son Jesus Christ that makes us acceptable to Him. There is nothing in all creation that is more liberating than coming to the knowledge of and accepting this truth! He loves me in spite of my flaws! We can truly find rest in Him and in His promises (see Matthew 11:28).

I hope this helps a little sweetie!

May God bless you

Ps: also read Psalm 46

 

[Celticroots]

Does OCD preventing people from having a loving and forgiving hearts ?

No. It’s an illness. There is NOTHING anyone can do to bring OCD upon themselves.

 

[Celticroots]

I don't know but maybe its not OCD but God, I will never be sure, it will kill me..I have so many panic attacks lately cant even drive car anymore

It’s OCD. Please get professional help.

 

[Celticroots]

Keep it simple . God thinks it seems that you have made an Idol out of fashion ,jewellery etc and what is the First commandment ? No idols which keep you from God .
Forget the OCD, it is your concience telling you to change .Start by being charitable and asking the women at church to give your clothes ,most of them, to those who need them ,as AKA describe said .
Your OCD will pass when the Holy Spirit no longer needs to prompt you .Nor does it mean you can never have a new dress or whatever ,but for now and quite a while ,your addiction to 'earthly ' glamour must be denied .
It is like a drug ,but the only drug you really need is the healing love of Jesus Christ ,all the rest is superficial . When you give up the 'drug' ,you will feel withdrawal symptoms ,let them pass ,and afterwards you will have peace ,wonderful peace .

It’s not the Holy Spirit. The only thing she needs right now is serious professional help by someone experienced in treating OCD and possibly to go back on medication.

 

[HeDeliveredMe]

It is vital to understand what Jesus was even talking about. He was not making up something new, He was referring to something taught first in the Torah. If He added to the Word (He cant do that because He IS the Word) then He would have been a false prophet according to the Torah. Check out the video by 119 ministries called The Unpardonable Sin. This is an issue because we have lost the hebrew and torah mindset and perspective that was always intended to be understood. Check out their other videos as well.
One more thing. I suggest the reason this issue only bothers people ONCE they hear of an unpardonable sin is because just as paul said, I did not know sin except by the law, and that once the law comes, sin takes an occasion and tempts us to DO what we know we should not do. Its how it works. So if someone tells you its wrong to think about the color red, youre going to suddenly struggle to not think about red. Thankfully, what you THINK is the unpardonable sin, is not what Jesus was actually saying. Language and CONTEXT is everything.

 

[Celticroots]

Mental illnesses like OCD aren't a choice. With OCD there is no such thing as freedom, just learning to manage it by using the tools you learned in treatment. Or seeking treatment again if symptoms are becoming harder to manage on your own, or by adding medication to the mix.

By doing both of those my quality of life has improved greatly.

It wont't happen over night, but it will get easier.

Also it's not wise to post personal information like your phone number to a bunch of strangers on the internet.