• The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.

    If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.

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Sarah G

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Sorry that you're feeling so low and rotten, Hope. It hurts so much when friendships end, online or otherwise. It just shows that you are a really lovely, sensitive person and that you haven't let your heart harden despite living in this cruel, cursed world. That probably isn't much consolation, though, eh? I have been through it quite a few times and it really is very painful. I find that it brings up old hurts and traumas too which makes it all worse. Well, I am likely to make you feel even more miserable with my sepia tinted tales of loneliness and misery and that won't help.

My advice, as always, is to be nice to yourself. Allow yourself to hurt and accept that your feelings are valid. Be kind to yourself and of course cry and wail and whimper and moan to Jesus. I am lighting a candle right here in my living room for you so you know there is a light burning somewhere in the world just for you :twohearts:
 
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Shadow

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hey @hope , fellow depression-sufferer here.

I'm sorry you are having to go through this and I would guess that this person means a lot to you which is why you feel upset. When something like this happens it is usually the way that we feel we've lost control over the situation and can't reach out to a person that hurts the most. Its compounded by the fact that we can't get the answer to a simple question as to "why" the person has done it and we begin to question if it is our own fault. When you have depression, it doesn't take much to knock you over and the combination of not knowing and not having control over the situation can do that.

In all probability, its not you. The internet is a truly vile and impersonal place where it is easy to "forget the human". Online relationships can make you feel closer and more intimate than you really are with a person. you can chat with them or see their picture and even though you may not have contact with them offline, they still feel part of your life. It gets harder if this is because of a row because it is just so much easier to pull the plug than to have to face up to the awkwardness of interacting with people online and you lose a sense of personal boundaries and privacy.

I had a row with a friend in 2013 and sent him a friend request this year. He accepted it and that was an amazing feeling. However, I don't expect to ever see him offline again and probably won't chat as there isn't much to chat about now. But it was still a great feeling simply because it didn't feel like it was my fault anymore and it was resolved somehow. Its stupid how much these things mean and get so blown out of proportion because of how we invest ourselves in things. I don't know the circumstances, but given the way we are all connected, it may not be forever. Until then, there is always a cup of hot chocolate to pick your strength up and be kind to yourself. It may be good to unplug from the internet for a while and go for a walk, or look something up to distract you until the feeling isn't so intense and passes. humour helps relieve the pain. The main thing is learning to trust yourself and realising that its not your fault. :)
 
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Far Side Of the Moon

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Yes this has happened to me. She picked a fight out of the blue and it got nasty and she just left. Idk its somewhat hard bc I really loved her strong ,take no crap from no one or nothing personality....
But one thing I can't do is disrespect, so it had to end.

I also think you shouldn't hold on to people desperately because most people may only be with you for a season ( you help them with what they need/guide them) and its simply time for them to move on.

It is hard though bc I give all my friends a custom tone, like when they message me bc I give everyone a custom tone I know exactly who it is before I look at the message. And I get a bit sad hearing the one I had set for her..

But its getting better.
 
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Shadow

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going for a walk soon, to one of my ministries. Hopefully, can give and get some hugs from my fellow soldiers out there who are homeless, plus cups of tea, coffee or cocco a plenty.

I hope you have a nice time. :)
 
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Far Side Of the Moon

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@Far Side Of the Moon .....I like that thought.....for a season.

let him move on then. I'm not staying in the kitchen. The head of the house is ME but of course its Christ, but He is living inside of me.
Yeah u have to let them move on... You can never hold on to people really, they have to want to be with you...if you havr to try and hold on to them...thats not a good sign.

Just free your self of the aggregation and just let go...though I know it can be hard..bc I knew her for 3 years...
 
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Far Side Of the Moon

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Ok, its still hurting.....nice thoughts that people share though, thank you.

we cant have any control over others that's just the truth aint it?!

I need to put on my wading boots to read any more of his stuff!
Oh yeah also, I think its beneficial to just make more friends in real life than online because I feel you would get more out of it.
And just stay busy ... That helps too.
 
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mukk_in

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Ever happen to you?

My depression is so bad now. I had to stop the wonder drug I took this summer, felt better for a bit and now am in the pits of sorrow again.

UG!

Too much going on that makes it worse irl as well.

Don't need any more pain, really.

:234:
Online friends aren't always real, genuine or sincere. The Lord Jesus is always there for you, as are we. Cheer up :).
 
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mukk_in

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@mukk_in you've always been there for others, strong, steady and true. I believe:oldthumbsup: in you.
Thanks. If ever you feel like this don't hesitate to PM me, if you wish. Peace in Christ :).
 
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